fredtyg
Aug 2, 2009, 2:19 PM
Many of you might have read Joshua's post,My Story- Acceptance, where I suggested writing a book on your experiences as I did. Well, here's an attempt at rewriting a part of the book I wrote and ended up deleting. I enjoy reading about other people's coming to grips with their sexuality. This may not be the best example of what my book was like but, if enough people enjoy it, I can post some more stories. Hopefully this isn't too long to be accepted here:
*******
The Steam Baths in My Mid 20s
It was the early 80s and I was in my mid 20s living in Eureka, CA. I'd heard about the Steam Baths and common wisom was that was where all the homos hung out. I'd never been there but, being a homo/ bisexual in almost denial, it was always deep in the back of my mind that I wanted to to check that place out.
Thing was, you didn't want to be seen going into the place. Back then, homosexuality wasn't nearly as accepted as it is now. But, when I'd get to drinking, I'd often start thinking about the Steam Baths except the rare times I was entertaining women. One early summer evening I'd drank just enough to get the homo in me up front and lose the inhibition to head to down there.
The first thing I did, to test the waters, so to speak, was call them on the phone. A guy answers the phone and I find myself almost trembling with nervousness. I ask, "Are there lots of guys down there?", and the guy hangs up on me. I think I wanted him to say something to make me feel more comfortable with my plan but he didn't. No choice but to drive on down there.
It was still light out so I was afraid somebody I knew might see me go in there so I parked almost a block up the street. I was very nervous but I kept telling myself I really wanted to do this so just go for it! I walked around the corner to the front of the place, took a deep breath and went through the front door.
The front room in the place was a lounge/ bar and it was PACKED! Oh shit, did I get even more nervous. I couldn't even look to my sides. I just walked straight ahead up to the bar and told the guy I wanted a steam room, paid the fee, grabbed a beer and went down the hall to my room. Whew! That was almost scary.
I started drinking my beer and jacking off wondering what the point was in coming down here if I was jacking off alone? I rang the room service bell and almost immediately a guy came in and I ordered another beer. He didn't say a thing about me laying there with a hard on. When he comes back and hands me my beer I said, "Feel free to help finish me off if you want". He just nodded, bent over and sucked me off to completion. I thanked him and he left the room. I dressed and left.
I went to my car as fast as I could, still not looking at any of the people in the front lounge. I think I was nervous the whole night, even after getting home.
Next morning, as would be the case with so many of my homosexual encounters, I almost felt ashamed of what I'd done. Wondering if anybody saw me going into the place and, besides, I shouldn't be fagging off, anyway. I'm supposed to be finding a girl, getting married and having kids. What was I thinking last night? But deep down inside, I think I knew I did the right thing.
After that, every time I'd get to drinking a bit, I'd start thinking about the Steam Baths. It wasn't long after that first visit I gathered up the courage to go there again but this time, I told myself, I'll at least try to mingle with the crowd and hopefully establish a few relationships. I decided to try and find a seat at the bar.
I still felt nervous as I parked the car and scurried around the corner to the front door. I felt nervous again walking into the place and didn't look to either side. I just walked straight ahead to the bar and grabbed a seat between two not bad looking guys. I ordered a beer and we shared some small talk. One guy had hair almost to his shoulders and a short beard. I finally told him I was going to rent a steam room and, if he wanted, he could share it with me. He agreed.
We go in there, take off our clothes and almost immediately start kissing and fondling each other. We lay down on the wood benches and carry on.
Back then I didn't know anything of the sexual lubricants like we have today. Best I could think of, and used before, was Vasoline and I didn't even think to bring along that. I got into position for him to put his cock in me but I was too dry. He didn't seem to know what to do about it, either. He just had the head of his cock pushing against my pussy and it wasn't going anywhere. Shame neither of us knew what to do. In hindsight, I should of called room service. I'm sure the guy that sucked me off before might have had something to help.
But we didn't and we eventually gave up on it, kissed a little more and he ended up going home. As he left I asked him to send the other guy we were talking with in and shortly after he left, the other guy came in. We ended up just making out and talking about sex. We finally ended up jacking each other off and went our separate ways. I went home and don't know what he did. Never saw either of those two guys again.
Next morning, as usual, I'm doing the usual WHAT THE HELL DID YOU THINK YOU WERE DOING LAST NIGHT? But, again, despite the botched attempts at intercourse, I think deep inside I knew I did the right thing.
