All Blog Entries

Chat and advise . . Sarasota - Ft Myers

[COLOR=#666666][FONT=Trebuchet MS]Does this sound familiar? You've just realized you are attracted to women or you have known for some time now. You happen to be married to a man and he doesn't know about your interest in other women. You are at the point where you cannot ignore these feelings any longer and you realize you’re going to have to tell your husband.[/FONT][/COLOR]
[COLOR=#666666][FONT=Trebuchet MS]
[/FONT][/COLOR][COLOR=#666666][FONT=Trebuchet MS]Everything that you’re feeling inside is affecting your relationship with your husband and whether you’re having an affair with a woman or not, he deserves to know what’s been going on with you. This may or may not be a relationship-changing event. Here are some things to consider before coming out to your husband as a lesbian or bisexual.

Your husband may be a great guy. You may still love him. He may be the father of your children and your partner in everything in life. Chances are he’s noticed changes in your behavior, sexually and otherwise, and how you react to him. He may be blaming himself for the distance he feels from you. When you decide the time is right to tell him, here are some tips on how best to go about it.

Timing

Coming out to your husband is not going to be easy. Make sure you plan to tell him during a period where you know he will have the time and space to process it. Don’t do it over a holiday or your anniversary. If you have children, you might want to see if you can get someone to watch them for a day. Allow for at least a few hours of uninterrupted time for the two of you to be alone together.

Reaction

There’s no way to know for sure how he will react. He may become angry. He may get sad. He may ask you to leave right away. Or he may wonder if there is anyway you can work things out with him. Be ready for any of these emotions to erupt and decide ahead of time how you will deal with each one.

What Do You Want?

Before you come out to him, you should have a good understanding of what you want out of your relationship with your husband. You may not know for sure, but one thing is certain, he’s going to ask you. You have to be ready to tell him what you are thinking and how you feel and what you see in the future for the two of you and your relationship. Do you want to leave? Do you want to try and stay, acknowledge your feelings for women and not act on them? Do you want to become non-sexual partners with him and pursue affairs with women? Do you want an open relationship where you continue to be lovers with him, but date women also? These are all options. He may or may not agree with any of them, but you can have a sense of what you desire before you come out to him.

Are You In Love with Another Woman?

ype of thing they figure out intellectually, but rather, an emotional thing that comes to a head and becomes a top priority issue once they have fallen in love with another woman. Here are some things to keep in mind if this is you: If this is your first time with a woman

The newness and intensity of a new love affair with a woman may throw you way off balance emotionally. The excitement and sexual attraction cannot compare to the everyday routine of a long-term relationship, especially if you've only had male-female relationships in the past. Try to keep this in mind as you sort out your feelings.

It is common for married women to fall in love with other married women. You may wonder, is it just this particular person or am I a lesbian or bisexual? Sometimes you just KNOW. Sometimes it takes some time and examination to figure out. If you need the time - take it. Be patient with yourself.

If you are in love with a married woman who has no desire nor intention of leaving her husband, this can cause a unique set of challenges. Some women in this situation decide not to come out to their husbands and continue to have an affair, in secret. This choice has the potential to destroy both relationships if it backfires and you are found out, so it is not recommended. Even if you are not found out, the jealousy, lies and need to constantly cover it up will slowly eat away at you. Eventually you will want to come clean.

Questioning Your Sexual Orientation?

You may not know yet if you are actually a lesbian, but you may be questioning it. It is okay to share your confusion and doubt with your husband. I have heard many stories of men who just want their wives to have a happy and fulfilling life, even if it is without them. Your husband may be the guy who stands by your side while you figure it out. He may surprise you. If you are married and can't figure out if you are lesbian, bisexual or straight, it might be a good idea to seek help from a professional therapist.


