bi married guys -- anyone have a regular "friend with benefits"?

[secret.bisexual]

Hi everyone, I'm just asking this question to see if bi attached / married guys prefer to have a long-term 1-on-1 with another guy, or if they like to just meet up randomly.

Myself, I have a "special friend", another married guy that I meet up with regularly. It has been about 3 years now. It's been very hot and erotic. Also, there's the knowledge that because it's just the 2 of us, there's less potential for risks.

Any thoughts?

[Realist]

I've always preferred LTRs, whether I was married, or not. I'm the kind of person who can't get into a relationship unless I know and trust a person. I need to know their quirks, interests, and desires, no matter what gender they are. A mutual interest and desire really has to be evident, before a relationship would be inviting to me.

In my youth, I had one anonymous encounter and, even though we both achieved our carnal goals, it was not a rewarding experience for me.

You are lucky to have that special connection with your lover.

[ncbike33]

i have had a couple over the years. mostly short lived, both were guys who wanted oral, but were self conscious about having a guy doing it. a regular friend would be my ideal due to safety and discretion concerns. making it happen is a whole other deal. ends up being easier to just hook up from time to time.

[53bimale]

Good sex........memorable sex is with someone who knows your favorite color.....yeah, a ltr is absolutely it. Not to say you could not add some friends in the mix.....but the best and safest sex is to find a partner who loves the same things you do.......a person you trust......and a person who leaves you completely fulfilled. That is hard to find and a quickie or a one night stand in my opinion does not do that. It could occur on a rare basis, but usually not.
It takes time to learn and know a lover and build the trust.
Have I done a quickie or one night stand? Yeah and it was good, but the best is with a like minded ltr or at least that is my opinion.
I will close with this......all sex is good, but some is better than others.......

[ZepZep]

Definitely agree that LTR is the way to go. Sometimes we dive straight in and have a hot time and on other occasions we lead up to it slowly, both knowing exactly how it will end up. Hell we even talk to each during or fun. :) It is so much easier to read the mood and pace the fun accordingly. Each to their own of course and I am not closed to casual encounters if they feel right.

[robert194811]

I would love to find a regular to play with,but its hard when your married and can't host,also during the weekdays.......but i'm still looking

[Argent 11]

I'm working on it ... still :tongue:

[pmg_ams01]

Hi - I've not been around on this site for a long time, but logged in tonight, saw this posting and wanted to approach it from a slightly different angle. I'm lucky to have had a couple of longer term relationships (i.e. in my case that means lasting several months), but whilst I've appreciated the positive aspects that go with them, I've found they seriously compromised my marriage. Now before anyone says "well any contact compromises marriage", I find it easier to distance the odd casual encounter from my married life, than when having got closer to another guy. My gut instinct is that if you are looking for a serious LTR with someone of the same sex, you need to seriously question whether to stay married. For me, two LTRs is one too many, in my own experience the other guy at some point loses out and it causes hurt all round. That's personal and I'm never going to say what is or isn't right for someone else. More than interested to hear anyone else's views on this...

[Abiguypilot]

I"d rather have a LTR with a like-minded married friend than anything short term. Much less chance of STD's and you can get it more often. I'v had one-offs with friends who freaked out after our one night of fun, and that is a drag. I don't have any one at this time, but I keep my eyes open...I really could use a blowjob buddy!

[Bisexual Explorer]

I've recently meet a guy with whom an LTR is definitely a possibility. We've been together a few times and I'm really hoping it works out. He's a really nice person and fabulous in the sack. Wished we lived about 30 minutes closer together than we do.
g

[mikey3000]

Although I agree that ANY contact can and does put a strain on the marriage, I still prefer a LTR relationship with one guy. That is what I have now, and it's lasted almost a year. The trick is to introduce him to your wife, let her approve him first. My guy really likes my wife, and she really likes him. They get along wonderfully, though she still has a bit of the insecurities. Now his partner? Well, he's having a tough time with it too. And believe it or not, my wife looks for ways to alieve his partner's worries. What I'm in is called a "closed loop relationship". Not ideal for everyone, but for us, certianly better than me going for randon, anonymous hook ups.

[chimpster]

I have an occasional "suck buddy", same guy but not too regular (wish it was more regular!):tongue:

[magari]

I started man2man with a good buddy 4 years ago, and we meet every couple months and often find time to play. He lives 2 hrs away, so its not a weekly afair.

Other than that I've met some very nice married guys locally who I chat with on the phone, and just have fun talking about mansex.

[mooon]

I've recently meet a guy with whom an LTR is definitely a possibility. We've been together a few times and I'm really hoping it works out. He's a really nice person and fabulous in the sack. Wished we lived about 30 minutes closer together than we do.
g

Me too. And that is what I want.
My wife knows all about it. It does not seem to be straining our marriage.

Quick hookups have little appeal to me. I want to get to know the guy and be friends, too.
He has a GF who knows, too. I hope we may all four get together for some social activites, too.

[rutemptedalso]

Me too. And that is what I want.
My wife knows all about it. It does not seem to be straining our marriage.

Quick hookups have little appeal to me. I want to get to know the guy and be friends, too.
He has a GF who knows, too. I hope we may all four get together for some social activites, too.

Had an relationship in the past. It was awsome but my consiece started getting to me. I'm in the process of coming out to my wife now. She's trying to except that I'm Bi and I'm greatful for that. She may never allow me to be with anyone again but at least I don't have to hide anymore. Of course the guy I was seeing doesn't agree with what I'm doing and he probably will never tell his wife. It's hard to walk away from that relationship but being honest is more important to me.

[TrimBeardHairyBod]

offers himself as a discreet friend with (ongoing) benefits.... :bigrin:

[indenver_indenver]

Absolutely the best. I am in one now and it is hot! My wife knows I am bi so I can host. He and I both know what nuances turn each other on the most and we use that knowledge to to get each other red hot.

I have had two other LTRs and they too were very hot. Sad thing is when it's over, finding another is very tough. craigslist is full of blow-and-go types. What a waste!

I hope my man stays for years. Imagine all the cum he can give me in two, three or four years! I love it!

[secret.bisexual]

Everyone's posted some good points ... I have to say that for us married guys it's not an easy path to follow.

My conscience really bothers me a lot about it. I felt like that person who said an anonymous encounter is easier because you can separate it from your personal life. You can "compartmentalize" it and just put it away. But with a LTR it's more difficult. Lots of questions have come up in my mind -- should I end my marriage over this? At what point is it too much of a burden for me to carry? Can I just leave the bi-life behind and just never have man-sex again?

Problem is my LTR friend is a FANTASTIC lover, also a devoted married family man. In essence, we have almost the perfect set-up. But it's tough on my conscience.

[JP1986UM]

I feel so....bizarre because I am out, my wife is ok with it, and I am looking for a LTR.

I can't imagine trying to sneak around having sex with a lover while wondering if I got my story straight, left something up on the computer that indicates I am having gay sex, to the horror of my spouse.

I don't think its worth ending a relationship for, but honesty takes a huge burden off your shoulders and you can live peacefully if done right. Its not that you are bisexual, its that you snuck around behind her back or his back doing it.

That's the killer. The infidelity.

[rtmac]

indenver_indenver....I am jealous! married here and it is very hard to find that regular guy. I am still looking and when I find the right guy I hope it lasts a looong time! I fantasize about sucking cock and swallowing cum every day!

[barry1953]

hi yes I have someone and we meet once aweek for great sex but time is to short with him just as it get joyable it time to go only an hour or so

[Guitarz133]

Having a LT FWB would be ideal. But, I think tough to juggle with family and marriage. Coming out to the wife is not an option. For me, a monthly meeting with someone in the same boat would work, for all the obvious reasons primarily less disease risk.

Oh well, still looking......... ;)

[citystyleguy]

i have been sitting here trying to think how i was going to respond to two other threads, finally decided i could handle this one better than the others...

from the first guy i was with, to the last, it is has always been a one-on-one ltr, no other guy even considered. i do not and have never, liked the one-night stand. i have had three thinking something would grow from it, and met with major heartbreak.

my last love lasted 12 years, before the woman who become my wife, during the dating and falling in love, and through the first years of my marriage. he and i tried to maintain it even after he fell hard for the woman that became his wife, but after the first year or so it was too obvious that she was an extremely possesive control freak, and that i was too much of a threat to what she sought; however, my guy only saw the good, made excuses for her behavior, etc. finally, he told me that they were going to move to colorado, but that our love would last; it didnt, but as that story would fill more pages than i care to dedicate to, soon it was over, and with it came all the loneliness, emptiness, pain, so on. then, about a little more than a year after that, i heard from another friend that he had died in a car accident. there was no one to turn to, no one that i felt would ever understand, so i did what all good men are taught, bear it like a man, tough it out.

damn, do i miss that guy, every damn second of my life, and will until i am no more. now that is about all i can deal with tonite...

[sandytoes]

Wish.... Been lookng for long but, nothing yet. It would be sweet to have someone sharing trust, common interests, with whom able to carry on conversations about this and that, and dive into sex play without reservations...
Oh well. Some day maybe.:suave:

[Pasadenacpl2]

Our ultimate goal is to find a third for a LTR with the both of us. We have run into a problem: Mrs. Pasa and I have different tastes in men! *shock*

Any guys out there under 45 into BBWs and hairy guys and looking for an LTR? :tong:

Pasa

[darkeyes]

Our ultimate goal is to find a third for a LTR with the both of us. We have run into a problem: Mrs. Pasa and I have different tastes in men! *shock*

Any guys out there under 45 into BBWs and hairy guys and looking for an LTR? :tong:

Pasa

You're not alone in having different tastes from your partner Pasa.. when I was still active in the Labour Party, a new woman member who was in a same sex relationship with another woman joined and I got to know her pretty well. She liked younger very smooth and fit nordic types and her partner tall rugged dark of her own age and older. She also fancied the rocks off tall muscular black men. They had been looking for suitable FWB's to suit both when I first met them and that was 3 years ago.. they are still looking.. although last time I spoke to her they had compromised and had had several encounters with compromise candidates which had so far been founding wanting.. I think the poor guys are still wanting but they aren't getting any more...

Kate by the way has no particular idea of what she fancies.. she just fancies owt under 40 thats fit, not foul mouthed, looks after himself, not too hairy and is intelligent.. no we don't have that kind of relationship as you know but no harm in drooling if you like that sort of thing.. I do enough over me own sex so can't grudge her her little pleasures.. in the days when I was interested in lesser mortals I had similar tastes to her so I reckon we could probably work something out if we ever embarked on that road.. but am spoiled by the vision of JD and no man can hold a candle to him for me, apart from maybe Kaka in the World Cup .. a candle maybe so he can find his way round the bedroom in the dark maybe but in no other way...

Its if I could somehow persuade her to have a mutal FWB who was female I would have trouble.. THERE we have very different tastes indeed...

[CuddlyKate]

And what do I end up with? A spoilt, four foot nothing, scrawny, argumentative, profligate, clothes hanger! What I did that was so sinful in a previous life to deserve this I don't know.:(

[darkeyes]

And what do I end up with? A spoilt, four foot nothing, scrawny, argumentative, profligate, clothes hanger! What I did that was so sinful in a previous life to deserve this I don't know.:(

..am not 4' nuthin.. cow!!! :tong:

[BiCplAz]

I don't know if I'm lucky or not but I have 3 "friends" one I have known for 25+ years, and have been having sex with him all along, and two others from this site. We get together about once a month and have lunch then get a motel room and have a fun afternoon. You have seen the pics on here of our get togethers. I think it's fun to have a bunch of married guys with the same way of thinking. No emotional stuff just good old fashoned MMMM sex. There's nothing better than making a good friend cum really hard and good. Makes all involved feel good.

[mooon]

Oh yeah!

A regular guy is the best. Preferrably another bi married guy.
I find the quick hookup thing kind of empy.

[Rick02724]

Hi everyone, I'm just asking this question to see if bi attached / married guys prefer to have a long-term 1-on-1 with another guy, or if they like to just meet up randomly.

Myself, I have a "special friend", another married guy that I meet up with regularly. It has been about 3 years now. It's been very hot and erotic. Also, there's the knowledge that because it's just the 2 of us, there's less potential for risks.

Any thoughts?

I prefer a LTR. Sex with a friend is always best :) It also does cut down on the risks that is for sure. I would like to find a married friend for a LTR.

There was a group on yahoo called "Closed Loop" cant seem to find it anymore. Anyone know of that group and what happened to it?

[void()]

Wow, more people than I thought enjoy long term relationships. I do as well. Although, I have had about three quickies. Enjoyed great fucking but ... yeah they rang hollow.

[Conran]

I know from the male perspective most seem to want a regular close friend with the added benefits of discreet fun.

Most of the straight or bi members of B8M8 seem to be seeking close friends rather than one-off meets.

[Realist]

Never had a one-night stand with a guy, or sex with anyone I didn't know well and trust beforehand. I am one of those who cannot get into mindless, anonymous, sex, then fly. Mutual interests, communication, and knowledge, that will ensure I know how to please someone....and for them to please me, is more important than a quick orgasm.

[NjbiGuy01]

I don't, as I have primarily always gravitated towards MF couples. I enjoy threesomes with a man and woman involved. Honestly, recent events (marital drama, with people I thought were the nicest partners I'd ever met in 30 years of swinging) has made me seriously rethink my position. I'm now more open to finding a male best bud, for something steady. I would even consider a MM couple the more I think about it...

In the case of couples: be careful what you wish for, you just might get it, and then realize it scares ya...

[biseeker]

For me the ideal would be another married guy in a regular relationship with both our wives knowing and approving. Anyone have this? How did you get to that point?

[Billy T]

Having a friend with benefits is the best sometime he's top somtime I am. We play we have fun Sometime we just hang out and enjoy each other
I adore his wife and they are going to meet my girl in a few days.
I've had one night hook ups and I really think I'm a better lover when I understand what my lover wants from just knowing what turns em on
and lets not forget STDs it can be a dangerous world out that
Be careful
Have fun:

[Jexplore]

in my dreams....that would be great......something to really look forward on a regular basis.......

[corsairf4u]

Add me to the looking for LTR. There are lots of one night opportunities and with stds and the like that is not what i am looking for. I was with a married couple for over a year. Sometime she would play sometimes not. When she did it was added bonus, when not, it was great too. Unfortunately they retired and moved. My ideal situation would to have a FWB relationship that could grow and last.

[ashleycd]

LTR only, everything else is just too dangerous and too hollow. I have a great marriage and a wife that is fine with my sexuality (still disclosing, understanding, etc.) and just don't want to taint that with random hook ups.