A few weeks later, after a few beers, I went down the the Steam Baths again. I don't know that I ever got over being nervous going in to that place and this time was no exception. The one exception, this time was, I ended up with one of the more memorable sex experiences in my life:
I walked in the front door and was surprised to see the place empty. I sat down at a table and Gene, the guy who worked there and sucked me of on my first visit came out. I ordered a beer and he got himself one and sat down across the table from me. After the usual pleasantries, I simply said "You know the only reason I come here is to get laid". He said, "Hold on a second", and walked down the hallway towards the rooms. He came back right away and asked me to follow him.
I was more than happy to but was surprised we went out the front door and headed to the house right next door. Turns out he lived there with his boyfriend. We enter the house and he says "We don't wear clothes in this house". I was cool with that and dropped mine with his at the bottom of the stairwell. Gene was a slim, taller guy with medium length brown- almost read- curly hair.
His boyfriend, whose name escapes me, came into the room right away. He was naked. They motioned up the stairs and to the second floor we went. They had their bedroom set up for sex, group sex, I would think. They had 3 or 4 mattresses side- by- side. there was a table on one end with bottles of various things. I was to find out later they were various ointments, including lubes, for man to man sex.
I started right away with Gene. He laid down and spread his legs and I slipped right inside of him (Wish we had that lube the last time I came to the Baths). We kissed and fucked hard and heavy until I came inside of him. Then I rolled over and it was his boyfriend's turn with me. I don't recall him being a kisser, though, which was about the only disappointment in the whole night.
After he blew his load in me I did it again with Gene and then I'd roll over and his boyfriend did me again. It was awesome. We switched back and forth at least twice. It could of been 3 times. One of my life's greatest sexual moments, I came to realize later.
Finally, after we were all sexed out, I got up and left. The next morning I believe there was a waking awareness in me that I absolutely loved last night, as much as I still didn't want anyone to know what I'd done, or that I was queer. As the next day wore on, I tried more and more to get that out of my mind. What if the people I work with hear my thoughts? I'M NOT SUPPOSED TO BE DOING THIS! THEY'LL KNOW!
It was still that same summer when I went into the Baths for my last time. This time I went in the middle of the day and, as I recall, I wasn't drinking. I'm not a day drinker. I actually wanted to go there sober, in the middle of the day. My plan was, hopefully, to go to the common steam room and see if I could get the whole room to fuck me. And I was sober. Might I have been coming to accept my homosexuality? I don't know.
So I walk in and I'm still nervous someone will see me but there's on one in the front lounge again. The place is dead. Bummer. So, I pay to go into the main common steam room hoping to see maybe 10 guys that might want to do me but there's only two of them, and I recognize one of them
I was in the National Guard at the time (another reason I didn't want to get caught at this) and Bill was in the Guard, too, although a different unit. He was laying on one bench and some older guy sitting on another. I'd known Bill was queer as he'd seen me come into the Baths my first time, but I didn't see him. He tried to pick me up at Annual Training once because he knew I was queer after seeing me at the Baths, but I ran from that one. Didn't want to get caught fagging off on a military base.
I move over and sit down next to Bill and he acknowledges me by getting the half boner he already had getting harder. I sit there for a while and eventually he seems to start cumming w/o even doing anything. I bend over to him and say "My God, man, you're cumming", in a rather joking manner. He says, "Don't be shy. Get over on it", at which point I slid my lips over his 8" cock (one of the nicest I've ever had the pleasure of) and suck him off to completion.
He got up to leave shortly after, saying he had to go back to work, but said he wanted to see me again and to come up to his house and he'd even let me stick my dick in him. I ended up doing just that and we had sex together off and on for some years.
The other guy just sat there watching us as I was sucking off Bill. After Bill left, I asked the other guy, who looked to be in his 60s, if he wanted his dick sucked. He didn't say anything, but nodded in the affirmative. I knelt down and suck on him for probably five minutes, but he never got hard. Erectile Disfuntction wasn't something people heard of back then, but this guy apparently had it. I didn't know what the problem was and after about five minutes gave up and went home. I was feeling guilty the next day as usual for fagging off but, thinking back, I think I was becoming more accepting of my homo/ bisexuality, if only in incremental steps.
That was the last time I went to the Steam Baths for some reason. Not sure if I was trying too hard to deny my sexuality, or maybe other events led me away. It almost didn't matter because it wasn't too long after that AIDs came into the news. When it became known that bathouses were a place were many were getting AIDS, most bathouses in the state shut down, including the Humboldt Steam Baths.