How to Come Out to Your Husband

You don’t have to have everything perfectly planned out or figured out, but these tips may help you prepare for telling your husband you are lesbian or bisexual:

1. Tell the truth. Speak for yourself using "I" statements. If you have been having problems with him, try to keep those issues separate from what is going on inside you.
2. Let him know it’s not his fault. That nothing he did caused you to be this way. You don’t have to tell him everything. You may want to spare him any details of your sexual experiences with others, but if you’ve put him at risk of any sexually transmitted diseases, you should let him know that.
3. Remember this is your first conversation about this and his initial reaction will not be his lasting one.
4. Don’t come out to him in anger.
5. Don’t expect him to be your primary support in this.
6. Be honest. Don’t give him false hope for your relationship if there is none.
7. Do seek the assistance of a relationship counselor. She can help you work it out, or break up in an amicable way.
8. Encourage him to find his own support. The Straight Spouse Network is one place he can go.

Regardless of how your session with your husband turns out, you will end the discussion feeling you have been upfront with him, have hidden nothing from him, and are ready to proceed with your life. It may not end up how you imagine, but in any case, you are who you are and your husband deserves to know. After all, it affects him as much as it affects you. You may be pleasantly surprised. Finally, he will appreciate your candor and the value you are placing on your relationship with him by "coming clean" and putting both of you in a position to make sound, caring decisions moving forward.

[COLOR=#333333][FONT=Helvetica Neue Light]For more information about[/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR][URL="http://www.bisexual-dating-site.com"][FONT=Trebuchet MS][COLOR=#0000ff][FONT=Arial]bisexual dating[/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][/URL][COLOR=#666666][FONT=Trebuchet MS][COLOR=#333333][FONT=Helvetica Neue Light],simply visit our website[/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][/COLOR]

Only God can make a tree

In the early evening, a storm approaching, we open the window and feel the crisp air fill the room, the sweet smell of a cool humidity, the sudden gusts that precede the calm before the storm, we stand at the window, our frocks billowing in unison, collapsing cleaner and cooler on our skin, the young oak next to the window determined not to bend in the storm, an adolescent imitation of its elders, the lights flicker out, lightning in the distance, the thunder a long time coming, as long as it takes my hand to find your waist, your hip to find my hip, my kiss to find your breast, thunder, eyes wide open, a light kiss in the light breeze, the calm is upon us, we decide to make love.
I spread your legs, my chest heaves its thrill, trillions of cubic tons of night air shift their weight, your smile flashes, there is lightning, the tree thrashes a long limb frantically against the window pane, I bend to you, the tree bends too, my penis hovers over your mound, the roots of the tree deep in the earth hold it upright, thunder, my heart beating next to your beating heart, your arms rise, the tree stands tall and straight, you are smiling, the waters of our mouths mingle, the rain falls sudden and warm, your nipples tremble as my kiss nears, the curtains thrust themselves into the room, I am deep inside you, you hold me there, the tree does not bend, the earth is unmoved though wet, the fine mist of blown rain covers my bare back, the storm gathers its intensity, a torrent of water thrown at the window, into the lightless cavern of the interior, a lamp falls but does not break, you knit an expression with your eyes, attentive, serious, clouded by an internal tumult, the storm is furious, but cannot move the earth, water flows in every direction, down from the heavens, down the smallest rill, between your legs, the earth pushes up into me, pushing flowers up into the rain, the raging sky met with beauty rising from the soil, I push deeply into you, give it to me, give it all to me, and you do, I want it, and you give it to me, to yourself, you open to me, your vaginal lips pressing out, wet on my testicles, the kiss of your sex on mine, opening yourself until I come into you and out of you comes beauty, a rainbow between our legs, the storm subsides, I fall limp against you, the rain ends, the roots of the tree hold on tight deep underground, then relax in the moist earth, and I love you, I love you, I love you.

I made the mistake of posting the best thing first, sigh. What I posted before was the closest I have to a sex scene, the rest are close but not quite, mostly just vampires feeding, like this one when my main character is turned...
----

"Are you sure you don't want to come?" I asked my husband before giving him a kiss.


"Yeah, you go. Have fun. I'll be fine," he replied after giving me a peck on the lips.


I kissed him again, harder, taking the kiss I wanted. "I don't have to go. I can stay here."


He started to put on his shoes. "No, you want to go, so go. I'll walk you out."