[ross j]

I love sucking cock that my wife fucks

[danreidbarmi]

Okay, as I've been so isolated in my little bi world for so long, I'm embarrassed to say that I don't know the vernacular. I just figured out what "friend with benefits" must mean. Where can I get a glossary for LTR and other abbreviations? I know what Fuck Buddy means...

Anyway, I had one longterm relationship years ago. I wrote about him in my book. While we were both quite naive in the skills of homosexual love-making, I found myself becoming emotionally attached to him. Then, when he saw me with my baby son, he cooled and stopped calling. That was kinda tuff for me. Since then, it's all been casual and pretty much nameless, until a few months ago, when I was out of town at a conference and picked up another married, bi guy in a hotel bar. The feelings I had that night, naked in his room, changed everything for me. I haven't had much desire for a quickie, anonymous encounter since.

Now, I think I'd like to have a recurring relationship with a clean, safe couple for fun. But, I'm open to taking a male relationship one step at a time. I certainly don't want to hurt somebody or get myself hurt due to unexpected emotional attachments.

[abstruse_ric]

There was a group on yahoo called "Closed Loop" cant seem to find it anymore. Anyone know of that group and what happened to it?

I know the club you're talking about. It's a rather large group devoted to closed loop relationships. I think there was even a California Bay Area subgroup. Here's the link: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Closed-Loop/

I agree with everyone...LTR or at least knowing the person well enough to trust him.

[artman]

I have 2 "friends with benefits". Like me, they're both bi and married and none of our partners are aware. One is a top and more dominant, he likes to take my arse on a regular basis, after spanking or whipping it. The other is quite shy and definately not into the kissing, cuddling scene. He just wants me to blow him off, which i do every few weeks. He doesn't play anywhere else and I know he's clean, so i can take his load in my mouth. There's no emotional attachment to either men; it's purely an arrangement whereby we all get what we want, regularly and disctretely.

[ubetcha]

I have had several "hook ups" with different men and women but that's all they ever seem to be...just a quickie and they are gone. I would love to find a married someone close by to have a LTR with. It makes things so less complicated and yes the worries of STD's is removed. It just seems that being able to find that "special" someone is more difficult then most people think. It's hard enough to find that someone of the opposite sex, but it seems even harder to find that someone of the same sex. I haven't found that someone yet but I'll keep looking! Any volunteers?!:three:

[boca.openminded]

working on it too but its so difficult finding someone that you click with.

I've tried everything but I am still looking. I never thought it would be this tough...

[luvsgirlyclothes]

I would love to have a freind with benefits, but for now I have to live with an occasional stranger hook up

[danreidbarmi]

I have to say that for us married guys it's not an easy path to follow.Lots of questions have come up in my mind -- should I end my marriage over this? At what point is it too much of a burden for me to carry? Can I just leave the bi-life behind and just never have man-sex again?

Two weeks ago, I shared these same questions. Now, after finally fessin' up, it looks as tho my marriage of over 20 years is over. I treasure my marriage and my family. Yet, because I was unable to resist the urge to have sex with men, and I could no longer lie to myself or my wife about it, I have caused immeasurable injury -- and I want to die. I haven't had a hard-on since I told my wife that I'm bi. She is grieving, I am no longer welcome in our bed, and I've pledged celibacy (easy, when you don't have an erection) as long as I remain in our beautiful house.

That being said, I have no idea what LTR stands for, but decades ago, when I was in my 20s, I did have a long-term, occasional relationship with a very powerful, rich executive. It was fun at first; then, I started to get emotionally involved. When he saw me with my toddler son, he never called again. That hurt. After that, I went "straight" for about 8 yrs, and I haven't had a regular male relationship since. Since my bi-nature returned, it's all been casual and anonymous. I would like to have a hot fuck buddy, someone I know I can trust. I've been careless and foolish in my compulsive encounters. It's time for me (regardless of the regrettable end to my marriage) to be more sensible and cautious, and maybe even experience some genuine communication and passion (rather than those blow-and-go, cum-and-zip things).

[Sourdough]

My wife and I have been married for 33 years. During that time we have been swingers, off and on. Early on I requested she give me half of what she got when performing oral on me. So when she did the same with one of her other lovers, she would turn and giveme a kiss and give me half. One day while a friend and I was taking turns with her I mentioned to her that I would like to suck the guy, so she asked him if I could. That broke the ice so to speak and she knew I was Bi.

From that point on I have had many male partners, but I always make sure she meets them and approves first, before I start a relationship with a guy. The knid of guys I like are ones that become friends and like to hang out togeather. We often go on trips where we are camping out, and that has it's benifits. Or we just hang out at our house and watch movies, or just general talk. If the mood hits, we move up stairs, or just hit the sofa. If the wife is in the mood she will join in. Sometimes she just watches, or she moves to another part of the house. She says what we each do is our own business, just don't hide it from the other. Be open about our feeling and actions.

[NjbiGuy01]

I played bi with friends as a teen, while dating girls. I decided bi was for me. I've played w/m-f couples mostly since. While I prefer to live a conventional life, I do stay open minded to MM play or MFM encounters. I did enjoy anonymous sex with girls for years before marriage. Met my share as a musician, got laid, got paid, all good. I had two or three glory hole experiences as a teen. Mostly curiousity and eroticism kicking in...They were very hot, and remain a very hot memory I can always get aroused from. I wouldn't do it again in this world.. I never really had any male male experiences after my teen years. I sought out and found MF couples with whom I had multi-year relationships in most cases. Today, besides disease, as I got older I simply realized I actually wanted a true relationship and a close bond with my partners. I've had offers on vacation (in spas) and although tempting, I passed.

Recent frustrations with finding couples made me decide it might be time to revisit the idea of MM play. If I could find a local friend with benefits, married (with as much to protect as I do), I would now certainly consider it. Always thought playing with the right MM couple would be hot too. I've attended a few male parties at homes or hotels, but being uber-disease concerned has made me just a watcher and toucher. I would only have sex of any kind if I knew the person well enough to feel totally safe.

Maybe time to rewrite my profile.. :bigrin:

[NJbimale]

Yes, I am lucky enough to say that I have a friend who I see regularly. Maybe not enough but when we can.;)
He's become a good, trusted friend. He has all the qualities one would want, not only in a fuck buddy, but in a true friend.
The fact that I am married and share not only the details of my encounters but sometimes the encounters as well with her means that anyone involved with me needs to be respectful and beyond courteous to my wife.
Some dudes don't get that. Thankfully, my LTR knows this and fits nicely right in between us. Mmm....it's very very good.

[danreidbarmi]

Yes, I am lucky enough to say that I have a friend who I see regularly. Maybe not enough but when we can.;)
He's become a good, trusted friend. He has all the qualities one would want, not only in a fuck buddy, but in a true friend.
The fact that I am married and share not only the details of my encounters but sometimes the encounters as well with her means that anyone involved with me needs to be respectful and beyond courteous to my wife.
Some dudes don't get that. Thankfully, my LTR knows this and fits nicely right in between us. Mmm....it's very very good.

Very, very good, indeed. I envy this brand of candor, honesty, and generosity between partners. Unfortunately, this kind of openness is not possible in my marriage. So, although I feel ready for a steady fuck-buddy, that imaginary relationship will have to wait, while I sort out what's left of my seemingly-shattered marriage.

[adamandjulia]

Yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!. My Wife

[lamplighter]

Hello,

I am a new member and this is my first post.

I had a steady male friend with benefits for about 2 years. We did alot of things together. We would go for long walks and talk about each others lives and family. He had children and I don't. We went fishing together at a cabin in northeastern P.A. a few times. For about 2 years we were enjoying each other and we were workout buddies. We would get together for lunch occassionally and his wife and mine became friends as well. We would do things as couples ( non-sexual ) festivals and dinner out etc. That lasted about as I said a little over 2 years. I can see where a long term relationship would be the way to go if it weren't for one thing. I was coming out to my wife at the time and I was really finding sex with other men to be hotte and more intense than I had ever had with women. I was actually seeing my one buddy alot but still seeing other guys for one timers or repeat visists 2 or 3 times and then moving on. Now because of certain events in my life I am in a long dry spell. Longing for the touch of another man and can only look.

I think for me as long as the sex is healthy,clean,agreeable and most of all a hell of alot of fun. I think it is okay either way!!!!:male:

[secret.bisexual]

Thanks to everyone who responded to my original post. I started this thread as a way to satisfy my curiosity as to how many married guys might consider having a sensual, "closed" relationship with another married guy. I know there's been lots of different answers -- we all have different needs and situations.

In my case, I suppose I have a pretty good set-up. I am in a "closed loop" with two other married guys (I'll call "K" and "S"). We are all similar ages (around 40) and similar interests: working out, jogging, music, wine, movies, etc. We're able to relate on different levels. We meet occasionally for sex, but it's in secret. Our wives don't know about it.

K is good friends with S in general -- they hang out together, they go out on dates as couples with the wives. They're all friends.

I am more reserved -- I haven't met the wives. My wife hasn't met K or S. I prefer to keep things a bit more arms-length that way. In a social way, I've hung out with K & S over coffee, or gone for workouts to the gym with them.

The main reason we are drawn to each other is because we all give each other the sexual satisfaction that we crave. I know it's not morally correct. I carry a lot of guilt about it. But at the same time, I think it helps keep my sanity.

Between the 3 of us, we all value our marriages and our families -- the sex is only that -- just sex. We all have different issues with our wives with regards to sex, but none of us have found an answer. So this is the arrangement we've come up with. I know it's bad. But I've made the choice to live with it.

At the same time, it's been "liberating". I have finally been able to express myself as a healthy, fun, sensual bisexual man. My experiences with K & S have been incredibly sensual and hot.

[Jimbo712]

No, but I would love to have one.

[BiBIKER065]

I would love to have a ltr with another married guy, that each of us could please each other with our cock desires. It would be a fantasy cum true.

[Gr8Butt4U]

Had a fantastic relationship with a friend for a couple of years. Almost a story book type relationship. We had some really great times together. Everything about us just clicked. Everything was great up till a few months ago when his company down sized and he had to make a choice to either transfer to another location or get laid off. Being a family man himself, laid off wasn't the answer. So he took the transfer which I can't blame him...Sure have missed him and our great times we had....
Now just wondering if anything like we had will happen again...

[Texian]

Hello. Yes, I now have a special friend with benefits. In fact, I refer to him in private as "my boyfriend".

Search my previous posts for background. We started seeing in other in April of this year.

I will tell you it took me YEARS to find Kyle. Lots of A4A ads, Craigslist, here, etc. And, I answered lots of other ads. Only two others turned into actual meetings, and both of those did not work out.

Kyle is different, and we've really hit it off. We have become lovers AND friends. And, there's no pressure...we meet when we meet, if we can meet. So far, our time together has been lunch time hotel meets, but we're going to plan on arranging a trip this fall.

Take your time. Finding the right person is critical. Someone you can trust, someone you can care for, someone you can let go with....

Good luck!

[MyTimeNow]

Pretty much agree with the majority of the other posts. Ideally would like to find someone regular, to meet up with on occasion when the urges come up. Being attached, I don't like to take chances. It would be also nice to just have a friend, who I happen to fool around with and talk about things to. Someone who's also attached/married is great since the discretion is on the same level. Chemistry goes a long way (and helps), so random hookups even if they're safe are not as nice as someone you already have a rapport with sexually. Also, I'd feel more inclined to do things with someone I trust as a regular hookup, as opposed to someone random......because you never know what they carry, and it's best not to take chances like that these days - especially when you're already involved with someone else.

[ShavedBalzz]

Have a "friend with benefits" that i've seen off an on for 20 years. See him a few times a year anymore. Works for both of us.

[notquitewt]

I wish

[heefnut]

I have had one of those for almost a year now, and it is very nice! The randoms can be fun too..but it's not the same.

[The Bisexual Virgin]

Oh wow, this thread makes me feel sad for the unsuspecting wives at home that get cheated on. Surely they don't deserve such treatment.

[Alloiledup]

Hi everyone, I'm just asking this question to see if bi attached / married guys prefer to have a long-term 1-on-1 with another guy, or if they like to just meet up randomly.

Myself, I have a "special friend", another married guy that I meet up with regularly. It has been about 3 years now. It's been very hot and erotic. Also, there's the knowledge that because it's just the 2 of us, there's less potential for risks.

Any thoughts?

I also have a 'special' friend. I've been with him coming up 7 years. We are in such a strong relationship. He is the top in the relationship and I am the bottom. It worked out really well. Even though we have the most amazing sex, our sex is 2D. We like to make it 3D or 4D, to escalate it to an even higher level, with the addition of a 3rd or even 4th. I have never had better sex. It's been an amazing journey.

[Alloiledup]

Oh wow, this thread makes me feel sad for the unsuspecting wives at home that get cheated on. Surely they don't deserve such treatment.

Women after child birth or menupause sometimes are no longer interested in sex or do not have a strong desire for sex. I don't know but that's what I was told. Men often like sex just for recreation with no intention to fall in love. That's why men are from Mars and women from Venus. We are made differently. Men cheating on their wives not for other women. They need male bonding which a woman cannot give them. As for my relationship with my 'special friend', he is not interested to fool around behind his wife with another woman. He didn't need another woman. He is interested in sex with men. It's different. The same sex knows what the same sex needs. He is having sex with men for what a woman could not provide him. It's a diversion.

[The Bisexual Virgin]

Women after child birth or menupause sometimes are no longer interested in sex or do not have a strong desire for sex. I don't know but that's what I was told. Men often like sex just for recreation with no intention to fall in love. That's why men are from Mars and women from Venus. We are made differently. Men cheating on their wives not for other women. They need male bonding which a woman cannot give them. As for my relationship with my 'special friend', he is not interested to fool around behind his wife with another woman. He didn't need another woman. He is interested in sex with men. It's different. The same sex knows what the same sex needs. He is having sex with men for what a woman could not provide him. It's a diversion.

What you just said did not help matters.It only further proved my opinions, and judgements.I pretty sure you are happy in your relationship,because you are with another man.So of course you two would have the perfect sex lives, and perfect relationship. And just because a woman was born without a dick does not mean that she deserves to get cheated by her heartless husband. It's not right.And do your friends wife a favor and tell her to divorce her husband, if she does not know that her husband is GAY.Please make it known that her husband is GAY soon please.And if women are so fucking terrible at sex, then these men should not pursue a relationship with a woman.

And again like I said earlier.These women do not deserve to be cheated on,just for the mere fact she's a woman.Cheating is bad,but somehow in my opinion(Yes I am going to say it,and people can get mad at me all they want to, and I won't take it back) it's waaaaaaaayyyyyyyyy, ten times, worse for a woman to be cheated on by her husband with another man.And I know with you being a gay man you could care less about a woman, but it hurts just in case you did not know.