Looking back I wish I'd taken more advantage of the Baths while they were still here. Then again, what I wanted to do: Group sex and having large numbers of men have bareback sex with me, that might well of had me ending up with what I heard happen to Gene- my first Steam Bath blowjob: AIDS. I heard from another queer guy some years ago that Gene was "very sick". In other words: He had AIDs.
*******
The Steam Baths in My Mid 20s
It was the early 80s and I was in my mid 20s living in Eureka, CA. I'd heard about the Steam Baths and common wisom was that was where all the homos hung out. I'd never been there but, being a homo/ bisexual in almost denial, it was always deep in the back of my mind that I wanted to to check that place out.
Thing was, you didn't want to be seen going into the place. Back then, homosexuality wasn't nearly as accepted as it is now. But, when I'd get to drinking, I'd often start thinking about the Steam Baths except the rare times I was entertaining women. One early summer evening I'd drank just enough to get the homo in me up front and lose the inhibition to head to down there.
The first thing I did, to test the waters, so to speak, was call them on the phone. A guy answers the phone and I find myself almost trembling with nervousness. I ask, "Are there lots of guys down there?", and the guy hangs up on me. I think I wanted him to say something to make me feel more comfortable with my plan but he didn't. No choice but to drive on down there.
It was still light out so I was afraid somebody I knew might see me go in there so I parked almost a block up the street. I was very nervous but I kept telling myself I really wanted to do this so just go for it! I walked around the corner to the front of the place, took a deep breath and went through the front door.
The front room in the place was a lounge/ bar and it was PACKED! Oh shit, did I get even more nervous. I couldn't even look to my sides. I just walked straight ahead up to the bar and told the guy I wanted a steam room, paid the fee, grabbed a beer and went down the hall to my room. Whew! That was almost scary.
I started drinking my beer and jacking off wondering what the point was in coming down here if I was jacking off alone? I rang the room service bell and almost immediately a guy came in and I ordered another beer. He didn't say a thing about me laying there with a hard on. When he comes back and hands me my beer I said, "Feel free to help finish me off if you want". He just nodded, bent over and sucked me off to completion. I thanked him and he left the room. I dressed and left.
I went to my car as fast as I could, still not looking at any of the people in the front lounge. I think I was nervous the whole night, even after getting home.
Next morning, as would be the case with so many of my homosexual encounters, I almost felt ashamed of what I'd done. Wondering if anybody saw me going into the place and, besides, I shouldn't be fagging off, anyway. I'm supposed to be finding a girl, getting married and having kids. What was I thinking last night? But deep down inside, I think I knew I did the right thing.
After that, every time I'd get to drinking a bit, I'd start thinking about the Steam Baths. It wasn't long after that first visit I gathered up the courage to go there again but this time, I told myself, I'll at least try to mingle with the crowd and hopefully establish a few relationships. I decided to try and find a seat at the bar.
I still felt nervous as I parked the car and scurried around the corner to the front door. I felt nervous again walking into the place and didn't look to either side. I just walked straight ahead to the bar and grabbed a seat between two not bad looking guys. I ordered a beer and we shared some small talk. One guy had hair almost to his shoulders and a short beard. I finally told him I was going to rent a steam room and, if he wanted, he could share it with me. He agreed.
We go in there, take off our clothes and almost immediately start kissing and fondling each other. We lay down on the wood benches and carry on.
Back then I didn't know anything of the sexual lubricants like we have today. Best I could think of, and used before, was Vasoline and I didn't even think to bring along that. I got into position for him to put his cock in me but I was too dry. He didn't seem to know what to do about it, either. He just had the head of his cock pushing against my pussy and it wasn't going anywhere. Shame neither of us knew what to do. In hindsight, I should of called room service. I'm sure the guy that sucked me off before might have had something to help.
But we didn't and we eventually gave up on it, kissed a little more and he ended up going home. As he left I asked him to send the other guy we were talking with in and shortly after he left, the other guy came in. We ended up just making out and talking about sex. We finally ended up jacking each other off and went our separate ways. I went home and don't know what he did. Never saw either of those two guys again.
Next morning, as usual, I'm doing the usual WHAT THE HELL DID YOU THINK YOU WERE DOING LAST NIGHT? But, again, despite the botched attempts at intercourse, I think deep inside I knew I did the right thing.
A few weeks later, after a few beers, I went down the the Steam Baths again. I don't know that I ever got over being nervous going in to that place and this time was no exception. The one exception, this time was, I ended up with one of the more memorable sex experiences in my life:
I walked in the front door and was surprised to see the place empty. I sat down at a table and Gene, the guy who worked there and sucked me of on my first visit came out. I ordered a beer and he got himself one and sat down across the table from me. After the usual pleasantries, I simply said "You know the only reason I come here is to get laid". He said, "Hold on a second", and walked down the hallway towards the rooms. He came back right away and asked me to follow him.