Before leaving, I checked my hair and dress again in the mirror. While I normally kept my makeup honest, tonight I was wearing bright red lip stain. With my fashionable new black dress and impractical heels, I felt stylish. Even my hair had more bounce and body, the brown had a more tinge of red to it, than usual. I wished he was coming. I wanted to be on the arm of a sexy man tonight.


We walked out to the car in silence. When he gave me another quick peck on the lips, I realized he was afraid of smudging my lipstick. "Have fun," he repeated.


"I love you," I said as he walked away.


"Love you too."


In a pair of tennis shoes, I could've walked to the club with no trouble. Instead I drove for my own comfort. There were plenty of places in the parking garage.


The Emcee, a friend of a friend, recognized me when I walked in. "Give her the member price," she said to the girl selling tickets. We made some light small talk before I wandered over to the only seat at the bar.


There was a drink in front of me before I had even settled down. The bartender, the same one that served me every Monday night, My Bartender, smiled at me with warm recognition.


"What's this?" I asked.


"We got in a new scotch," he said.


I took an experimental sip. It was caramelly and smooth. "This is good! What is it?"


He showed me the bottle. Scapa. "It's distilled on a northern Scottish island."


"Ooh, I like it even better," I said, and took another sip.


The place was starting to fill up. The tables next to the stage filled up first, with people dragging fold up chairs over to crowd around the small round tabletops. The sounds of instruments being tuned and drums being moved from behind the curtain interrupted the din of conversation.


My Bartender was starting to get busy as patrons were getting their first drinks of the night. Every once in a while, someone would approach the bar that I knew. They were all acquaintances, people I could exchange general niceties with, but wouldn't feel compelled to sit with. That made me happy, because I loved my exclusive seat at the bar. I also had a great view of the stage.


And then he walked up. "Jameson, please," he asked my bartender.


"Have you ever tried Scapa?" I asked, pointing at the bottle that the bartender still hadn't removed from the bar.


"No, I don't think I have," he said. "I'll take one of those."


"Straight?" asked My Bartender.


"Is that how you're drinking it?" he asked me. I nodded and held up my glass.


My Bartender poured him a glass and put the bottle back on the shelf, but not too far away. We toasted. The band came out and started to play.


I tapped my foot and sang along when I knew the words. My husband's best friend had been in this band before he moved away, so I was familiar with a lot of the songs.


"I like their sound," he said. "It's very original."


"The singer's got a lot of passion. I think that's my favorite part," I replied.


He stood next to me at the bar until intermission. The couple that had been sitting at the small table behind us paid their tab and left. "Would you like to move over to that table?" he asked.


"Sure."


My Bartender, the reason I loved that bar so much, brought the bottle over and refilled our glasses. He paid for my glass as well as his.


I felt so relaxed in his company. Surely, we had never met before, but I felt like he could be a close friend. Maybe he could even be a lover, if I wasn't married. As the band played their second half, I started to reconsider the if-I-wasn't-married part.


Our hands touched over the table, and neither of us moved away. After a few minutes of awkward immobility, he finally rested his hand on top of mine, essentially holding it. I fearfully realized that I was falling in love with him. He looked into my eyes. I loved him. I was no longer afraid. I looped my pinky around his.


The band finished their second set and said their hellos as they passed me to refill their drinks. The crowd started paying their bills and filing out, even though the bar would be open for another hour yet.


"Would you like to take a walk?" he asked.


"Yes," I said, a little too eagerly.


I had my too-high heels off as we stepped out the door. He had to lean down even farther to kiss me. He didn't seem to mind.


Hand in hand, we walked down the trail that used to be railroad tracks. Time passed so quickly as we walked and talked that before long, we had reached the end of the trail. We continued on into the park and each took seats in a swing.


At first, we just sat and talked, but before long, the compulsion overtook me and I started to swing higher. He matched me, and we swung until the chains went slack and our stomachs sank. We floated back to the ground laughing.


Before my swing had stopped, he jumped out of his. I had never been good at that, so I dragged my feet over the gravel to slow my swing down. He grabbed the chains, making me swing right into him. With one fluid motion, his hands moved to my waist, and his lips to mine.


