Anal sex

[BBMfan08]

The thread regarding the best lube for anal sex caused me to think of another more pressing question for me. If never engaged in anal sex, but I understand it can be painful the first (or even subsequent) time(s)? Is there anything you can do to lessen the pain so you can enjoy the experience?

:male: :eek:

[KNEADSMORE]

a product called "anal ease"

[MikeW]

Learn to breath and relax and make sure your partner takes his time getting started. He has to work his way in slowly. And practice with a battery operated boyfriend first. Get use to sticking something up there. As for lube, JO HO water based lube is the best I’ve found.

[cutenewlybi]

Anal Ese is not that wonderful i tired it and it still hurt...going slow and easy with plenty of lube is the best bet

[carmic]

I have found Adam and Eves anal lube to be great. I do have some experience receiving and have found this lube the best. I have no problems recommending it.

[elian]

You really can't have too much lube, and patience..and yeah - the feeling isn't always the easiest to get used to - but like others have said - try toys first - it isn't a race - some people just won't care for it - but give it chance for at least 10 minutes with toys first and see.. :)

[chook]

The thread regarding the best lube for anal sex caused me to think of another more pressing question for me. If never engaged in anal sex, but I understand it can be painful the first (or even subsequent) time(s)? Is there anything you can do to lessen the pain so you can enjoy the experience?

:male: :eek:

yeah.....bite on a bullet :rolleyes:


Cheers Chook :bigrin:

[curious44]

If you've never done it before, start off with something small, a dildo about the same size as a broomstick or even your fingers. PLENTY OF LUBE, I like ForPlay the best. It's really slippery and really thick, not watery. Tilt the bottle and see how slow it moves.
Having an enema (Fleet, get it at any drug store).first is a big help. It makes the whole experience more pleasurable because it's cleaner and can help reduce the bloated feeling some may experience.
Go slow! YOU control the speed of entry, not someone else. Turning the dildo in circles as it enters eases entry and feels good too. If it starts to be uncomfortable don't back out all the way. Back out just enough to be on the comfort edge and hold it there for a little bit. As your muscles relax, turn it a little and push it in a little more. Once it's past your sphincter, just hold still and get used to it. Once it's in for a while pump it in and out a few strokes, learn the feeling of being filled up and stroked. Pushing out with your butt muscles also helps ease entry. Once again, use something small enough, this isn't a contest.
Try removing it and re-inserting. You'll be amazed at how easy it goes in once your muscles relax and get used to it. As you stroke, try to put pressure on your prostate. It's a whole new world!
Go up in size as you get used to the smaller ones. You'll find your own comfort level. I gage by circumference. Most that I know can comfortably manage about 1 1/2" diameter or about a 4 3/4" circumference. ENJOY!

[summereclypse]

I like Wet for lube, and as for the anal act its self.... The jury is still out, although I enjoy it more now than I did to begin with. I know my husband enjoys it, so I "treat" him every so often. But, I do somewhat enjoy it myself. I used to HATE it. It was painful, uncomfortable, and just didn't feel right... But with experimenting, taking it slow, me being in control of the speed, and my husband just being still and understanding, oh, and since I'm a :female: I get to play with my clit while we're in the process, in effect giving us both pleasure at something that used to be just for him, it has gotten to where I even enjoy it.

[upones]

patience, lube, lube, fleets enema after emptying out bowels, control the pace of insertion ( have him sit on chair and lower self down) didnt find dildo or vib did mucht to allay the first time discomfort ) but partner worked fingers for a while when starting butt remember lube lube lube butt more important HE MUST USE CONDOM this for his sake too due to bacteria may cause bladder infection

[steve195156]

to get use to anal sex you need to start with lube and a finger first this will ease you into it. after a short time go to a small anal toy. before you know it there will be very little or no pain at all. just remember the lube. adam and eve has the best lube i think.

[miamiuu]

what pleasure if any do women actually get from anal?

[fairbankswingers]

:female: I do not like recieving, and have only tried with Roger once, but it was just too painful and I cannot bring myself to try again, even with us working up and using lots of lube. I think some might be becuase he is really thick, as we were fine with a finger or two and small dildos.

:male: I LOVE receiving anal, have only tried giving once to Michelle...I have reveived it many times from Michelle and her strap on and once with a boyfriend and WOW!!!! Like others on here...lube and lots of it and it will feel like heaven!

[berryhard]

is anal messy ? how do you overcome this ?

[PhoenixRising35]

is anal messy ? how do you overcome this ?