[tenni]

BV
I do not know what these women deserves and nor do you.

Cheating is bad. That is not the topic of this thread.

I've read several posts and none referred to cheating. You do not know what arrangements have been agreed to.

You are off topic.

You do not seem to like men very much. The question is to bi married guys. You are not a guy. You are not married. This thread is not for you. Show some respect for bi men that you know nothing about.

[The Bisexual Virgin]

Tenni. I am reading the thread correctly. Granted some did not say no such thing but I am talking the others. And what makes you think I dislike men? I have a very strong male influence in my life,so you thinking that I hate men is absurd.

[The Bisexual Virgin]

And if you would have notice I was not speaking for the bi men, I would never do that. I was speaking for the women.

[tenni]

And if you would have notice I was not speaking for the bi men, I would never do that. I was speaking for the women.

Are you not posting for yourself? You do not represent women.

This thread is about bi married men and their regular friends with benefits. It is not cheating or women. Start your own thread on those topics.

Your postings continue to follow a troll like practice attempting to take threads off topic. Your posts indicate a distrust of men and a dislike of bimen imo.

Your posting behaviour on this thread is equivalent to a man going posting on the women and porn thread posting some off topic comment when the thread is intended for women and not men.

[Vuillardgr]

Women after child birth or menupause sometimes are no longer interested in sex or do not have a strong desire for sex. I don't know but that's what I was told. Men often like sex just for recreation with no intention to fall in love. That's why men are from Mars and women from Venus. We are made differently. Men cheating on their wives not for other women. They need male bonding which a woman cannot give them. As for my relationship with my 'special friend', he is not interested to fool around behind his wife with another woman. He didn't need another woman. He is interested in sex with men. It's different. The same sex knows what the same sex needs. He is having sex with men for what a woman could not provide him. It's a diversion.


Ok, I have to say something about your post. I completely understand your need to be with other men. So that isn't the issue. There are many posts detailing how women freak out when they find out that their men are involved with other men....how the women have all of these unfounded fears about their husbands leaving them, contracting a disease, having their lives hijacked by a man that never truly loved them, wondering if they are lacking in some way, etc etc.

Many bisexual men are open and upfront about their sexuality and needs before they get serious with a woman or when they discover their feelings toward men after they have established a relationship with her. They love her and want her to know who they truly are and more times than not ,want her to participate in that part of their lives. Guys with your approach make it harder for honest men who want to have a woman in their lives. I've read so many posts on here about men who are open and honest from the beginning or as soon as they discover who they truly are and they catch major hell. Why? Because there are women out their with husbands or lovers that have treated them in the manner that you have described. Trust me when I tell you, most women don't want choice taken away from them...especially when it comes to who they share their lives with. With choice comes freedom. A guy's fear of rejection, potential change of family dynamic, etc.. doesn't trump honesty. I truly believe honesty leads to freedom for all involved. It is an absolute right for us all to decide what life we lead and with whom we take that journey with. How insulting and board line misogynistic. You have listed some lame excuses in order to get away with living a lie and being a cheater. There is absolutely no excuse for women to be marginalized and relegated to little more than a sexless, emotionally compromised heap that has little concern for her man's sexual needs. Most women don't fall into those categories and for the small percentage that do.... they still deserve the truth. If we are to be in relationships, we deserve respect and we have to give it.

So a bi guy has a right to complain about women with unfounded negative ideas about bi men when he is honest about who he is, but if someone with your point of view thinks to voice your opinion on it, I do suggest you keep it to yourself.

[The Bisexual Virgin]

Are you not posting for yourself? You do not represent women.

This thread is about bi married men and their regular friends with benefits. It is not cheating or women. Start your own thread on those topics.

Your postings continue to follow a troll like practice attempting to take threads off topic. Your posts indicate a distrust of men and a dislike of bimen imo.

Your posting behaviour on this thread is equivalent to a man going posting on the women and porn thread posting some off topic comment when the thread is intended for women and not men.

UMMMMMM Tenni re-read what you just wrote.Some of these men have fwb, on the side without their wives knowing,so therefore some of thse guys are having with another man.And believe me I am no troll. And, yes I have a distrust of men, and especially bi men,shouldn't every self-respecting woman feel the the same?

[The Bisexual Virgin]

Ok, I have to say something about your post. I completely understand your need to be with other men. So that isn't the issue. There are many posts detailing how women freak out when they find out that their men are involved with other men....how the women have all of these unfounded fears about their husbands leaving them, contracting a disease, having their lives hijacked by a man that never truly loved them, wondering if they are lacking in some way, etc etc.

Many bisexual men are open and upfront about their sexuality and needs before they get serious with a woman or when they discover their feelings toward men after they have established a relationship with her. They love her and want her to know who they truly are and more times than not ,want her to participate in that part of their lives. Guys with your approach make it harder for honest men who want to have a woman in their lives. I've read so many posts on here about men who are open and honest from the beginning or as soon as they discover who they truly are and they catch major hell. Why? Because there are women out their with husbands or lovers that have treated them in the manner that you have described. Trust me when I tell you, most women don't want choice taken away from them...especially when it comes to who they share their lives with. With choice comes freedom. A guy's fear of rejection, potential change of family dynamic, etc.. doesn't trump honesty. I truly believe honesty leads to freedom for all involved. It is an absolute right for us all to decide what life we lead and with whom we take that journey with. How insulting and board line misogynistic. You have listed some lame excuses in order to get away with living a lie and being a cheater. There is absolutely no excuse for women to be marginalized and relegated to little more than a sexless, emotionally compromised heap that has little concern for her man's sexual needs. Most women don't fall into those categories and for the small percentage that do.... they still deserve the truth. If we are to be in relationships, we deserve respect and we have to give it.

So a bi guy has a right to complain about women with unfounded negative ideas about bi men when he is honest about who he is, but if someone with your point of view thinks to voice your opinion on it, I do suggest you keep it to yourself.

I thought I was the only one who had a problem with his post. I agree with you 110% that he can represent what women think of bisexual men.

[Gearbox]

So a bi guy has a right to complain about women with unfounded negative ideas about bi men when he is honest about who he is, but if someone with your point of view thinks to voice your opinion on it, I do suggest you keep it to yourself.
Wait a mo! Your here to learn about bi males for your friend, but if they don't say what you want to hear, you tell them to shut up?
Alloiledup posted a pretty accurate account of why SOME bi males who cheat, don't even consider it to be cheating. It's not exscusing or denying anything! It's just how SOME think. Sex IS recreational, and even though trust isn't as trivial, to many there's just nothing to declare that their partner would understand.

[tenni]

Wait a mo! Your here to learn about bi males for your friend, but if they don't say what you want to hear, you tell them to shut up?
Alloiledup posted a pretty accurate account of why SOME bi males who cheat, don't even consider it to be cheating. It's not exscusing or denying anything! It's just how SOME think. Sex IS recreational, and even though trust isn't as trivial, to many there's just nothing to declare that their partner would understand.

I agree with you Gear. Alloiledup has reported about the section of men who turn to men due to their female partner refusing to have sex. I've met middle aged men who are in sexless marriages where they have not had sex with their female partner for seven to ten years. Sexually, the marriage is dead but the relationship is otherwise working for both of them. Their relationship works for them as long as the woman doesn't have to have sex or talk about the lack of sex in their twenty to thirty year relationship.

Again though, this thread is not about why. If it was about why, the why is why do men feel that they need a friend with benefits? The OP makes no reference to his status. He makes reference that he believes that having a friend with benefits is safer and that he had a friend with benefit relationship for three years. I agree with him.

Judging females and males need not apply. There is enough judgment about bisexuals from heteros, asexuals and gays away from a bisexual site.

[darkeyes]

What do these women think? Do they believe that their men are just like them and the men have no interest in sex anymore for seven or more years?
Some men turn to other men for physical sexual release rather than another woman. Right or wrong, they consider that a better solution not to involve another woman. Vuil needs to put that in her thinking cap. If she is here to learn and not be a troll just accept what you are told. There is no need for judgement. She is correct that it would be best if both partners were honest with each other. Their relationship works for them as long as the woman doesn't have to have sex or talk about the lack of sex in their twenty to thirty year relationship.

I know being a man is your chief interest tenni.. but it isn't all a one way street.. there are as many women, highly sexed and eager for their shag, whose man has as much interest in having sex with her than he has with the family dog. (ok I know there are some who dont mind it with the family dog.. but u know what I mean)..

...u make it sound that women become crusty dried up old bags at a certain age which for many just isn't the case.. for most I would argue.. what people do is for them to decide, and women are no less randy than men in general at any age and at times in their lives often a bloody sight more so.. I have no idea how I would react if my sex life dried up but I am sure as hell positive I would be less than happy and a promise I am determined to keep would be under even more stress than it is now... I need more than my own fingers to keep me happy.. and even Rog and Sybina and their chums could not entirely comfort me.. and Kate is a pretty highly sexed girl too.. she may prefer monogamy but I know only too well her principles would be under severe strain if I went off my frequent and regular bowls of oats.. .so I understand what you are saying and sympathise with any man who isn't getting it at home as I do any woman no matter the gender of her partner...

I know the title of the thread is about men but sometimes on this site we are too male oriented and so much applies to both genders... this subject is one.

[tenni]

That is all fine for you darkeyes. It has nothing to do with the ideas behind this post.

Clearly not all women become dried up hags in their older years. Some do. It is their male partner that is seeking a friend with benefits situation.

[darkeyes]

That is all fine for you darkeyes. It has nothing to do with the ideas behind this post.

Clearly not all women become dried up hags in their older years. Some do. It is their male partner that is seeking a friend with benefits situation.
ahh but it does tenni babes.. u r just too blind 2 c it...;)

[tenni]

As I have posted before, this is not a safe site for bisexual men to discuss their sexuality and needs. Women seem to believe that they may interject on any thread and make judgments and insults. I'm not too blind babes. It is different perspectives. Your comments have nothing to do with a man's desire for a friend with benefits. They might have something to do with a woman's lack of desire to have a friend with benefits with another woman or desire to have a friend with benefits period.

[Neonaught]

I am 49 and have been out to my very understanding wife for a little over ten years now. I have been looking for the kind of LTR male lover for the better part of 15 years and simpely never had any luck. While I have enjoyed the occassional brief encounter they leave me cold. I need to get to know a person, male or female, and actually like them for intimacy to be fulfilling for me. I guess that's a big impediment in my search. Also, as I'll bet we have all experienced, there is a ton of flakey people in this world. Even after I came out to her I often didn't discuss proposed meetings that were planned with her because so many of them simply evaporated without any result. We talk about every one now, not that there are very many to discuss, and she gives me moral-boosting support. I live in the 4th largest city in the US and I'm still trying to understand why what I seek is so damned elusive.

[darkeyes]

As I have posted before, this is not a safe site for bisexual men to discuss their sexuality and needs. Women seem to believe that they may interject on any thread and make judgments and insults. I'm not too blind babes. It is different perspectives. Your comments have nothing to do with a man's desire for a friend with benefits. They might have something to do with a woman's lack of desire to have a friend with benefits with another woman or desire to have a friend with benefits period.
*laffs*.. right tenni have it ur own way.. its rubbish, but u believe it, so it must be right... ;)

[Vuillardgr]

There is no need for me to rehash my last post. I addressed the issues to Alloiledup's post that deeply underestimates a large percentage of the female population. We all should be honest about what we want and need and there is not excuse for cheating and marginalizing a partner with whom you are sharing a life . FACT: It takes two people to make a relationship work. We have a duty to a partner to be honest and open about who we are and what activities we engage. NO IDEOLOGY TRUMPS THAT. I know there are people that post on a daily basis and smack down anything that goes against their one-sided view. That's just status quo here. I equate that behavior to cramps. You know that ridiculousness is coming but it can be put in its place.

[Gearbox]

Vuillardgr if you only listen to yourself, that's all your going to get. But let me whisper into that tight little straightjacket of denial: "That's not the ideology of the cheaters! Monogamy has never trumped what it created".;)

[Vuillardgr]

Vuillardgr if you only listen to yourself, that's all your going to get. But let me whisper into that tight little straightjacket of denial: "That's not the ideology of the cheaters! Monogamy has never trumped what it created".;)

Aren't you cute. Before you wink too hard, let me inform you of something. I never said monogamy trumped anything. This isn't about monogamy.Your daily attempts at twisting other people's words to suit your agenda are somewhat comical and completely trite. I said honesty is of the utmost importance in any relationship. Whether it be mono, poly, hetero, bi, etc... I've said this numerous times. You just choose to believe or pretend to believe that I am insinuating monogamy is for everyone. Someone's relationship dynamic is irrelevant as far as I am concerned. We all have to live our lives how we see fit. However, it is important to inform our partner of who we are and what we are doing! No amount of verbal gymnastics is going to negate that fact. Being open and honest is something we have to do in any relationship. There is no excuse for lies and cheating. A whisper for you: Skewed opinion, fear, and selfishness shouldn't impede on a partner's need to know.

[Gearbox]

Aren't you cute. Before you wink too hard, let me inform you of something. I never said monogamy trumped anything. This isn't about monogamy.Your daily attempts at twisting other people's words to suit your agenda are somewhat comical and completely trite. I said honesty is of the utmost importance in any relationship. Whether it be mono, poly, hetero, bi, etc... I've said this numerous times. You just choose to believe or pretend to believe that I am insinuating monogamy is for everyone. Someone's relationship dynamic is irrelevant as far as I am concerned. We all have to live our lives how we see fit. However, it is important to inform our partner of who we are and what we are doing! No amount of verbal gymnastics is going to negate that fact. Being open and honest is something we have to do in any relationship. There is no excuse for lies and cheating. A whisper for you: Skewed opinion, fear, and selfishness shouldn't impede on a partner's need to know.
Well that's marvelous that monogamy is out of the way. I agree that honesty is the most important thing too, and neither partner should feel they need to lie or withhold the truth from the other etc. Unfortunatly that isn't always the case in every situation, and despite our best intentions we err, and we make do with fuzzy logic.
Why that's not prevented right at the start of the relationship is beyond me. But it happens still.

You realy got this ideology thing about cheating and lying all messed up. I'd advise listening to the cheaters, and those who explain different perceptions to you, but you need to quit trying to bully people into silence for that to work. Your judging something that your not prepared to understand. That's just blind denial and utterly snide of you.
Try the truth, it'll set you free.;)

[tenni]

Its sad how "some women" think that their words are needed on a thread like this. Only one post in the past 26 posts are actually on topic of the thread...The others are from women who feel the urgency to make some off topic statement about men or men countering them (including my posts) ........FEK :(

[Vuillardgr]

[QUOTE=Gearbox;236619]Well that's marvelous that monogamy is out of the way. I agree that honesty is the most important thing too, and neither partner should feel they need to lie or withhold the truth from the other etc. Unfortunatly that isn't always the case in every situation, and despite our best intentions we err, and we make do with fuzzy logic.
Why that's not prevented right at the start of the relationship is beyond me. But it happens still.