As we kissed, he let my swing go. I stood up and left it behind.


"I live not far from here," he said.


"Okay," I answered his unasked question.


His house felt familiar. It was small, yet stylishly decorated. It felt comfortable. He unlocked the door, and I drew him in for a kiss before he had the chance to swing it open. We stumbled into the house as one.


Still in each other's embrace, he led me down the hall, past the stairs, and into the living room. We collapsed together onto a chaise lounge.


Hungrily, his hands went up under my dress to my lower back. They were slightly cold on my skin, but it felt refreshing. I realized how flushed my skin was.


In one smooth motion, he pulled his sweater, and the tshirt underneath off over his head. I rested my hands on the front of his cool trim chest. There wasn't much hair on his chest, but I liked the smoothness.


He kissed me again, long, deep, and hard. I felt like I couldn't breathe, but it excited me. His excitement was obvious, and he seemed so hungry for my body. In my mind, I had already decided that I would give myself to him completely.


His lips went from mine, down over my chin, and all over my neck. When his breath hit my ear, I shivered in ticklish delight. He nipped at the skin on my neck, and I giggled.


It felt like we were going so fast, yet not fast enough. I yearned for him so bad. His teeth brushed the skin on my neck again, giving me a new round of goosebumps, and then his teeth sunk in.


They were so sharp. There was pain at first, and I liked it. Like giving blood to the Red Cross, the pain dissapated quickly. I started feeling light headed. Where was I? I remembered going to the bar, The Shiny Flyers were playing, I sat at the bar. I think I moved to a table, but I can't remember why. No one I knew was there, just a few acquaintances, and I walked home alone. Didn't I? But I'm not home, I thought...


Everything was getting so quiet. I was getting cold, but so sleepy...

I have been experimenting with writing very short erotic pieces (prose poems might be a good name for them). The following is a fragment from an unpublished novel, but I am wondering if it is possible to publish a great many short pieces and find an audience for them. Bernda is not a misprint. Her mother was dyslexic, and she will be the female lead if the series ever gets produced. [HR][/HR]

Bernda and I make love to one another. Make love as in emotional awe, feverish in limb and heart. We speak little, and pass easily from one kiss to another, one caress to another; each of us surprised by the very things we expect. My hand rests on the boundary of her buttock and thigh, hers on my chest with fingers extended into my underarm, then my hand beneath the swell of her breast, hers flat and warm below my belly button, then her fingers on the flesh beneath my scrotum, her index finger at the boundary of that crinkled flesh, her thumb above my penis. She frames my symmetry; her other hand makes warm circles above my pubic hair. I sink into reverie, rise into excitement, passive under her touch, comforted and stimulated. I let my jaw slacken, release tension in all my muscles. I burn brightly. I moan softly. Her mouth, wet and complex, is over mine. I breathe her breaths; we let the looseness of our cheeks accept the penetrations of tongues. I am lost, lost in the forest of the night; her hands clasp my face in a clumsy fever while her hips slide over mine with grace. My lips negotiate their surrender to hers; there is a crease in the smoothness of the sheet. I feel an impulse, no a pulse, a pressure, please, please let me touch you there, help me touch you there, there where I cannot quite reach, no, stop, no don’t stop. An animal roars in the night; there is heat in my loins; it boils in me; it churns and burns inside me then flows like ice and fire down a long channel into you.

[QUOTE=Backdoorman;277010]I think you have to come to a understanding with your wife of what is OK. You need to support each other in this issue. Myabe this could be an outline of disscusion.

[SIZE=5][B][URL="http://www.tri-ess.org/Wives_CDs_BofR.html"][COLOR=#ee82ee]http://www.tri-ess.org/Wives_CDs_BofR.html[/COLOR][/URL][/B][/SIZE][/QUOTE]

We could use more members on here. I can't get enough dick.It is free so why not ?A lot of people no longer show up in search.

I wanted to get any thoughts if any girls have tried a strapless dildo on a guy aside from a strap on? I wanted to purchase one to have my girl use on me but wanted general feedback on it.