That is entirely up to the recipient. Personally, if I know in advance that I will be receiving anal sex, I try to do a personal enema until it comes out clear. More than likely that will help. Also, due to frequency of how often I do it (I normally do it about 2-3 times a month) I don't have to worry about anal dehydration. So far, that is the easiest method I know to keep it clean, although some fluids will always be there, it is just sort of clear once you have cleaned yourself out. One thing that will help as well is having a pretty regular diet so that it isn't quite as messy. I hope this helps you to "clear" things up. It really isn't that messy in my experience though with these tips.

Also, in terms of the OP, I tend to prefer Astroglide™ because I can purchase it at the local Walmart and it has the best lubrication that I have found at a reasonable price. It can seem like a pretty loose liquid, but I have never had any discomfort with it for years while I have used it. I just wanted to give you another option if you are shopping around. Also, I really spent time to gain a better understanding of my body and things that I do nowadays, I would never have dreamed of doing when I started experimenting. Since then, I can take most medium things and am still researching on "broadening" my horizons, so to speak. Finally, one thing that really helps me to get accustomed was to use butt plugs to widen up before the actual sex since if I am already dilated, it makes it easier for penetration since it is already loose.

[innaminka]

Lube is necessary, but for me the "pain" the "hurt" is what is so pleasurable.
It should be a filling discomfort - which in turn starts the production of endorphins which increases the pleasure.
But be aware of any sharp pain - if that happens - STOP immediately.

The question was asked what pleasure do we get???
This lady gets plenty. Intimacy, endorphin highs, closeness caused by trust, the sense of feeling every square milimetre of your partner ... and fantastic orgasms.

[onewhocares]

From a woman's perspective..........I happen to love anal sex. First in my mind is have a patient, caring and giving lover is most important. Of the lubes mentioned, I happen to love Adam and Eves lube the best. I have tried most of the ones mentioned above,but I like the texture of it and that it does not dry out. For me, I find that when a lover plays with my hole, massaging, probing and sort of flirting with it makes it a great begining. When things come to him actually coming in..slow insertion and me gently rocking back into him works well. I am not one who is into any pain at all, so I would stop if you are uncomfortable. I happen to find leaning over an upholstered chair is perfect for me, then hubby can hold my hips and it is as pleasurable for him as it is for me. Then I will use my strap on and give back to him. Double the pleasure.

Belle

[ayoungmom20]

for me, before i am about to get anal, i always take a shower and wash up first, then a take my finger (soapy) and i stick it in and clean the inside. i love pain so i aint complaining about that at all, but if your one who hates pain then try it in the shower. that was my first and it didnt hurt what so ever. the water acts as a lube. but if your not in the shower, always use your finger and play around so you can get relaxed. and when you get ready to enter it helps to hold your breath as you first enter.. hope this helps but i LOVE anal, its wonderful :tongue:

[Sexual_soujourner]

I agree with the above post, If you can shower, or even better a bath soak in a hot bath it will relax the muscles. Lube is always a must, there is limited ability for the anus to produce lubrication even saliva breaks down fast , otherwise you will get sore and torn tissue. If you or if you have a partner willing slowly work a finger or two working the lubricant applying pressure on the sphincter muscle, be paitent and work around the muscle,as you are massaging it.
relax, and start slowly. Enjoy!

[sensuellesmoothbiguy]

i founf that you have to relax and be open! once you feel a cock slowly slide inside you, you will be hooked as the orgasm that comes from anal stimulation is far more intense that anything else

its also very liberating for a guy to be feminine and lay back and enjoy anal sex in a beautiful passive way

[Hardmyc280]

You know, I have had my girlfriend use a toy on me. It didn't hurt but it didn't really feel pleasurable either. She got more out of it than I think I did. The only thing I think that would feel good is the real thing. I had a guy try anal on me but he was pushing too hard, plus he was pretty thick. I think if I can find a guy thats not so thick, it would feel awsome!

[anteak]

I don't think there is any one best lube to use. As one who has had many many hard cocks and other things shoved up his ass I speak from experience.

When I started putting objects up my butt at a young age I used whatever was available. Spit, soap, I stuck my cock up my friends ass, we were about 10 yo. we used soap. It hurt him, he yelled and pulled away. I know I was in him as my cock was dirty when he pulled away.

Later In HS I had anal sex with two buddies. At that time the slickest stuff we knew was wave set gel. Our mothers used it to set their hair. We fucked each other many times using it. I've used hand lotion, comercial lubes, anything thats slick and slippery. I don't think the lube is as important as going slow and not hurting your partner.

The anus is designed for exit and when used as an entrance it can be uncomfortable. I myself like to feel a little discomfort, not pain but feeling the stretching is enjoyable also.

