Navigating Bisexual Desires Within Marriage ? How Have You Approached This?

[BiFocalDreams]

Hi everyone,

I?m in the process of navigating my bisexual desires while being in a committed marriage, and I?m curious to hear from others who?ve been in a similar situation. My wife and I have a strong relationship, and over the past several months, we?ve been having deeper conversations about individuality, intimacy, and the complexity of desire.

For me, I feel a deep connection to the idea of occasional male exploration, which is something I?m working to align with both my personal values and my commitment to my wife. I?m trying to approach this with mindfulness, openness, and patience, and I recognize the importance of building trust and creating space for both of us to explore our desires in a way that feels safe and respectful.

I?d love to hear from those who?ve navigated this journey:

How did you introduce the topic to your spouse/partner?

Did you explore this together at first, or was it more of an independent journey?

What boundaries or agreements have worked for you and your partner?

How did you ensure that trust and intimacy were preserved as you explored?


I?m particularly interested in hearing how others have maintained balance between honoring their desires and commitments to their partner. I think stories and insights from this group could provide guidance and perspective as I continue down this path.

Thanks in advance for sharing your experiences!

[NJwood]

This is my second marriage. While we were just getting to know each other we talked very frankly about our lives and sexual desires. It was during questions about threesomes that I told her I’d be good with another guy instead of a woman. That led to my telling her I had been with a guy. She wanted all the details and found it very erotic. She watched via webcam one encounter while we were still nonexclusive. Once we decided to marry it kind of fell by the wayside. Our sex life was very good until menopause. At that point sex became difficult and frustrating for her. With the decline I started playing with a dildo. When she came upon she asked if I still was interested in cock. It has always been about that and not a desire for intimacy with a man. She accepted that and agreed with me exploring it. We talked about what we both wanted and how it would happen. “Rules of Engagement”. I’d let her know if I was going to have a “date” and made sure the timing was good for her. That was the “not to interfere with her time with me” rule. I would share the details with her including any pics or videos. We openly discussed the encounters. My interests expanded to include anal sex. I’m a bottom so it was about me being on the receiving end. The interesting thing was this really ignited her passion. She has gotten over the issues experienced during menopause and has been even more involved in who I pick and what turns her on when she watches the videos. She has taken pics of me to share with prospective hook ups. We just keep the communication open and respect each others boundaries and desires. Despite offers of a bi threesome I’ve declined as she is the only woman I’ll have sex with. Multiple guys is fine. It’s been a door opened for her as well to try some stuff she wouldn’t have done with me before.

The key is really open and nonjudgmental communication. Be clear about boundaries and talk about them if there is something you want to try before doing so. Trust is a big factor.

[AbiMan69]

This is my second marriage. While we were just getting to know each other we talked very frankly about our lives and sexual desires. It was during questions about threesomes that I told her I?d be good with another guy instead of a woman. That led to my telling her I had been with a guy. She wanted all the details and found it very erotic. She watched via webcam one encounter while we were still nonexclusive. Once we decided to marry it kind of fell by the wayside. Our sex life was very good until menopause. At that point sex became difficult and frustrating for her. With the decline I started playing with a dildo. When she came upon she asked if I still was interested in cock. It has always been about that and not a desire for intimacy with a man. She accepted that and agreed with me exploring it. We talked about what we both wanted and how it would happen. ?Rules of Engagement?. I?d let her know if I was going to have a ?date? and made sure the timing was good for her. That was the ?not to interfere with her time with me? rule. I would share the details with her including any pics or videos. We openly discussed the encounters. My interests expanded to include anal sex. I?m a bottom so it was about me being on the receiving end. The interesting thing was this really ignited her passion. She has gotten over the issues experienced during menopause and has been even more involved in who I pick and what turns her on when she watches the videos. She has taken pics of me to share with prospective hook ups. We just keep the communication open and respect each others boundaries and desires. Despite offers of a bi threesome I?ve declined as she is the only woman I?ll have sex with. Multiple guys is fine. It?s been a door opened for her as well to try some stuff she wouldn?t have done with me before.

The key is really open and nonjudgmental communication. Be clear about boundaries and talk about them if there is something you want to try before doing so. Trust is a big factor.

I'll second that!

[MNBiGuy]

At 54 years old and my youngest being 18. If I did get divorced, I will never remarry. For a variety for reasons….financial etc. modern women are a pain in the ass. And the iPhones have make them ADHD. I’m a hopeless romantic but very much a realist. And give the last 14 years of my current sexless marriage, has brought out the bi side in me. Men are sooo wonderfully simple.