I was more than happy to but was surprised we went out the front door and headed to the house right next door. Turns out he lived there with his boyfriend. We enter the house and he says "We don't wear clothes in this house". I was cool with that and dropped mine with his at the bottom of the stairwell. Gene was a slim, taller guy with medium length brown- almost read- curly hair.
His boyfriend, whose name escapes me, came into the room right away. He was naked. They motioned up the stairs and to the second floor we went. They had their bedroom set up for sex, group sex, I would think. They had 3 or 4 mattresses side- by- side. there was a table on one end with bottles of various things. I was to find out later they were various ointments, including lubes, for man to man sex.
I started right away with Gene. He laid down and spread his legs and I slipped right inside of him (Wish we had that lube the last time I came to the Baths). We kissed and fucked hard and heavy until I came inside of him. Then I rolled over and it was his boyfriend's turn with me. I don't recall him being a kisser, though, which was about the only disappointment in the whole night.
After he blew his load in me I did it again with Gene and then I'd roll over and his boyfriend did me again. It was awesome. We switched back and forth at least twice. It could of been 3 times. One of my life's greatest sexual moments, I came to realize later.
Finally, after we were all sexed out, I got up and left. The next morning I believe there was a waking awareness in me that I absolutely loved last night, as much as I still didn't want anyone to know what I'd done, or that I was queer. As the next day wore on, I tried more and more to get that out of my mind. What if the people I work with hear my thoughts? I'M NOT SUPPOSED TO BE DOING THIS! THEY'LL KNOW!
It was still that same summer when I went into the Baths for my last time. This time I went in the middle of the day and, as I recall, I wasn't drinking. I'm not a day drinker. I actually wanted to go there sober, in the middle of the day. My plan was, hopefully, to go to the common steam room and see if I could get the whole room to fuck me. And I was sober. Might I have been coming to accept my homosexuality? I don't know.
So I walk in and I'm still nervous someone will see me but there's on one in the front lounge again. The place is dead. Bummer. So, I pay to go into the main common steam room hoping to see maybe 10 guys that might want to do me but there's only two of them, and I recognize one of them
I was in the National Guard at the time (another reason I didn't want to get caught at this) and Bill was in the Guard, too, although a different unit. He was laying on one bench and some older guy sitting on another. I'd known Bill was queer as he'd seen me come into the Baths my first time, but I didn't see him. He tried to pick me up at Annual Training once because he knew I was queer after seeing me at the Baths, but I ran from that one. Didn't want to get caught fagging off on a military base.
I move over and sit down next to Bill and he acknowledges me by getting the half boner he already had getting harder. I sit there for a while and eventually he seems to start cumming w/o even doing anything. I bend over to him and say "My God, man, you're cumming", in a rather joking manner. He says, "Don't be shy. Get over on it", at which point I slid my lips over his 8" cock (one of the nicest I've ever had the pleasure of) and suck him off to completion.
He got up to leave shortly after, saying he had to go back to work, but said he wanted to see me again and to come up to his house and he'd even let me stick my dick in him. I ended up doing just that and we had sex together off and on for some years.
The other guy just sat there watching us as I was sucking off Bill. After Bill left, I asked the other guy, who looked to be in his 60s, if he wanted his dick sucked. He didn't say anything, but nodded in the affirmative. I knelt down and suck on him for probably five minutes, but he never got hard. Erectile Disfuntction wasn't something people heard of back then, but this guy apparently had it. I didn't know what the problem was and after about five minutes gave up and went home. I was feeling guilty the next day as usual for fagging off but, thinking back, I think I was becoming more accepting of my homo/ bisexuality, if only in incremental steps.
That was the last time I went to the Steam Baths for some reason. Not sure if I was trying too hard to deny my sexuality, or maybe other events led me away. It almost didn't matter because it wasn't too long after that AIDs came into the news. When it became known that bathouses were a place were many were getting AIDS, most bathouses in the state shut down, including the Humboldt Steam Baths.
Looking back I wish I'd taken more advantage of the Baths while they were still here. Then again, what I wanted to do: Group sex and having large numbers of men have bareback sex with me, that might well of had me ending up with what I heard happen to Gene- my first Steam Bath blowjob: AIDS. I heard from another queer guy some years ago that Gene was "very sick". In other words: He had AIDs.