[sensuellesmoothbiguy]

ubes, there is an insert that u can put in which provides hours long lube inside, but any of the lubes generously applied will be ok, important thing is to allow the guys cock to glide inside without pain so u can begin to enjoy the sensuality of being fucked in its own right without tightness interfering

[larryp1947]

I agree on the Adam and Eve lube or any water based lube when you are using condoms which is smart unless you know the other guy really well. Starting out with you on top so you can lower yourself slowly onto your partner's cock helps too. You can work yourself up and down until you take it all and a little at a time makes it easier. Anal is not for everyone but if you ever get used to it and enjoy it you will come back for more. I always jo while riding a cock and man do I shoot cum all over the place.:)

[opentoideas1964]

Having recently had my first, I pushed against him while spreading my cheeks doggy style, with my sphincter muscles tight as if I was gonna poop and I used a little lube. I loved it.(safely)

[throttleme]

i'm 18 and i've taken a 28 yr old

beat that

[csrakate]

i'm 18 and i've taken a 28 yr old

beat that

Unless it's the mere fact is that you took a cock from a man that was 10 years older than you...I am not sure I see what there is to beat. I mean...age by no means denotes size, ability or finesse.....so if you're gonna brag, by all means let us know what you have to brag about.

[steve617413]

i got you beat i'm 47 and i made love to a 19 year old girl when i was 46...and we went all night long. we wore both of us out by morning... now thats braging...
shit my last girl friend was 13 years younger then me and my wife is 12 years older and i have had a man that was 24 years older so what was the big dial about doing some one only 10 years older?...

[_Joe_]

http://www.attract-women.co.uk/images/fun_images/anal_lube.jpg

[DiamondDog]

^Heh that's an old pic but very funny!

[CuriousJon]

In the old days we used Crisco from the groc store. Start small and go slow. Anyone try the "warming" lubes?

[opentoideas1964]

"m 18 and i've taken a 28 yr old

beat that"
I'm 43 and have a 22 yo boyfriend <g>

[mindfinding]

http://www.attract-women.co.uk/images/fun_images/anal_lube.jpg

HAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH AHAHAA!!!!

oh fudge....HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH AHA!!!!!!!

To priceless.

[green0ne]

Practice makes perfect. I used a butt plug for years, and when I took my first cock it just slid right on in. You have to be very relaxed, and your parner should be very hard (foreplay helps).

[upones]

i planned ahead to try anal by cleansing out with a fleet enema first/the man who took my anal cherry started off rimming then advanced to finger play with lots of lube. he introduced one then another finger till three were in. after playing that way for a while he sat on the edge of the cot (i was in a bathhouse) and had me lower my self down at my on pace. after several "ups and downs" slowly he became fully engaged and we rested for a time then i began the up and down movement finally he laid me on my back with legs over his shoulders and fucked my ass good we stopped several times to "grease the chute" i chose a man with an average size cock (around 6in) to open me up since then i have had a lot larger cocks and have used the same method for most enjoyment always insisted on condom and lots of lube

[Dano111]

I was taught about anal sex by a male outcall. He told me to buy a dildo and practice with lube. When the time came, so to speak, I met a guy video store. I was working out of town, staying in a motel, he met me there.

I gave him oral for almost too long, got my nerve, decided to try it. He laid on his back to give me total control, knowing I was a virgin. Fortunately or unfortunately, he was perhaps 9". It took me perhaps 30 min. to allow total entry.

Then he asked me to lay on my back, entered me just as you would a woman. Then it didn't take long. Thrust became more intense. I knew he was about to cum. Still laying on my back his exit was prompt. He straddled me ripping the condom off. Just as his 9" cock was so large, he had gallons of cum, so to speak. He filled my mouth to overflowing, asking me not to swallow till he could see it. It was so much it came out the sides of my mouth.

I told my GF this story and she wants me to have a guy in me while I'm in her.

[BiBear4U]

1 - AstroGlide Rocks
2 - whatever lube you use - Use plenty
3 - have him start slow and you control the motion until it feels good, once all is plumbed good he can pound away.
4 - :male: I love to receive analy sex beyound measure
5 - If you are new to it - doggie style is best, less pain, more flexibility
6 - I like to be sure I use enma until clear, so if U R Clean no it is not messy
7 - If you are using condoms use more lube
8 - The more you get it, the better it feels, the more you like it, the more you will crave it... at least me anyway:bigrin:

[wss30152]

Practice with dildos. Cocaine helps too....