You realy got this ideology thing about cheating and lying all messed up. I'd advise listening to the cheaters, and those who explain different perceptions to you, but you need to quit trying to bully people into silence for that to work. Your judging something that your not prepared to understand. That's just blind denial and utterly snide of you.
Try the truth, it'll set you free.;)[/QUOTE}

Let's just get this bullying nonsense done with now... You and a few others are the bullies on this site. Everyday, you pounce on people who don't agree with your point of view. So your distraction tactic of accusing me of something you practice without fail is insane. Telling the plain truth isn't bullying.

Now, we all have different perceptions of the truth in certain situations. And yes, it would be so much easier for us to split hairs and give half truths or none at all in order to square away our actions. Problem with that is when it comes to our partner, it is completely disrespectful to sell them short and lie about who we are and what we do. Now you can call me whatever you like, but it still doesn't erase the need for honesty and communication in relationships.

The truth will set us all free?!! Really, I wasn't aware of that fact... wait a second.. actually I AM!! That's what I've been posting all day. You are the one offering excuses as to why to keep secrets and cheat.

What's next? Oh , sometimes its easier on the partner to not know. Who are we to assume for anyone what's best for them? Yeah its easier for the one who is keeping secrets. Sure there are people out their that would prefer to keep their head in the sand but the majority need and want to know. Choice can't be taken away. If someone tells their partner they need and desire to be with others and that person tells them not to mention it again. Then that's another can of worms. The partner being truthful didn't take knowledge and choice away because it would have been easier.. if their partner chooses not to know of the sexual activity, then so be it. He/She is aware of their partner's needs and desires but CHOOSES not to discuss and be aware of their lover's actions. BEING IN THE KNOW , CHOICE, RESPECT, AND CONSTANT COMMUNICATION..... you can't strong arm and bully those things away ...now, you enjoy your night.

[Vuillardgr]

Its sad how "some women" think that their words are needed on a thread like this. Only one post in the past 26 posts are actually on topic of the thread...The others are from women who feel the urgency to make some off topic statement about men or men countering them (including my posts) ........FEK :(

Of course the day wouldn't be complete without your special brand of tunnel vision and misogyny. The predictability of your way.....aww... It's right on time! LOL

See , you make comments on most if not all of my posts. You have started posts and I don't feel the need to comment on what you say all the time. You still have issues with stalking. It's sad and a bit disturbing. No one is safe from your vicious tirades. Yet, never fear... it doesn't deter me or others in the least. The way you speak to people is disgusting.

Off topic ? !! You are the master of going off topic to suit your own views. I address the issues of the post. You start attacking when the truth doesn't correlate with what you choose to believe. That isn't my problem and your aggressive tactics don't frighten me. We have been through this already.

So I'll use the word that you used to describe my thoughts but it really pertains to yours: Inconsequential

[Gearbox]

Let's just get this bullying nonsense done with now... You and a few others are the bullies on this site. Everyday, you pounce on people who don't agree with your point of view. So your distraction tactic of accusing me of something you practice without fail is insane. Telling the plain truth isn't bullying.
Look sweetheart, your trying to BS people who have a scroller bar on their screens. We can see where you came in the thread to complain to Alloiledup and then 'suggest' he keeps his opinion to himself, even though he is LIVING what the thread is about. Maybe the contentment there is too much of a good advert for 'cheating' for you? That's not Alloiledup's fault.

Now, we all have different perceptions of the truth in certain situations. And yes, it would be so much easier for us to split hairs and give half truths or none at all in order to square away our actions. Problem with that is when it comes to our partner, it is completely disrespectful to sell them short and lie about who we are and what we do. Now you can call me whatever you like, but it still doesn't erase the need for honesty and communication in relationships.
Neither of us know the details about all relationships where one decides it's better to cheat. You may say that it's NEVER better to cheat for ANYBODY. But sadly that isn't the case for all. Neither is it a mark of somebody who doesn't respect and love their partner. That's just not as easy to cut as it may seem for some.
Communication goes both ways, and as you may see by your own verssion of comunication, you try to cut out what goes against YOUR grain. So you could as yourself if it is wise for ALL to be honest with you, or tell you what you want to hear to keep you happy?

The truth will set us all free?!! Really, I wasn't aware of that fact... wait a second.. actually I AM!! That's what I've been posting all day. You are the one offering excuses as to why to keep secrets and cheat.
You actually suggested to Alloiledup NOT to be honest. Make up you mind!

What's next? Oh , sometimes its easier on the partner to not know. Who are we to assume for anyone what's best for them? Yeah its easier for the one who is keeping secrets. Sure there are people out their that would prefer to keep their head in the sand but the majority need and want to know. Choice can't be taken away. If someone tells their partner they need and desire to be with others and that person tells them not to mention it again. Then that's another can of worms. The partner being truthful didn't take knowledge and choice away because it would have been easier.. if their partner chooses not to know of the sexual activity, then so be it. He/She is aware of their partner's needs and desires but CHOOSES not to discuss and be aware of their lover's actions. BEING IN THE KNOW , CHOICE, RESPECT, AND CONSTANT COMMUNICATION..... you can't strong arm and bully those things away ...now, you enjoy your night.
I't might do you good to meet a cheater and have a COMMUNICATION with him/her. See how long that lasts for you before the Sermon on The Mount kicks in, and communication rides off into the mirky fog.:tongue:

[tenni]

Post 89
"Of course the day wouldn't be complete without your special brand of tunnel vision and misogyny."

Ah, yes I thought so. The reason that supposedly women like you and BV enter threads to cause disruption is because you believe that it is your right to do so. You show disrespect towards bisexual married men who were invited by the thread topic to state if they had a friend with benefits situation with another man.

You seem to consider it not only your right but it is misognistic for men to dare to have a thread to discuss friends with benefits without your approval and comment.

As others have stated you are not here to "learn" a damn thing. You and BV are exhibiting troll like behaviour on a bisexual website disrupting conversations about bisexuality. Whether you are misandrist or not is not that significant as much as how you both prevent open honest discourse in a bisexual web site. Well you tried to distrupt another bi male website and failed due to trying to pass yourself off as a man(posted not telling as gender) on a bisexual site restricted to bi men only. I guess that site is misogynist in your opinion even though it has a site for "bisexual women only" as well It also is owned by a woman who started the biwomen website first so that bi women would be able to discuss their issues without disruption or interference in a safe environment from hetero men who think two women together are hot. There is also a bisexual organization in Toronto that follow similar practice of bi men being able to meet on their own. Bi women being able to meet on their own. Then a joint meeting for both bi women and bi men together respecting each groups boundaries. In your mind, they are probably using tunnel vision and misogynist. This is not the 60's Vuil & BV. Catch up with the respect of boundaries and sensitivity aspect going not just one direction.

[Alloiledup]

Wow! Just signed on today again. I didn't know there were such heated discussions on this topic since I posted. Not that I owe anyone an explanation. In my case, my buddy cheated on his wife because first of all, he got practically zero sex from his wife after their 3rd child. She just completely lost interest in sex. He didn't want to cheat on her with another woman. Before their marriage when he was a teenager, he had played with other boys. It was just I guess a horny teenager kind of thing. He had so much guilt about cheating on his wife that he didn't want to see another woman. But humans in general are sexual beings. Most of us need sex physiologically and psychologically. So, given his little bit of background he had played with men before marriage and he didn't want to see another woman, he felt less of a guilt I guess trying out with men again. He ended up liking it even more than being with women. So, he became just by his sexual choices bisexual. He didn't want a divorce with his wife because he is a responsible father and the children were still young. That kinda of cheating on his wife went on for a number of years with men. He does enjoy being with men now. His children are grown up and married now too, and they often wonder why their loving father (please don't question on this one as his affairs with men have nothing to do with him being a responsible and loving father) have not yet divorced their crazy, freakishly controlling mother. But he cares so much that that family is together, his children and grandchildren that his decision is to stay married. If it sounds like I try to defend who he is, so be it. To me, he is a needle in a haystack and a wonderful man. We all have needs. He didn't want to fool around behind his wife and have an affair with another woman, he ended up playing with men, but ended up liking it. Anyway, that's his story. My point is everyone has his story behind an action. Don't judge!!! Should you believe in God, we are accountable for our actions on this earth and let him be the judge!!

[Vuillardgr]

Wow! Just signed on today again. I didn't know there were such heated discussions on this topic since I posted. Not that I owe anyone an explanation. In my case, my buddy cheated on his wife because first of all, he got practically zero sex from his wife after their 3rd child. She just completely lost interest in sex. He didn't want to cheat on her with another woman. Before their marriage when he was a teenager, he had played with other boys. It was just I guess a horny teenager kind of thing. He had so much guilt about cheating on his wife that he didn't want to see another woman. But humans in general are sexual beings. Most of us need sex physiologically and psychologically. So, given his little bit of background he had played with men before marriage and he didn't want to see another woman, he felt less of a guilt I guess trying out with men again. He ended up liking it even more than being with women. So, he became just by his sexual choices bisexual. He didn't want a divorce with his wife because he is a responsible father and the children were still young. That kinda of cheating on his wife went on for a number of years with men. He does enjoy being with men now. His children are grown up and married now too, and they often wonder why their loving father (please don't question on this one as his affairs with men have nothing to do with him being a responsible and loving father) have not yet divorced their crazy, freakishly controlling mother. But he cares so much that that family is together, his children and grandchildren that his decision is to stay married. If it sounds like I try to defend who he is, so be it. To me, he is a needle in a haystack and a wonderful man. We all have needs. He didn't want to fool around behind his wife and have an affair with another woman, he ended up playing with men, but ended up liking it. Anyway, that's his story. My point is everyone has his story behind an action. Don't judge!!! Should you believe in God, we are accountable for our actions on this earth and let him be the judge!!

You were the one who put your post up and when we do that, we invite replies. Now, I didn't say you had to explain anything. I understand he discovered he rather be with men, he claims he had a sexless marriage. I hear all that. You know what else I hear... reasons for him not to be honest with his wife about what he needed and what he was doing. He is gonna do whatever he wants to do. If he loves and respects his partner , he would have told her the truth. Judgement....no, that's just truth. You and several others can be as indignant and outraged as you like but there is no excuse for secrets and lies.

You are laying all of the issues and problems between your boyfriend and his wife squarely at her feet. But the hard truth is, it takes two to tango. Did you ever stop to think maybe she sensed something was off about their physical relationship and that caused her to take a step back? She is controlling, she is selfish, etc etc etc....yada yada. Meanwhile he is the victim who is free to lie about who he is and what he is doing. WTF?! I absolutely believe in God and since I do, I treat others as I want to be treated. And when we take vows to be truthful and respectful, we should be held to those. When does asking for mutual respect and being open equate to judgement?

So I'm judging because Im pointing out the fact that she is painted as the enemy and the cheater as the victim. BTW , Just because he is with you because you are a man doesn't mean that it isn't cheating. Gender has nothing to do with what is and isn't betrayal.

You two want to be together, more power to you ...I hope it works out in the long run, but make no mistake about it..... There is a shocking lack of respect and honesty in this scenario.

[Vuillardgr]

Post 89
"Of course the day wouldn't be complete without your special brand of tunnel vision and misogyny."

Ah, yes I thought so. The reason that supposedly women like you and BV enter threads to cause disruption is because you believe that it is your right to do so. You show disrespect towards bisexual married men who were invited by the thread topic to state if they had a friend with benefits situation with another man.

You seem to consider it not only your right but it is misognistic for men to dare to have a thread to discuss friends with benefits without your approval and comment.

As others have stated you are not here to "learn" a damn thing. You and BV are exhibiting troll like behaviour on a bisexual website disrupting conversations about bisexuality. Whether you are misandrist or not is not that significant as much as how you both prevent open honest discourse in a bisexual web site. Well you tried to distrupt another bi male website and failed due to trying to pass yourself off as a man(posted not telling as gender) on a bisexual site restricted to bi men only. I guess that site is misogynist in your opinion even though it has a site for "bisexual women only" as well It also is owned by a woman who started the biwomen website first so that bi women would be able to discuss their issues without disruption or interference in a safe environment from hetero men who think two women together are hot. There is also a bisexual organization in Toronto that follow similar practice of bi men being able to meet on their own. Bi women being able to meet on their own. Then a joint meeting for both bi women and bi men together respecting each groups boundaries. In your mind, they are probably using tunnel vision and misogynist. This is not the 60's Vuil & BV. Catch up with the respect of boundaries and sensitivity aspect going not just one direction.


There is no point trying to converse with someone who has little use for women and their feelings or opinions. You are completely transparent and heaven help any woman unfortunate enough to endure your company for any length of time. Or guy for that matter. Again since you can't deal with truth, put me on ignore . I see you still haven't done it yet. LMAO !!! I've heard about fits you pitch when you discover when other posters do it to you........ Like I said Tenni, your baseless, selfish diatribe won't deter me. I see what you are and it is weak and sad.

[Vuillardgr]

Look sweetheart, your trying to BS people who have a scroller bar on their screens. We can see where you came in the thread to complain to Alloiledup and then 'suggest' he keeps his opinion to himself, even though he is LIVING what the thread is about. Maybe the contentment there is too much of a good advert for 'cheating' for you? That's not Alloiledup's fault.

Neither of us know the details about all relationships where one decides it's better to cheat. You may say that it's NEVER better to cheat for ANYBODY. But sadly that isn't the case for all. Neither is it a mark of somebody who doesn't respect and love their partner. That's just not as easy to cut as it may seem for some.
Communication goes both ways, and as you may see by your own verssion of comunication, you try to cut out what goes against YOUR grain. So you could as yourself if it is wise for ALL to be honest with you, or tell you what you want to hear to keep you happy?

You actually suggested to Alloiledup NOT to be honest. Make up you mind!

I't might do you good to meet a cheater and have a COMMUNICATION with him/her. See how long that lasts for you before the Sermon on The Mount kicks in, and communication rides off into the mirky fog.:tongue:


LOL of course!!!!! Just read my response to Tenni, it applies to you as well. Happy attacking and twisting! :-) lol

[Gearbox]

LOL of course!!!!! Just read my response to Tenni, it applies to you as well. Happy attacking and twisting! :-) lol
Oh whatever happenned to that honest Southern girl out to help her dear old friend?:rolleyes: Save it for the tards that brought you here.;)

[tenni]

Oh whatever happened to that honest Southern girl out to help her dear old friend?:rolleyes: Save it for the tards that brought you here.;)

Yes she does post like someone who is "sent" here to disturb the site and attack bisexuals.

