Bisexual? Really?

[biguycancun]

Those of you who followed my thread about being a "disposable lover" know that I am currently seeing, or dating or fucking a sympathetic doctor who was a witness to the unpleasantness that transpired upon the death of my longtime lover between his family and myself.

While at the moment this is a purely physical and intellectual relationship, the good doctor and I are closely matched in education, travel experiences, political opinions and most definetly sexual appetites. As only my sexond sexual encounter with a Black man, a man who fulfills that tired cliche of Black Man's Cock, I continue to be amazed by it and my ability and desire to have that big thing inside of me. As an aside, I've become aware of how much hearvier it gets when engorged and fully erect. I tease him about all the blood rushing from his big head to his little head. But I digress.

Last night, during a post-coital hugging talk, we ventured into a discussion of women and sex. BTW, he knows about my history of femme experiences. I confessed that I still look at women, but not as sexual objects, only as clothing models, appreciating their clothes and shoes and grooming. He laughed and admitted that he hasn't had sexual feeling towards women in years.

So the question, which he knows I'm sharing here, is that despite labeling yourself "Bisexual", are you bisexual? If he or I were to be judged by a jury of our peers, based on a decades long history of only male to male sex, my guess is we would be classifies as gay. What about you?

[csreef]

I'm happy that you found someone to connect to on so many levels!

[Jazminedress]

Its agood discussion question honestly............while I am not much into labels, as someone taught me here, labels belong on soup cans. There is a reality that everyone is in one or more categories.

I think this question can go deeper than simply ar eyou bi or not. If my mother passed away, I would still consider myself her son, even though she is no longer here. If my brother was no more, I would still refer to my brother, so there is that.

With being bi, it depends on how you define it. For me, it is the capacity to have feelings or desires (romantic) for members of the same sex, and or opposite sex. The physical act, or acting upon it is immaterial. Now of course there is a difference from I havent had a desire in a long time, or cannot see yourself ever engaging in hetero sex vs it could happen.


So, short answer long...............

If there is zero desire, you cant ever see having a desire and you know deep down that even if this relationship ended, you would not engage in hetero sex................then at that time, I would say you are probably gay. And this same scenario has happened to many people who took time to realize what they are.

If that door is fully open, then you would be bi.

now me, I like one of each please

[Footstep40]

Gay.. I think I’m just gay…again.

[KDaddy23]

Bisexuality isn't just sexual but it's the gauge in which we use to measure our sexual desires. I've had people tell me that I'm not bisexual because I don't have much romantic interest in men and not looking for any kind of a relationship and, well, just ignoring the fact that I'll sex the shit out of a guy and just as quickly as I would a woman... because why the hell not?

Bisexuality isn't how you define it because, duh, check the dictionary - the definition is there. It is, however, about how you think it applies to you or like a woman said on another site, she's 90% straight and 10% lesbian and she's all about the sex in either case. So, you like guys. You like gals. Now the devil in is your details as to what degree you like guys and gals and not having any sexual interest in women doesn't disqualify you from being bisexual and the question one might want to ask themselves is that if they had a chance to be sexual with a woman who resonated with them, would they have sex with her or just assume that they're 100% gay and say no even though you know that (1) you should bed her because you really want to and (2) she wants you to bed her.

I know three gay dudes who love having sex with women - and will tell you that they're gay all day long. I've known quite a few straight guys who have had oral sex with a guy as well as being on both ends of anal sex as well - and they'd tell you that they're straight now and forever. It's like how do you feel about women? If you like them only for their sense of fashion but wouldn't have sex with them, does it mean that you're fully gay? And that presumes the lie that gay dudes don't like women or their pussies and... shit, I don't know about you or your lover but I am bisexual. Have been since 1964. Like most guys, I had that moment when I wondered if I was really gay... and after spending two hours making love to my wife and leaving her taking a nap after the fact and the lightbulb came on and let me know that, um, no, not gay. I had a gay boyfriend and he was one of the gayest dudes I've ever met (or been with) but the relationship didn't make me gay any more than it made him bisexual although he did get some pussy for the first (and probably only) time in his life courtesy of my wife and I still remember laughing when he said that (1) he understands why I like women and pussy and (2) it's not something he'd do all of the time.

But sex isn't the only component to sexuality, and we just overlook this. I am bisexual. No question in my mind about that. Sex? You betcha! Could be romantic with a guy? I could be but I don't want to be bothered with that drama but, sure - been there, done that and, really, more than once. If I told you that I had no further sexual interest in women (1) I'd be lying my ass off but (2) not having sex with a woman doesn't make me any less bisexual since it's also a state of mind and just like being gay or straight is.

This shit will give you a headache. You know what your sexuality is; you know why you are the way you are; if you say that you're gay, then you're gay and your words should count just as much as your actions would. I'm bisexual. No one on this planet could convince me that I'm anything but bisexual and I don't have any hangups with the label because, um, duh, I like women and men (fuck all that irrelevant gender stuff because if you think you're a woman, lemme talk to ya about a little somethin'-somethin').

If you know how the sexuality labels are defined, then you should understand that, at the very least, they're a guideline because no matter which label might apply to you, you still have to decide and determine how to be the sexuality you choose to be and, ultimately, you are what you say you are.

[ac9803]

I spent a lot of time confused. How could I have feelings about sucking cock and still desire, date and whenever possible, fuck women?? Thank god I found out that a person can genuinely enjoy sex with men and women, especially when it occurs at the same time!
I am a bisexual man, and comfortable with it.

Cheers