[Curious55]

This will be my first post on this website. Hopefully I will enjoy conversing with all of you during the time I spend using this website. Hopefully it will be plaseant for all. Anyway, I've read all the do's and don'ts and I do have to say I have learned quite a bit. The first time I tried anal sex was some 30 years ago during the 70's under the influence of herbs. My friend at that time was bi and I didn't know that until that one day that he approached me and opened up to me. It was months later that I let him touch me and at first it was all oral (he did all the oral, I just stroked him). It was some time later that we both had been drinking beer, wine, tequila shooters, smoked that we finally pleasured each other all the way. Since he had experience with that he was very careful and used his fingers first. Well, we got together about once a month for about 1-1/2 years and not each time did we have anal sex, mostly touching each other in the pool, Jacuzzi, full body tans in his backyard, etc. Then he moved out of town due to his job and even though we kept in touch, we never did get together again in person. Recently I have thought about it and part of me wants to get into doing it again and part of me says doing it once before should be enough. Well, staying way is starting to get harder to do but have not done it yet. What has made it easy has been that I don't know anyone that is bi or gay.

[Realist]

I think if you ever have a sexual relationship with another fellow, if it was good, you will always want another one. It's been over 14 years since I've had that and every day I think of it. I have a part-time GF who is everything an older guy like me should want, but I still miss the interaction with a male. If you can be with him and you want to be with him, don't waste too much time, because someday you may not be able to be with him!

'Nuff said

[Curious55]

Realist......

You make a lot of sense and what you said is very true. Unfortunately, we have lost touch with one another some 20 years ago. That is why I said that I currently don't know anyone that is bi or gay. I know that I'm probably surrounded by them but I have not opened up about this, actually until today. Uh-oh...just realized that's what I did by writing my first response....

[Realist]

In August, I was chatting with a fellow who wanted to experience his first time being with a guy. I advised him to look into Craigslist. He wrote exactly what he was feeling urges for, and within a few days he connected with a fellow with the same interests. Now, I'm sure many people place ads and never receive any interested parties, but his luck was excellent. Just thought you might could try it. It's free and there's probably a town near you from where they post.

[Atopalonelystar]

Wow!! Great question!! Listen-

Everyone is right about a lot of things... but I'd like to further their comments.

Someone ask how or why anal play can be pleasurable to women.

First and foremost there are sexually sensitive nerve endings in and around the anus in both men and women. Men have the women's equivalent of the Gspot which of course is the prostate and when stimulated can be highly orgasmic. So, for men it's almost a double pleaser. In women, on the other hand, as I mentioned the anus is very sensitive to stimuli- When a woman is anally penetrated it gives her a sense of fullness not just anally but vaginally as well. Most often stimulating her Gspot via anal penetration. Double penetration- (anus and vagina) can be the most satisfying sexual experience.

LUBE- Very essential when having anal sex BECAUSE the anus does NOT self-lubricate like the vagina does. Hence, the phrase, "dry fuck". To prevent minor tearing or creating anal fishers (small tears) and to extremely reduce the initial discomfort of penetration, lube is a MUST-HAVE.

Relaxing- Using deep breathing techniques to help yourself relax will also reduce the discomfort. Relaxing is probably the most important thing to focus on. However, you may help your partner with the initial penetration by slightly pushing with your anal muscles as the head of his penis or toy is pressing against the anus. Slowly begin to relax those muscles while the penis or toy is still pushing inward. As you relax your anus, it will slowly allow your partner to penetrate you by grabbing at the head, pulling it in side to some degree. Using this technique can actually be quite pleasurable and reduce the pain considerably.

HTH!!

[twinspiritrev]

Anal play can be very exciting and erotic if done properly. (Factoid) Sex any kind of sex is 90% mental and only 10% physical. There are many ways to have anal fun but first let me say three (3) very important words about it.

Preparation, Preparation, Preparation,

First, mentally prepare your self for anal play if you think of your ass as an erogenous zone and think of all the things you would like about it then you will enjoy it more when the time comes.
Second, I can’t stress this one enough “CLEANLYNESS” I know common since all ready tells you that. Think of it first as a health matter no one wants a case of E-Coli I know I don’t. And personally I don’t find even the slightest trace of fecal matter or the smell enjoyable and I assume that most people don’t.
And last but not least foreplay, lots and lots of foreplay when it comes to the anus. When receiving I like to start out on my back with a pillow or two under my ass, knees pulled up as far as I can and my legs spread wide. Doggie style is fine too witch ever you prefer its all good.
Communication is the key element here. Don’t be afraid to tell your partner what you want them to do. I like soft caressing and kissing the inner thighs working your way slowly towards the anus kissing and licking around the ass-hole teasing it this way for a while builds the anticipation of what’s to come. Then lightly touching and licking the hole softly rubbing it slowly entering a little at a time going in deeper each time alternating between your tongue and finger. Using a lot of saliva, lube is not needed for this. If you prefer a small dildo can be used at this point. This can be fun and enjoyable for a man or a woman and can be taken all the way to an orgasm.