[darkeyes]

"There is no point trying to converse with someone who has little use for women and their feelings or opinions."

I have little use for non bisexuals regardless of their gender who come to this site under the pretense of seeking help only to turn and attack bisexuals who have an opinion that does not align with their hetero mainstream beliefs.

"You were the one who put your post up and when we do that, we invite replies."

Another example of this opinionated hetero woman attacking a bisexual man for posting his thoughts on a bisexual site under a thread specifically identified for bisexual men. We do not want your prejudiced attack opinions. He did not invite you personally to respond. The thread topic is not for visiting heterosexual opinionated women. You act so much like a troll.

" I've heard about fits you pitch when you discover when other posters do it to you."

Ah, really now. You have heard about me? Obviously, you are here to attack me. Another sign of a troll.
This is a site open to all with an interest in bisexuality..no thread is barred to any member no matter his or her gender or his or her sexuality to comment upon... if u wish to keep all your little chinwags secret because u feel unsafe, tenni, I suggest that u create a group of selected members as u are able to do on this site and vet them very carefully and keep all your little deliberations secret by keeping daft cows like me out... we do not need an invite to comment on an open thread... as members, we have a right to comment if something is said we believe needs comment upon.

[welickit]

LTR is easier for us, we share and don't cheat on each other so it is more fun with someone you both know and enjoy. It is also safer for all involved.

[Vuillardgr]

Oh whatever happenned to that honest Southern girl out to help her dear old friend?:rolleyes: Save it for the tards that brought you here.;)

Oh now you are insulting people you don't even know...actually , you do that every day here. Ever notice how you and tenni are the only ones who have a problem with what I've posted on this thread. What a coincidence right? You have no argument against truth so you go back to what you know best, insults and unfounded accusations.
Tell you what, why don't you save those little mindless gems for those nameless faceless men you suck and fuck at your local park and public bathroom gloryholes. :yikes2: You seem to be the type of individual that is more comfortable with those types of encounters. There is nothing wrong with being open and honest with one's partner. We all are duty bound to do so. Whether you agree with it or not. So if you have issues with me.... put me on ignore. I enjoy exchange of ideas, but you and a few others hate that. It's your way or no way. You attempt to throw your weight around with the ones who dare go against your self centered dogma. You insulted me and when that happens once, I over look it.... but you continue to do so...you have to ask yourself why.

Now why don't you just build your own little community of like minds and leave the rest of us that choose to consider others alone.

[Vuillardgr]

Yes she does post like someone who is "sent" here to disturb the site and attack bisexuals.

Oh you are absolutely correct... asking for honesty is a total attack on bisexuals! I am a horrible person who expects too much from people...like communication and knowing who they are. I am heinous! LMAO!! You are the attacker of bisexuals, you prove that with every single one of your posts. Again, put me on ignore ...that way, you don't have to deal with that nasty little thing called truth.

[Vuillardgr]

This is a site open to all with an interest in bisexuality..no thread is barred to any member no matter his or her gender or his or her sexuality to comment upon... if u wish to keep all your little chinwags secret because u feel unsafe, tenni, I suggest that u create a group of selected members as u are able to do on this site and vet them very carefully and keep all your little deliberations secret by keeping daft cows like me out... we do not need an invite to comment on an open thread... as members, we have a right to comment if something is said we believe needs comment upon.

AMEN!!!!!

[darkeyes]

Tell you what, why don't you save those little mindless gems for those nameless faceless men you suck and fuck at your local park and public bathroom gloryholes. :yikes2: You seem to be the type of individual that is more comfortable with those types of encounters. .
Those two sentences display an prejudice against and intolerance of homosexual and bisexual men which is I think less than appreciated on this site. They display a rather nasty streak and have just about discredited almost every other word u have written and leave a nasty taste in the mouth.. they are words of which u should be well and truly ashamed..

Still want to say Amen to my previous post?

[Vuillardgr]

So my friend and her bi husband.... As some of you may know, she is struggling with her feelings about her bi husband's relationship with his lover. Her husband has many faults , but I gotta give it to the guy.... he was honest from the beginning and before he does something, he calls her and lets her know. The main problem is he keeps changing the parameters of their agreement. For example... They agreed he would spend 3 nights a week with his boyfriend. That doesn't fill her with joy but she wants her husband to have what he needs and she is trying to make her marriage work. So, last night was the third night....he was suppose to be home tonight...but he called her from work and informed her that he just can't pull himself away from his guy and he needs another night. She hasn't seen her husband in 3 days and she was looking forward to time with him but he flips the script on her. He tells her he loves her and he hates when she cries and he doesn't want to hurt her but he loves his boyfriend just as well.

So, anyone with some objective advice out there, please share. Honestly, I think she needs to let her "sack" drop and have a candid discussion with him about holding agreements, especially when one or the other isn't ready for progression.

[Alloiledup]

So I'm judging because Im pointing out the fact that she is painted as the enemy and the cheater as the victim. BTW , Just because he is with you because you are a man doesn't mean that it isn't cheating. Gender has nothing to do with what is and isn't betrayal.

To judge without knowing all the facts is pure ignorance. Of course, I've only put a synopsis of the story else it would take days. Now again, not that I owe anyone an explanation. My buddy and his wife has seen their family doctor, and also family counsellor to no avail of the lack of interest in sex problem. They used to have amazing terrific sex when they were younger and when they were hippies in the 60's and on dope, but after the dope was gone, sexual interest lost from one partner. She had simply no libido. Men need and love sex in general I am sorry to honest with the ladies. They NEED it!!! Divorce back in the older generation was not a word that was often practised and their kids were still young, so he resorted to cheating with a caveat that he didn't want to cheat on her with another woman. Thanks for your honesty. I appreciate your honest opinion. Seriously. But don't judge, because it only reveals ignorance of all the facts.

[Vuillardgr]

Those two sentences display an prejudice against and intolerance of homosexual and bisexual men which is I think less than appreciated on this site. They display a rather nasty streak and have just about discredited almost every other word u have written and leave a nasty taste in the mouth.. they are words of which u should be well and truly ashamed..

Still want to say Amen to my previous post?

Prejudice how? From his previous posts, it rings true to what he enjoys. Not all gays or bisexuals, just him.... I would ask you to please be careful about taking statements out of context. As a minority, I am extra careful about automatically assuming someone is prejudice. I see you ignore his "tard" comment. Shouldn't you be angry that he is abusing mentally impaired people? Ashamed of what, being honest? No. I am only addressing him and no one else. Nasty streak? That's half of what I've been facing from them ...every single time I post . See this is a huge problem on this site.... you assume all gays and bisexuals engage in that particular activity, and so therefore you accuse me of being horrible. Please check yourself before you think to call someone something so heinous.

[Vuillardgr]

To judge without knowing all the facts is pure ignorance. Of course, I've only put a synopsis of the story else it would take days. Now again, not that I owe anyone an explanation. My buddy and his wife has seen their family doctor, and also family counsellor to no avail of the lack of interest in sex problem. They used to have amazing terrific sex when they were younger and when they were hippies in the 60's and on dope, but after the dope was gone, sexual interest lost from one partner. She had simply no libido. Men need and love sex in general I am sorry to honest with the ladies. They NEED it!!! Divorce back in the older generation was not a word that was often practised and their kids were still young, so he resorted to cheating with a caveat that he didn't want to cheat on her with another woman. Thanks for your honesty. I appreciate your honest opinion. Seriously. But don't judge, because it only reveals ignorance of all the facts.t h


I'm being ignorant ? I have a question for you... have you sat down and talked to your lover's wife and inquire about her side of the story instead of just going on what he told you? Usually it's just easier to go by your lovers point of view because it justifies the lying and cheating.

Please no one is arguing that men need love. Of course they do and as I stated before, I hope it works out for you both. She has no libido, she is controlling, ....maybe she is maybe she isn't.
That isn't the point. The point is she deserves to know what is going on in her husband's life...and no issues or circumstances trump that.

[Alloiledup]

One more comment. It is people who don't know all the facts and jump to judgement and conclusions that drive a partner who cannot be completely honest with their partner. In my buddy's case, to be completely honest with his wife that he had sex with men for release could be too risky knowing how his wife would jump to conclusions and decisions and judge him just like one of the members here who judged, and that could affect the lives of their children. He cared for his family so much that he would jump off the building or shoot himself before hurting his kids. Yet he had needs. Knowing how controlling his wife was and that was even observed and acknowledged by their kids themselves, he knew it wouldn't be an option to openly discuss his sexual needs with his wife. Hence he played with men, and ended up liking it too. If all partners could be completely honest with each other, it would be an ideal world, but we don't live in an ideal world. Life is full of complications that could lead us to places we had no intention to go in the beginning of our life journeys, but still somehow ended up. Don't judge else you will be judged!!!

[tenni]

This is a site open to all with an interest in bisexuality..no thread is barred to any member no matter his or her gender or his or her sexuality to comment upon... if u wish to keep all your little chinwags secret because u feel unsafe, tenni, I suggest that u create a group of selected members as u are able to do on this site and vet them very carefully and keep all your little deliberations secret by keeping daft cows like me out... we do not need an invite to comment on an open thread... as members, we have a right to comment if something is said we believe needs comment upon.

Yes, we have disagreed about this aspect of this site. Its weakness is that it is too open to bigotry towards bisexuals and in particular bisexual men. I just realized that you were the one of the first woman to post on this thread about two years ago. For some reason you think that the title of the thread is directed towards lesbians? Sometimes, luffly you can not see beyond your pretty face.

Why is this heterosexual woman so aggressive and in attack mode towards bisexual men? She seems to believe that it is her right? We bimen should live our lives as bisexuals to meet her "standards". It is simply inconsiderate and rude.

[Alloiledup]

I'm being ignorant ? I have a question for you... have you sat down and talked to your lover's wife and inquire about her side of the story instead of just going on what he told you? Usually it's just easier to go by your lovers point of view because it justifies the lying and cheating.

Please no one is arguing that men need love. Of course they do and as I stated before, I hope it works out for you both. She has no libido, she is controlling, ....maybe she is maybe she isn't.
That isn't the point. The point is she deserves to know what is going on in her husband's life...and no issues or circumstances trump that.

Let me tell you. I have been with my buddy for nearly 7 years. I met his wife. I met their children too. Their children HATE their mother! They went to see counsellors to try not to hate her. I met her in person and I observed. I concluded myself she is a control freak, just as described by her husband and their children.

[Vuillardgr]

One more comment. It is people who don't know all the facts and jump to judgement and conclusions that drive a partner who cannot be completely honest with their partner. In my buddy's case, to be completely honest with his wife that he had sex with men for release could be too risky knowing how his wife would jump to conclusions and decisions and judge him just like one of the members here who judged, and that could affect the lives of their children. He cared for his family so much that he would jump off the building or shoot himself before hurting his kids. Yet he had needs. Knowing how controlling his wife was and that was even observed and acknowledged by their kids themselves, he knew it wouldn't be an option to openly discuss his sexual needs with his wife. Hence he played with men, and ended up liking it too. If all partners could be completely honest with each other, it would be an ideal world, but we don't live in an ideal world. Life is full of complications that could lead us to places we had no intention to go in the beginning of our life journeys, but still somehow ended up. Don't judge else you will be judged!!!

What conclusions have I jumped to? I never assumed your boyfriend doesn't love his family. I am going by what you posted. You are placing all the problems on the wife..a woman you don't have a relationship with...so how do you really know her side? I'm asking you to consider that as well. Love means sharing. I hope that one day he can get to a place where he can share who he truly is with his family. Everyone involved deserves it. Why is it so wrong to expect honesty and respect from someone you are sharing a life with?! There is no justification for it. Let's just agree to disagree on the issue.

[tenni]

So my friend and her bi husband.... As some of you may know, she is struggling with her feelings about her bi husband's relationship with his lover. Her husband has many faults , but I gotta give it to the guy.... he was honest from the beginning and before he does something, he calls her and lets her know. The main problem is he keeps changing the parameters of their agreement. For example... They agreed he would spend 3 nights a week with his boyfriend. That doesn't fill her with joy but she wants her husband to have what he needs and she is trying to make her marriage work. So, last night was the third night....he was suppose to be home tonight...but he called her from work and informed her that he just can't pull himself away from his guy and he needs another night. She hasn't seen her husband in 3 days and she was looking forward to time with him but he flips the script on her. He tells her he loves her and he hates when she cries and he doesn't want to hurt her but he loves his boyfriend just as well.

So, anyone with some objective advice out there, please share. Honestly, I think she needs to let her "sack" drop and have a candid discussion with him about holding agreements, especially when one or the other isn't ready for progression.

start your own thread.

[Alloiledup]

What conclusions have I jumped to? I never assumed your boyfriend doesn't love his family. I am going by what you posted. You are placing all the problems on the wife..a woman you don't have a relationship with...so how do you really know her side? I'm asking you to consider that as well. Love means sharing. I hope that one day he can get to a place where he can share who he truly is with his family. Everyone involved deserves it. Why is it so wrong to expect honesty and respect from someone you are sharing a life with?! There is no justification for it. Let's just agree to disagree on the issue.

To be dishonest with his wife but to protect his family is a tradeoff. He elected to protect his family. It is his life choice. Who is anyone else to judge what his life choice should be? Honesty is a great trait, but protecting his family and avoiding a divorce so the family can be together is also a noble trait. You are not him in his situation to make his choices. He traded off complete honesty with his wife to protect his family. We are not to judge how he came to this decision because you are NOT in his shoes!!!

[tenni]

Those two sentences display an prejudice against and intolerance of homosexual and bisexual men which is I think less than appreciated on this site. They display a rather nasty streak and have just about discredited almost every other word u have written and leave a nasty taste in the mouth.. they are words of which u should be well and truly ashamed..

Still want to say Amen to my previous post?

Ah, words of truth my luffly. You are beginning to see this person for who they are.

[Gearbox]

Oh now you are insulting people you don't even know...actually , you do that every day here. Ever notice how you and tenni are the only ones who have a problem with what I've posted on this thread. What a coincidence right? You have no argument against truth so you go back to what you know best, insults and unfounded accusations.
Tell you what, why don't you save those little mindless gems for those nameless faceless men you suck and fuck at your local park and public bathroom gloryholes. :yikes2: You seem to be the type of individual that is more comfortable with those types of encounters. There is nothing wrong with being open and honest with one's partner. We all are duty bound to do so. Whether you agree with it or not. So if you have issues with me.... put me on ignore. I enjoy exchange of ideas, but you and a few others hate that. It's your way or no way. You attempt to throw your weight around with the ones who dare go against your self centered dogma. You insulted me and when that happens once, I over look it.... but you continue to do so...you have to ask yourself why.

Now why don't you just build your own little community of like minds and leave the rest of us that choose to consider others alone.
I've never sucked or fucked a bloke in a park, toilet or gloryhole. But you think I'm 'That Type', and you claim not to be prejudice. Bullshit!
You couldn't get away with this crap on the other site you tried to troll. Your 'honest Southern woman with principles and morals' etc was a MAN there, I hear.:rolleyes:
ONLY NOW you decide to make a thread to aid your 'friends problem'.8 mths? Bet she's excited now!lol

Get some help for yourself please! Leave the thinking to a qualified therapist who'll prescribe the correct kind of 'medicine' for you, and everything will be ok again.;)

[darkeyes]

I've never sucked or fucked a bloke in a park, toilet or gloryhole. But you think I'm 'That Type', and you claim not to be prejudice. Bullshit!
You couldn't get away with this crap on the other site you tried to troll. Your 'honest Southern woman with principles and morals' etc was a MAN there, I hear.:rolleyes:
ONLY NOW you decide to make a thread to aid your 'friends problem'.8 mths? Bet she's excited now!lol

Get some help for yourself please! Leave the thinking to a qualified therapist who'll prescribe the correct kind of 'medicine' for you, and everything will be ok again.;)
Have never sucked a guy in a glory hole.. but have in a loo.. me own or at parties mostly. Public 1 too tho... in a pub ... wos well pickled.. young and daft and horny.. an that was and more in some ver sleezy places.. a few times in a loo with girls too in clubs an' parties...and in next cubicle was sometimes 2 girls doin same thing.. hotter an hornier;)...and even horror of horror in loo with me own partner....an' like the kirk doorway at Aviemore... that was a girl an the minister was less than pleased..and had word in me dad's ear'ole... graveyards 1ce or twice.. both genders.. such sacrilege...gonna burn in hell for that sure enuff... have done it in parks tho Gear.. Holyrood park 2 name but 1.. a Royal Park 2.. and moren 1ce...both genders an all... and recently an' all up Arthur's Seat... tsk Kate.. I just can't resist ya at times... full view of the palace an all.. is ok.. Queen wasn't in residence.. no doubt she and Phil did same when young but at least they had all that luffly land all 2 themselves and the peasants wud b told 2 stay indoors and draw the curtains... and God knows wot Wills and Kate get up 2 up at Balmoral wen they have walkies...quite salubrious sex in a Royal park tho... is that sleezy or posh?

Some peeps just don't have fun..am not lil old lady yet.. don't do it here there and everywer like 1ce not so long ago... not in front of the children, Gear..that kind of changes ur perceptions:bigrin:...but hope old and walking bout wiv me zimmer I don't turn out 2 be a frosty faced, iron knickered old frump who has forgotten the fun and life she had when young, horny and daft objecting to the young havin' gud time and enjoying life just cos I'm too fuckin old and bitter 2 b able 2 do it ne more mesel...... get a grip, Vuill girl.. life 2 short.. God I don't haff miss the thrill of unbridled tartery..:(

[The Bisexual Virgin]

To be dishonest with his wife but to protect his family is a tradeoff. He elected to protect his family. It is his life choice. Who is anyone else to judge what his life choice should be? Honesty is a great trait, but protecting his family and avoiding a divorce so the family can be together is also a noble trait. You are not him in his situation to make his choices. He traded off complete honesty with his wife to protect his family. We are not to judge how he came to this decision because you are NOT in his shoes!!!

Sweetheart your fuck buddy sounds GAY, as hell to me, and he could have always been gay. And he is extremely selfish for cheating on his wife with men no less, and not admit to cheating.I will admit I have a serious issue with bisexual men.They do fucked up shit, and will no own up to it, and they are completely ass backwards. And I also believe you should have at least have the common decency to tell your friends wife. Although you might think she is a terrible person she does not need to be made a fool of,because that's what her GAY husband is doing, making a complete fool out of her.

[DuckiesDarling]

Sweetheart your fuck buddy sounds GAY, as hell to me, and he could have always been gay. And he is extremely selfish for cheating on his wife with men no less, and not admit to cheating.I will admit I have a serious issue with bisexual men.They do fucked up shit, and will no own up to it, and they are completely ass backwards. And I also believe you should have at least have the common decency to tell your friends wife. Although you might think she is a terrible person she does not need to be made a fool of,because that's what her GAY husband is doing, making a complete fool out of her.

I honestly cannot wait until you are banned and posts like the above are removed from this site. Completely and totally uncalled for and once again you prove youself to be totally clueless and less than tactful.

[csrakate]

I will admit I have a serious issue with bisexual men.

NO SHIT!!!!!! I have to wonder....do you feel the same way about bisexual women? Seems odd to me that you can't have a modicum of empathy towards bisexual men and yet you call yourself bisexual.

[The Bisexual Virgin]

I honestly cannot wait until you are banned and posts like the above are removed from this site. Completely and totally uncalled for and once again you prove youself to be totally clueless and less than tactful.

Clueless? No. Less than tactful? Maybe.:rolleyes:

[DuckiesDarling]

ROFLMAO Voted off the Island... I love you, Drew :D

[Alloiledup]

Sweetheart your fuck buddy sounds GAY, as hell to me, and he could have always been gay. And he is extremely selfish for cheating on his wife with men no less, and not admit to cheating.I will admit I have a serious issue with bisexual men.They do fucked up shit, and will no own up to it, and they are completely ass backwards. And I also believe you should have at least have the common decency to tell your friends wife. Although you might think she is a terrible person she does not need to be made a fool of,because that's what her GAY husband is doing, making a complete fool out of her.

Without facts, your view is only an opinion. My buddy is not gay. If we walk on the street and he saw a beautiful woman, he would still comment that he wanted to fuck her. Gays don't do that when they see a beautiful woman on the street and would say they want to fuck her. It's that simple. He never denies nor have I said also that he is not cheating, but I said on the forum here his struggles and his journey how he was with his wife in a monogamous relationship and ended up being with me in a man to man relationship. I never denied he was cheating, but all I said is he is not the kind of villian as you might think he is. He got no sex at home. Men want sex. When men get married, is it strictly for love and not for a fuck? I think women are being naive if they think like that. Yes, love is part of it. But lust, sex are also part of it. You don't fuck your best friend, you fuck your wife. He needed a fuck, he wasn't getting it at home. He tried not to hurt his young families so he cheated and he tried it out on men. When a man gets married, it's 1+1 = 2. In his case, with 3 young kids, it became 1+1 = 5. The dynamics have changed. The formula has changed. He knew he could not be completely honest with his wife because she was a control freak and as I said, even his grown up kids now think why their dad has to put up with all her bullshits now. With 1+1 no longer equals 2 but 5, there was a lot more to think about. We all have needs and sexual needs is one of them. So he cheated because he knew his wife wouldn't be able to handle it and the family would break up. He made life choice out of a now a complex situation. No longer 1+1=2 when he also needed to consider his needs and his family and what he didn't get from home i.e. sex. Yes he was cheating, but he never has been such a villian as one might think. We all have stories to how we become what we are today. It's never just so black and white.

[i_shoot_blanks]

Getting back to the original question of this thread, I'm married, bi and I wish I had a regular friend with benefits.

[a2smith09]

Yes let's get back on topic. I too am married. I've got two regular friends with benefits. One is my original friend with benefits. We've been sharing benefits since we were 14. I've also got another regular too.

[gen11]

Glad to know I'm not alone. Of course Chicagom is intensely condescending of closet married bis, so we must all be "wrong" . . . his wisdom towering like it does . . . .

[DuckiesDarling]

Glad to know I'm not alone. Of course Chicagom is intensely condescending of closet married bis, so we must all be "wrong" . . . his wisdom towering like it does . . . .

Umm.. not seeing a single comment in this thread by Chicagom, let alone any comments to support that statement, Gen11.....

[gen11]

Maybe I posted it on the wrong thread. I was mucking around in two. Check the Lincoln/Obama update. Meantime, you cited personal experience as verification of an opinion you offered. I claim the same -- only scratching a gnat-bite.

[**Peg**]

. . . his wisdom towering like it does . . . .

yup... his wisdom towers over you... wise enough and classy enough to hold his mud ...

sarcasm: the refuge of the intellectually castrated (and a few heavy drinkers I know)

[JP1986UM]

UMMMMMM Tenni re-read what you just wrote.Some of these men have fwb, on the side without their wives knowing,so therefore some of thse guys are having with another man.And believe me I am no troll. And, yes I have a distrust of men, and especially bi men,shouldn't every self-respecting woman feel the the same?
I know she's not here anymore thankfully, but lemme respond to this all the same.

I finally found a wonderful male partner. Been with him for 6 months. Wife knows. She encourages it. Why? Because it helps me be me and "I am a better husband" (her words) now that I have a male lover as well as a marriage to her. Her trust of me INCREASED because she knew I would be responsible, not less so. Every self-respecting woman who has a bisexual husband shouldn't distrust their husband, they should work with them and work toward self fulfillment. Just as she's done with my BF and I.

She has indicated she'd like to join us at some point, but that's likely not going to happen because he and I are in the midwest and she and the kids are in Florida. (Long story), plus I am leaving here at the end of Sept to rejoin the family as my work here will be done. They are my priority. It sucks for my bi sex life, BUT it is what it is. So I'll enjoy what I can while I can. My wife is fine with it. I hope secretly she reaches out and finds her inner bisexual woman. She has fantasies and dreams about it so I know she is bisexual, but the fear of going that extra step makes her tentative. It truly is a wonderful thing.

[biairborne]

i have two regular guys here in savannah that i play with and its some of the best sex, ive been with one for over a year now

[ErosUrge]

well, after having read ALL of the posts here, where does one start?...I agree with much here and disagree with some. I also saw how things went rampant when certain points were made and all went in different directions until some calmness was restored.

I can only respond to this with my own experiences and hope to shed some light on this topic but of course, only from my experiences.

There was a time when I was married some years ago and thought that I would never venture beyond the marriage to indulge in my hunger for male sex ever again. As time moved forward and some months into the relationship, I found my appetites returning. Eventually I ventured out and indulged. When it first happened and after the first encounter, I felt the most intense guilt because I knew that I had betrayed a trust made to a woman that believed I was her one and only; sexually and otherwise. I told myself that would be the one and only encounter but as time moved on again, it happened again and again and again. In my case, there was not the issue of my wife lacking in anything sexually and I enjoyed it immensely with her as well. I never told her but lived in constant guilt. What can happen when one lives in secret and hides is that a self loathing can develop and did with me. Though she never knew, (but perhaps sensed it) my guilt caused other issues.

There is so much to tell...the truth is that the marriage suffered because of the secrecy and deceit. Of course we parted ways and divorced based on the fact that I was absent to her needs on a personal level...I had become distant. The sex between us probably suffered because of all of this...when we parted, it was the darkest and most emotionally painful moment of my life. This was mainly due to the fact that we had a child between us who was not yet 2 years old. I hated myself in that time. And I realized that something had to change in myself if I was ever going to be with anyone again and mostly if I was ever going to be at peace with myself.

So I started the work to delve into myself deeper than I ever had before; real soul searching. I went into therapy for it as I was determined once and for all to not ever let this happen again. At first it was the struggle with denying that I was bi and that somehow I was going to 'overcome' being bi...but I learned to turn around and face me and see myself for who I was. This took another 9 full years of working towards finding out who I was/am. The process was gradual steps and when I reached a plateau of understanding, I realized that I loved and adored women; sexually, emotionally, etc and that I simply had an appetite sexually for men and nothing else and that the time to quit hating myself for it had arrived. I

nterestingly, my closest male friends, I was/am never sexual with and those I am sexual with, our common interest is sex only. We don't go out or hang out, it's sex. We have some conversations but nothing in depth like my close male friends. When I saw this, I finally embraced it and accepted it. Since that time, I make it very clear to any woman that I have had interest in that I'm bi. This has proven difficult and one of the two women parted with me after a year of trying to accept it but never could. But she thanked me for being honest with her from the start. The other one didn't ever protest, but for other reasons we went our separate ways...I eventually would like to connect with a woman that would understand and accept this about me realizing that I would always love her and that my indulgence with men is purely sexual.

I do know of men who have friends with benefits and their wives/girlfriends/partners/ are fully aware. Their relationships are stable as that understanding is between them. But I must say that not everyone has this choice. I'm not condoning that men be dishonest but everyone has their reasons and everyone has an opinion about those reasons. Ultimately it is their burden to carry if they choose to hide and be secretive. But I feel it very wrong to condemn them in such a manner as has been the case with many posts here. I have no desire to condemn AllOiledUp and his friend; they will work through whatever it is they have to and the wife too...the dynamics in that whole situation are in the hands of those involved whatever the outcome. There's all kinds of perspectives in that situation for those involved and those outside looking in have their reason for making comments about it...and sometimes the truth is the best medicine and sometimes there are those who can't handle it. And perhaps the children do loathe their mother...I don't know. Maybe the children should know about their father; again, I don't know. My child has known I am bi for the last 6 years as she is now a young woman and completely accepts me. But maybe this man's children would not; what then?

Though this topic was obviously intended for males to respond to it, I feel nothing on this site is exclusive to any one gender. We're here hopefully to try and understand one another regardless of gender. Surely, there are some areas that women will understand concerning women better and the same is true with males understanding males. But the beauty of it would be to have us all try to understand together. Isn't that the dance of the sexes? Besides, there's a bit of each gender in all of us like it or not.

Concerning attacks and judgements, I have used this line from a verse in the bible so often and it is one that is so familiar to anyone who has had a Christian upbringing..."whoever is without sin, cast the first stone"... No, I am not some bible thumping scholar or pretend to be and don't live a so called Christian life either. We can qualify the nature of such 'sin' to fit into what we think or believe, but it's all the same...

We all have viewpoints....please, let's be more civil with one another...I come to this website for inspiration and community. Challenges are good, but insults should be left outside this domain. I must admit that I have wanted to start threads here but have been reluctant because I've been worried about the attacks that might happen; especially on one topic. Perhaps one day I'll introduce it.

[Binproud]

People that have someone are lucky. Living in a small rural small town makes it tough. I'm looking, and looking..........................

[ohbimale]

After a few years of a dry spell I once again have a friend with benefits. I lucked out and met him. I enjoy our occassional get togethers, 2 to 6 times a month. I have a man who enjoys receiving oral as much as I enjoy giving it. I love it.

[pittsfieldm]

im 40 now but before about 3 years ago, i would do it random guys. I told my wife about my attraction to men and we both have a friend we met off a online site. He is bi and we meet with him all the time. it usually goes, he will stay one night with my wife and the next night with me. Then we will meet up and all three of us will have sex. When he comes over, its up to him who he wants to have sex with.

[luvtocum]

I have had this regular Bi couple i been messing with for a while now. When we are not ganging up on his wife, him and i share some quality time naked. I have no problem sucking his cum down my throat. Its a real turnon sucking his 9 in cock.

[TouchHere]

Many interesting points being made here. Having been honest about my sexual preferences since the beginning of my marriage, the "cheating" aspect doesn't enter the conversation. My connections with both males and females have been with people well-known to me so, in general, much safer emotionally and STD-wise. My male bi-pal of the last 8 years has been fun for both me and my wife. Even when she's "not in the mood", she likes watching us (which often changes her mood). She knows I'm much more romantically drawn to females and more friends with males - so my male friend wasn't as challenging to her as the female FWB. Since we've moved recently, I do miss my bi-guy and hope to meet someone to fill that role. I know it will take time and patience. Luckily, my sex life with my wife is good so, unlike many males, I'm not desperate for sex in general. I am very wary of NSA hook-ups in the MSM world as the prevalence of disease is high. Another married man who is honest with his wife, willing to get tested, and has some similar interests (hike, bike, strum some guitar for example) would be wonderful.

[TouchHere]

I have had this regular Bi couple i been messing with for a while now. When we are not ganging up on his wife, him and i share some quality time naked. I have no problem sucking his cum down my throat. Its a real turnon sucking his 9 in cock.

Good for you!! I'd love to play with a couple.

[gen11]

Much prefer a single fwb. Had one for about a year; we've drifted apart; I'm looking for another, "getting a little" from time to time during the search.

[dick_pumper]

Well this is the main reason I joined up with this site. I am in Michigan and looking for a partner to share the male side of my sexuality. So far I have met a few people, but haven't met up in the real world. I would love to find that one guy that we can get together and play on a regular basis. So anybody in Michigan under 50?

[Hank63]

I used to have a "Regular Friend with benefits" when I live in PA. But Since I relocated back home to South Georgia 7 years ago things have been hit and miss at best. That is one of the reasons I joined up for this site the other is To share my thoughts and experiences with like minded people. Here in the bible belt everyone is very closed minded about any orientation except for straight.

[funin951]

friends with benefits never last.. the sad thing is when there is a real connection then over time emotions become involved.. and the very thing you wish for, an uncomplicated relationship, becomes complicated. As some one said hurt feeling all around after that. Just enjoy the short time you are with them..

[cbj4162]

Looking!!!

[bikurinpa]

I am in Central Pa, and this area is area here is very extremely hard for someone my age, (late 40's) I used to have a older friend with benefits and worked out very nicely for several yrs till they moved away, and can not find another one. Not any good chatrooms anymore that I know of, maybe someone out there knows of some who can let me know of, but most m2m sites are loaded with game players and guys who are just totally "out" and the ones who are at least 1/2 way decent will not even respond back, and few sites around like this one for bi married, there is absolutely no members on this site within 75 miles of me!

[seeknay]

I would love to have a regular "friends with benefits". Someone similar to me, married.

[sterculius]

Hi everyone, I'm just asking this question to see if bi attached / married guys prefer to have a long-term 1-on-1 with another guy, or if they like to just meet up randomly.

Myself, I have a "special friend", another married guy that I meet up with regularly. It has been about 3 years now. It's been very hot and erotic. Also, there's the knowledge that because it's just the 2 of us, there's less potential for risks.

Any thoughts?

I'm strictly a cocksucker and I too have a friend, married as I am, to whom I give blowjobs on an irregular basis. Occasionally, he'll bring a friend with him when we meet and I'll blow him also. Once, he brought two of his friends for me to suck off.

[texguy3640]

A regular bi married guy is the best and very hard to find but I keep looking.

[bi4asplay]

Hi everyone, I'm just asking this question to see if bi attached / married guys prefer to have a long-term 1-on-1 with another guy, or if they like to just meet up randomly.

Myself, I have a "special friend", another married guy that I meet up with regularly. It has been about 3 years now. It's been very hot and erotic. Also, there's the knowledge that because it's just the 2 of us, there's less potential for risks.

Any thoughts?


I would truly love to find a BI friend to play with long term. Safty is the first reason. Comfort is a very large reason for it. It would be nice to have a buddy where we were comfortably enough with one another thaqt from time to time one or the other would just say come here let me suck your cock and maybe play later. I would have to be totally comfortable to do that.

Yes I want a LTR with a play buddy!!!

[charles-smythe]

Hi everyone, I'm just asking this question to see if bi attached / married guys prefer to have a long-term 1-on-1 with another guy, or if they like to just meet up randomly.

Myself, I have a "special friend", another married guy that I meet up with regularly. It has been about 3 years now. It's been very hot and erotic. Also, there's the knowledge that because it's just the 2 of us, there's less potential for risks.

Any thoughts? …no but one of my old ‘friend with benefits’…a feeder…is looking for a cocksucker on a regular basis in the dallas area if anyone is intersted…

[Boats]

I had one for many years, but a little over 2 years ago he died of a heart attack. I haven't had to good of luck finding a replacement. But I'm not giving up hope.
boats

[monaohio]

I do not wish I did have a man friend near me so I can suck and he do me like a woman

[sweecocksucker69]

I had a long time male lover that lasted for 30+ years until died, I was married (and still am, to my knowledge she never let knew). I miss our weekly afternoon affairs. It's hard but I'm still looking for someone I can meet and we can start an affair.

[cuttin2dachase]

I am emotionally geared only toward women when it comes to love and relationships. I'm twice married and divorced/separated and have been in several other love relationships of over a year with women. I am capable of forming and feeling a male bond with some men I meet, but I've never developed feelings of love for men nor do I have any desire to be in a mm relationship beyond a FWB sort of arrangement. Paradoxically, I do enjoy flirting, romance and intimacy with men (ie. kissing/making out, calling a male lover 'baby' etc.). When I am with a man and we're being very intimate and sexual, I get feelings that I get when I make love with a woman, but I've never felt true emotions with men. Consequentially, the great majority of men I've been with were one-time hookups. Usually either he, I or both of us had no desire to meet again although we both enjoyed the sex very much. From time to time, there were men with whom I just clicked and they had a mutual desire to meet again as did I. When we did arrange to meet again, I felt the same nervous, but pleasant anticipation as if I were dating a woman I'd had sex with previously. My cock even got hard thinking about having sex with him again. There have been less than 10 men I met multiple times and only 2 or 3 of the one-timers I hoped to meet again but who didn't want to meet me.

I had one married boyfriend several years ago whom I met 6 or 7 times over the space of a year. It was like we both flipped a switch and became passionate lovers when I greeted him naked at my door and then we both flipped the switch off when we parted. Both of us selectively met other men too. Neither of us wanted to be exclusive with each other. In fact it made for some very hot pillow talk when we'd tell each other about our sexual experiences with other men as we were playing with each other. I felt a closeness with him I'd never felt before with a man, but it was nothing resembling love.

I've met 6 guys since I moved here last June. I currently see just one guy semi-regularly, but it's a one-way thing. He's married and only wants to edge me for an hour or so before sucking me to completion. He quickly leaves after I've fed him. I'm cool with it, but want more. After all, I crave sensual play and sucking cock too LOL. My ideal situation would be to have 2 maybe 3 other FWBs who enjoy the same things as my former bf and I enjoyed. The feelings of closeness and the anticipation of repeating them over and over with a boyfriend/lover is what I'd like to experience with other men on a semi-regular basis.

[Fzmr9t]

Met a guy about 2 weeks ago on the net and we met for lunch and had a beer (well he had a beer) and just chatted. We met at his place 2 days later and really hit it off. He said that he hadn't kissed another guy before, but took to it like a duck to water we kissed, caressed and sucked each other for a bit, then went to his bed and sucked each other to completion (69). It was awesome. Met again 2-3 days later for a quickie "nooner" and although it was over soon, we apparently both enjoyed it because we are going to try to meet again next week
the schedules are difficult 'cuz he lives out of town and just comes in for 3-4days to work, and well, we're both married so we have to be discreet about our meetings
i am looking forward to our next encounter though. Been watching gay porn, and am really horned up!

[Tungtwat]

I met a co worker one night when shopping We went and had a couple of beers. We started talking about sexual things we had done and ended up taking our cock out he felt mine first the I stroked his I still done no why but i leaned over and took his cock in my mouth then started sucking it. He held my head down till I felt it throb an spit his cum in mouth. I didn't stop I just sucked and swallowed till he was finishe He said he really like me sucking his cock and I could do it when ever I wanted if he was free We tried to get together often I even manage to suck his cock at work a few times. He later introduced me to another Guy that worked in the office . He was single at the time , I could call and go to his home to suck his cock at night.

[grxclaus]

No, but I wished I did.

[nycleisure]

While I haven't had much bi experience in my life, finding an interesting guy who I could connect with would be my goal. I've a few close male friends, but none of whom would I consider to also have a sensual relationship with. Having a FEB who I could spend time with both in and out of each other's pants would be ideal.

[Sigstache]

No but I've been looking for one. Its a difficult thing to find.

[Coast bi racer]

I too have been looking for one. I thought I had found a guy but he was more then two hours away and our schedule was very conflicting. His wife and mine were supportive and we met once or twice, the first time I sucked him. Then about 3 months of trying to meet again we finally got a chance and we actually fucked. After we fucked we went and got some food and he told me his wife and him were splitting up and that he wanted to explore more of his gay side. He also said that his wife wanted to split up due to her desiring other men. I told him the reason I liked our arrangement was because he was married and I liked the lower risk of catching a std. After we talked he asked if I wanted to meet again and I sadly called it off. I just didn't like knowing that he was going to be sleeping around with a bunch of other guys that might have who knows what then have the possibility of giving it to me and in turn me giving it to my wife. Plus he wasn't one for the safest of practices. So the search continues. Wish one of you guys lived closer! Ive been craving cock like crazy.

[Coast bi racer]

No but I've been looking for one. Its a difficult thing to find.

Sent you a message.

[ml830]

I am not sure what relationhip I would want. LTR would be more stable, but I could only consider this if my wife accepted my position.

[The Galion]

If my wife accepted me< LTR with a nice friend I have. Doing it anyway. He wants what he wants, I get I what I want. It's good! Mmmmm. Not often enough tho. I need cock.

[pole_smoker]

If my wife accepted me< LTR with a nice friend I have. Doing it anyway. He wants what he wants, I get I what I want. It's good! Mmmmm. Not often enough tho. I need cock.

Lol that's nor a LTR or actual relationship, he is nothing but a fuck buddy who you are cheating on your wife who you supposedly love and care for. Just be a man for once and get a divorce.

[charles-smythe]

Hi everyone, I'm just asking this question to see if bi attached / married guys prefer to have a long-term 1-on-1 with another guy, or if they like to just meet up randomly.

Myself, I have a "special friend", another married guy that I meet up with regularly. It has been about 3 years now. It's been very hot and erotic. Also, there's the knowledge that because it's just the 2 of us, there's less potential for risks.

Any thoughts? …I use to live alone so was almost always available…for a couple of years I was the FWB of 8 or 10 married guys…my mouth was only a phone call away…I sucked on short notice…

[BiMarriedGuy816]

I am not very experienced yet but I would prefer a fwb situation. Which is what I am desperately seeking.

[cuttin2dachase]

There is no shortage of bi men out there who'd very much love to have a regular or semi regular FWB (or several of them) for hot, fun no strings mm sex. They are everywhere on Craigslist and the other major mm hookup sites. Peruse any of those sites, read the profiles/ads and you'll quickly notice that the great majority of those men are married men. You'll also notice that almost no matter where you live, there are plenty such men nearby. They don't hide the fact that they are down low and looking to step out on their wives to get the mm sex they crave or any sex they can find. Many are getting little or no sex at all at home. They will take the risk to meet other men rather than be forced to have boring sex or no sex at all at home. Why not seek other women? Because (A) they want cocks and or blowjobs and both are readily and easily found in men...and... (B) mistresses can be high maintenance and often bring drama. They tend to look primarily for other married men because as a general rule married men practice safer mm sex so that there is less risk of taking home an STD souvenir of their manfun to their wives. I have met hardly any married men who felt guilt or shame at having sex with me. Almost all of them say they don't feel like they are cheating when they have sex with other men, but they would consider it cheating and feel guilty having sex with other women.

Why are so many bi married men frustrated that they can meet dozens of other eager and willing bi married men online, but still not arrange to meet up in real time with a FWB for regular mm sex when there are so many of them nearby? The primary obstacle is that married men can't generally host at their homes. If they can, it is at best very seldom that they get such an opportunity. Many won't even host when their families are out off town for fear of nosy or gossipy neighbors catching on. For a FWB hookup, 2 things are needed...motive (aka mood) and opportunity (a place and a time to play and proximity to each other). No problem with the motive part. Most married bi men are horny for other men most of the time or they wouldn't be spending so much time online searching. The devil in the details is that one partner has to have or know of a safe & private place to play. Also both men must be able to get away from home or work (usually on short notice) and not have to travel too far to meet at their designated rendezvous place at the same time. Where there's a will there's a way. Bi married men need to work together, be patient and ready to take advantage of any opportunity that arises in order to be regular FWBs. Often a calculated risk must be taken by one or both but it is almost always worth that risk. Staying in touch and being able to discreetly contact each other is a must. Establishing a short term and a long term plan to meet can't hurt either ! I can only host occasionally, and I have plans in place with several men I've met and several that I'd love to meet so that I can take advantage of my opportunity when I have the house to myself ;)

[pole_smoker]

There is no shortage of bi men out there who'd very much love to have a regular or semi regular FWB (or several of them) for hot, fun no strings mm sex. They are everywhere on Craigslist and the other major mm hookup sites. Peruse any of those sites, read the profiles/ads and you'll quickly notice that the great majority of those men are married men. You'll also notice that almost no matter where you live, there are plenty such men nearby. They don't hide the fact that they are down low and looking to step out on their wives to get the mm sex they crave or any sex they can find. Many are getting little or no sex at all at home. They will take the risk to meet other men rather than be forced to have boring sex or no sex at all at home. Why not seek other women? Because (A) they want cocks and or blowjobs and both are readily and easily found in men...and... (B) mistresses can be high maintenance and often bring drama. They tend to look primarily for other married men because as a general rule married men practice safer mm sex so that there is less risk of taking home an STD souvenir of their manfun to their wives. I have met hardly any married men who felt guilt or shame at having sex with me. Almost all of them say they don't feel like they are cheating when they have sex with other men, but they would consider it cheating and feel guilty having sex with other women.

Why are so many bi married men frustrated that they can meet dozens of other eager and willing bi married men online, but still not arrange to meet up in real time with a FWB for regular mm sex when there are so many of them nearby? The primary obstacle is that married men can't generally host at their homes. If they can, it is at best very seldom that they get such an opportunity. Many won't even host when their families are out off town for fear of nosy or gossipy neighbors catching on. For a FWB hookup, 2 things are needed...motive (aka mood) and opportunity (a place and a time to play and proximity to each other). No problem with the motive part. Most married bi men are horny for other men most of the time or they wouldn't be spending so much time online searching. The devil in the details is that one partner has to have or know of a safe & private place to play. Also both men must be able to get away from home or work (usually on short notice) and not have to travel too far to meet at their designated rendezvous place at the same time. Where there's a will there's a way. Bi married men need to work together, be patient and ready to take advantage of any opportunity that arises in order to be regular FWBs. Often a calculated risk must be taken by one or both but it is almost always worth that risk. Staying in touch and being able to discreetly contact each other is a must. Establishing a short term and a long term plan to meet can't hurt either ! I can only host occasionally, and I have plans in place with several men I've met and several that I'd love to meet so that I can take advantage of my opportunity when I have the house to myself ;)
If they're married and their wife or husband doesn't know they're having sex with other people regardless of if it's with a man then it's cheating.

Not all bisexual men are into cheating on their female or even male partner/spouse. A lot of times if a man is married to a woman and cheats on her with men he's gay and not bisexual.

[donttellnehismy]

LTR all the way. I'm not a one night stand kimd of guy. In fact over the weekend I reconnected with an old "friend".

[Java555]

I have one buddy i see maybe once a month. Wish it was more often but will take what i have. I enjoy the sex and so does he.

[centillini]

Did have but she moved, looking for another special person

[charles-smythe]

There is no shortage of bi men out there who'd very much love to have a regular or semi regular FWB (or several of them) for hot, fun no strings mm sex. They are everywhere on Craigslist and the other major mm hookup sites. Peruse any of those sites, read the profiles/ads and you'll quickly notice that the great majority of those men are married men. You'll also notice that almost no matter where you live, there are plenty such men nearby. They don't hide the fact that they are down low and looking to step out on their wives to get the mm sex they crave or any sex they can find. Many are getting little or no sex at all at home. They will take the risk to meet other men rather than be forced to have boring sex or no sex at all at home. Why not seek other women? Because (A) they want cocks and or blowjobs and both are readily and easily found in men...and... (B) mistresses can be high maintenance and often bring drama. They tend to look primarily for other married men because as a general rule married men practice safer mm sex so that there is less risk of taking home an STD souvenir of their manfun to their wives. I have met hardly any married men who felt guilt or shame at having sex with me. Almost all of them say they don't feel like they are cheating when they have sex with other men, but they would consider it cheating and feel guilty having sex with other women.

Why are so many bi married men frustrated that they can meet dozens of other eager and willing bi married men online, but still not arrange to meet up in real time with a FWB for regular mm sex when there are so many of them nearby? The primary obstacle is that married men can't generally host at their homes. If they can, it is at best very seldom that they get such an opportunity. Many won't even host when their families are out off town for fear of nosy or gossipy neighbors catching on. For a FWB hookup, 2 things are needed...motive (aka mood) and opportunity (a place and a time to play and proximity to each other). No problem with the motive part. Most married bi men are horny for other men most of the time or they wouldn't be spending so much time online searching. The devil in the details is that one partner has to have or know of a safe & private place to play. Also both men must be able to get away from home or work (usually on short notice) and not have to travel too far to meet at their designated rendezvous place at the same time. Where there's a will there's a way. Bi married men need to work together, be patient and ready to take advantage of any opportunity that arises in order to be regular FWBs. Often a calculated risk must be taken by one or both but it is almost always worth that risk. Staying in touch and being able to discreetly contact each other is a must. Establishing a short term and a long term plan to meet can't hurt either ! I can only host occasionally, and I have plans in place with several men I've met and several that I'd love to meet so that I can take advantage of my opportunity when I have the house to myself ;) …this goes along with what I said about living alone so having a safe place for us to get together…there was a time when I wasn’t working so had all the time in the world to be on the net looking for dick…there was almost a year & a half when I averaged 2 dicks a day…the majority married…because I was available 24/7 there were days I blew a guy on his way to work…another at lunch…another late afternoon…& another on his way home from work…..& then another in the evening…the thing that slowed me down was the price of gass…most of my visitors lived in other parts of the metro-plex…far enough away that they wouldn’t be seen by anyone they knew…….when gas went up they were no longer able to conceal theextra miles driven to their wives…

[Visexual]

I got lucky, (pun intended), and found a true friend almost two years ago. We live very close, our wives know we're friends and we even do things as two couples at times so it's not an ordeal to see each other.

We enjoy each other's company whether just socially or sexually.

[donttellnehismy]

I had an old friend I used to PLAY with when I was younger come back into my life. We rekindled the old flame over the wrekend.

[charles-smythe]

I had an old friend I used to PLAY with when I was younger come back into my life. We rekindled the old flame over the wrekend.
…sounds like an interesting story…tell us about it…don’t skip the details…

[donttellnehismy]

Well it started when we were well I'll just say young because I know drew frowns on posts like that. We found a copy of Penthouse in my parents bathroom which had a girl girl and a guy girl pictorial. We just started imitating everything we saw. Then we broke up became on and off friends. This last week we found each other on Facebook and met up. Over the weekend we started talking about old times and one thing led to another. If you want more details you can inbox or yahoo me.

UOTE=charles-smythe;288194] …sounds like an interesting story…tell us about it…don’t skip the details…
[/QUOTE]

[charles-smythe]

http://imagehost.thasnasty.com/?di=PG48

[Oztrich]

Yes! I saw one guy for five years. It only ended when he moved a long way away. His wife knew about it, mine did not, though my wife knows I am bisexual. It was really hard to keep the secret, but it was worth it. Being exclusive is always better, safer, and a lot more comfortable. I met a guy recently, and it looks like it could go the same way. His wife knows he is bi, but does not know he wants to act on it. I will be seeing him in about an hour and am about bursting with anticipation. A good FWB is worth a lot! The guy I saw before, and his wife, were very open. She was bi as well, and I think that helped.

[MD2980]

I would love to have a FWB (male that is). I hope that if I find the right man, the logistical details would fall into place. Meeting that persons seems to be the challenge for me.

[sterculius]

My first FWB was my best friend Larry. What started out as jerk off sessions morphed into mutual masturbation and inevitably, the exchanging of blowjobs. It became immediately apparent that although I delighted in sucking his cock, he was less than enthusiastic about returning the favor. We eventually arrived at the mutually agreeable understanding that he would permit me to continue sucking his cock if I would agree to allow him to savagely fuck my throat. This happy compromise set the pattern that has followed me all my life. I would alternate between brief but intense episodes of virtually non stop oral servitude and degradation followed by extended periods of strictly heterosexual relationships. You could call me a serial cocksucker. Although I'm presently married to the woman I love and consider my best friend and life partner, I also meet on an irregular basis with my latest FWB, another married man like myself, to suck his cock and also occasionally suck the cocks of a few of his friends too. Friends with friends with benefits! Or, friends with benefits with friends?

[snakey123]

I have a FWB, saw him yesterday, all we have ever done is blow each other, after years of knowing each other this is what we have become comfortable with, there's no wanting to kiss or fuck, just 69, it works for us.

[Oztrich]

I had one some years ago and miss it a lot. The guy I was seeing moved out of state and that ended it unfortunately. The comfort level is so good, and it becomes so easy to put together times to see each other. We met multiple times a week, and had sex at least twice a week. I took a video at one point and my wife got hold of it accidentally. She approached me about it and told me I needed to be open about it so there would be no secrecy. Her knowing did nothing to stop our own sex lives at all at the time, and having to try to be careful to time meetings became redundant. That changed with menopause unfortunately, so if I am lucky enough to find the right person here, I have to go back to being down low, and I hate that.

[pole_smoker]

I had one some years ago and miss it a lot. The guy I was seeing moved out of state and that ended it unfortunately. The comfort level is so good, and it becomes so easy to put together times to see each other. We met multiple times a week, and had sex at least twice a week. I took a video at one point and my wife got hold of it accidentally. She approached me about it and told me I needed to be open about it so there would be no secrecy. Her knowing did nothing to stop our own sex lives at all at the time, and having to try to be careful to time meetings became redundant. That changed with menopause unfortunately, so if I am lucky enough to find the right person here, I have to go back to being down low, and I hate that.
Why can't you just tell your wife how you recently met some random guy and sucked him off? She does want you to be honest.

[man4girlgirl4man]

I would really like to meet a guy who is into a regular FOB gay sex relationship with no strings and no commitments agreed by both of us up front. A top with a huge dick, black preferred but not mandatory, who knows the difference between making love and just fucking.

[jem_is_bi]

I would really like to meet a guy who is into a regular FOB gay sex relationship with no strings and no commitments agreed by both of us up front. A top with a huge dick, black preferred but not mandatory, who knows the difference between making love and just fucking. As time goes by, it can be difficult to keep the difference between making love and just fucking a sharp demarcation.

[hungandhard]

I am a whore to a friend of mine who I have been with for a couple of years. He knows he can do anything to me anytime he wants. I am a total bottom and he fucks me sometimes 3 or 4 times a month. I have swallowed so much of his cum that I could fill a gallon jug. My ass is his play ground and he takes it anytime time he wants. Many a night I have passed out with his cum leaking from my hungry ass.

[pole_smoker]

I am a whore to a friend of mine who I have been with for a couple of years. He knows he can do anything to me anytime he wants. I am a total bottom and he fucks me sometimes 3 or 4 times a month. I have swallowed so much of his cum that I could fill a gallon jug. My ass is his play ground and he takes it anytime time he wants. Many a night I have passed out with his cum leaking from my hungry ass.

Does he ever share you with his bi and gay male friends who also cum in your ass?

[Gazbot]

Mine was a regular hookup on the side of whatever else was happening

[billy ball]

No but I am looking. Any takers

[Grub Worm]

I have had a good bud now for the last 6 years. He is an old high school bud, we met when we were 17 through another buddy. We hit it off, he was my first uncut dick, and I was his first peice of ass. I was so into sucking his dick, I wanted to taste his cum. but he was so turned on about fucking me, he pulled away and moved around to my back side where he finished up.

We played till we both married and did not hook back up till 6 years ago. Now its once or twice a month, older but still like our younger days.

[washlb58]

I had just met a FWB, another married man who liked to play with men. We started chatting on-line for awhile and we lived in the same town. We finally saw each other for the first time in March at his auto repair shop after work. I was very excited to totally strip for this man. He just wanted to jerk me off, so he kept his clothes on, too bad. He applied lube on my hard cock and had me cumming on his cement floor in no time.

I just received an e-mail that he was no longer playing outside of marriage, oh darn ! I wanted badly for him to fuck me in the ass, oh well. Back to step one, what a bummer. Anyone in Bellingham, Wa ?

[Fzmr9t]

Met a guy on Craigslist and we've met a couple of times, but it's difficult since he's only in town M-Thu (usually) and we're both married so we have to work around that as well. But the times we awe together awe awesome. Looking forward to our next encounter

[easilyused]

http://imagehost.thasnasty.com/?di=PG48
He can use my mouth or ass ANYTIME!

[quietluvr3]

I'm in the same situation as you and wife knows about it but I can't seem to take the next step and bring a guy into our marriage. Wife is ok with it but I need to find a regular guy, not these theater guys that I meet once in a while.

[LoveBothWorlds]

Yes, regular friends with benefits are so much fun!

[hungandhard]

We have engaged in multiple partners on occasions. I have taken up to 5 loads in my hungry man pussy.

[pole_smoker]

We have engaged in multiple partners on occasions. I have taken up to 5 loads in my hungry man pussy.

All from the same man, or from 5 men with one cum load each, or another number of men with multiple cum loads?

[querty]

im am so fortunate that I have a couple that I play with fairly regularly, whom I consider friends (he's on this site... Hey T!) and friends with Crasy good benefits.
we have the most amazing MMF threesomes. Seems we set records everytime

Pole_smoker, to save everyone time, I'll just say "go fuck yourself you pathetic loser" now vs waiting for some shithead response from you.

[pole_smoker]

im am so fortunate that I have a couple that I play with fairly regularly, whom I consider friends (he's on this site... Hey T!) and friends with Crasy good benefits.
we have the most amazing MMF threesomes. Seems we set records everytime

Pole_smoker, to save everyone time, I'll just say "go fuck yourself you pathetic loser" now vs waiting for some shithead response from you.

If you choose to cheat that's your problem and I retain the right to see you as a inconsiderate douchebag. Don't want to be judged? Then keep your dick and ass in your pants. :rolleyes:

[blatant_bi_guy]

I've got 4 friends...2 of them I met golfing, so when we get together we call it, "Golfing with the guys"...one of them is gay, so it's no big deal...the other is an older married guy, so he kind of needs the alibi.

One of the others is a 21 year old kid my wife introduced me to.

The last is a classic retired bachelor and is into watersports...so there's that.

[pole_smoker]

I've got 4 friends...2 of them I met golfing, so when we get together we call it, "Golfing with the guys"...one of them is gay, so it's no big deal...the other is an older married guy, so he kind of needs the alibi.

One of the others is a 21 year old kid my wife introduced me to.

The last is a classic retired bachelor and is into watersports...so there's that.

The bachelor sounds gay. Do you drink his piss, or have him piss up your ass?

[blatant_bi_guy]

The bachelor sounds gay. Do you drink his piss, or have him piss up your ass?

We'll put it this way...if you can do it with piss, chances are we've done it...and he's at least somewhat bi, because we've done 3ways on at least 3 occasions.

[James72]

Had a long term relationship with a totally gay man for 15years.WE meet in a adult book store in Rochester,Mn.We got to be very close.He is one of the only man that I had very deep feelings for.We would see each other a couple times a month.

[billblueeyes]

I would love to find a great guy for a constant relationship. I would feel safer with just one bisexual then meeting a lot of men,

[Scoody]

I have been fucking a bottom for two years now. The sex with him is awesome. He loves to swallow my cum. He loves my cock in his ass. He is discreet so there are no questions about that. Two months ago I hooked up with a pair of roommates. They were both tops who never fucked each other but wanted someone to be the bottom. I seldom bottom but thought it might be fun. Turns out that these guys made it so pleasurable I have been bottoming for them quite often. Both are multi cummers. One of them has a very large dick and they are relentless. I usually take a couple of loads in the mouth and then at least half a dozen loads in my ass from these two. If I had to choose, I would give up the bottom for these two tops.