Now for even more fun how about a cock in your ass? For this I suggest a generous amount of good quality lube in and around your ass hole and on his cock. On your back or from behind witch ever you prefer. Again communication is key, start slow by rubbing the tip of it around the ass hole then slowly press a little harder. When feel your hole open a little as the tip go’s in stop there and move it around and in and out a little. Then gently push a little more and just as the head pop’s in stop there for a moment and let your self relax. You may feel a little pain at this point. I've come to love that little bit of pain it’s not so much pain but a wonderful sharp sensation of pleasure when you know you have a hard cock in your ass. (remember 90% mental) Then slide the rest of it in nice and slow and pull it all the way out and back in. Nice long slow strokes all the way in and out gradually picking up the pace moving a little harder and faster. There should be no more pain now just a wonderful sensation of pleasure. Now find a good pace and enjoy a good ole ass fucking.

[elastisexual]

i find that bending over something and getting sexed from behind stimulates the P SPOT as i like to call it. i also clean out after each poop.and lube and toy imediatly after to open it up.I am a dresser so for me and my bf anal is our way of me being his girl.I consider any pain something i offer my lover.To be in pain for the plesure of my lover is to show how deep my love is.Smaller is better for me and i generaly like men with small to average size penis anyway.I agree that the shower is a great place for anal sex,many nites when my bf gets home i have the shower ready for him
i undress him and we shower together and he sexes me.Then its out and dry time.dinner and later at nite i can usualy get to suck him.As for the P spot where the prostrate is stimulated i found that its the direction that matters most.and WOW the p spot gasms are awsome.

[Hardon-Bi69-Ohio]

What I have tryed w/ Anal sex w/ a big dildo is "ASTROGLIDE GEL" I hav e used that on my 6. 5 1/2" thick Dildo & Works Wonders as long as I Gide it in slowely & Easy. Best thing that I ever had then KY.

[parkerbi]

sorry. no experience on this. I wanna have a try on this fun too.

[lookn0ver]

patience~patience~patience:eek: start small and work up.learn about keeping it clean. NEVER NEVER NEVER go in the ass then right in the pussy or you'll be working on healing a nasty infection and be regretting your poor choice. ass play is very erotic shouldn't be forced on someone who doesn't want it until they are ready to commit to the challenge. my best advice is to be well informed on this subject and enjoy it without guilt with only a partner you trust:love87:

http://www.analsexyes.com/

http://www.enemas4fun.com/information/enemas/the-enema-primer.html

[smokey]

A gay aquintance when asked that suggested getting drunk first. :bigrin::bigrin::bigrin:

I have always liked coconut oil for anal sex both doing it and getting it done and a lot of finger and tongue foreplay goes a long way to easing any pain but more important is a considerate and gentle partner... getting in is the touchy part but once in and accomadated you can fuck ass as vigoriously as a pussy.

[DiamondDog]

I'm not into receptive anal sex because it doesn't do anything for me and it's not pleasurable to me.

That being said enemas/douching are actually bad for you, cause problems, and are not needed at all if you have a healthy diet and everything works normally as it should.

Step 1 – warm shower, gently clean around the outside.

Step 2 – You’re done!

That’s right, if you have a normal healthy bowel habit you are now clean.

There is no need for enemas or douches. In fact an enema or douche can cause more problems than they solve and have been implicated in the increased transmission of STIs (inc HIV).

DON’T DOUCH BEFORE GETTING FUCKED. This actually puts you at a higher risk for becoming infected with HIV. Douching can wash away helpful or "good" bacteria in the mucous membrane lining your ass as well as reducing your natural lubrication. This increases the friction of being fucked, which can cause tears in the rectum and anus. It's also not good to douche after being fucked since this could spread the virus around even more. Taking a crap afterwards is a safer bet.

That being said when you use lubes don't use lubes that can't be used with latex/poly condoms like coconut oil.

[celticmagic]

i founf that you have to relax and be open! once you feel a cock slowly slide inside you, you will be hooked as the orgasm that comes from anal stimulation is far more intense that anything else

its also very liberating for a guy to be feminine and lay back and enjoy anal sex in a beautiful passive way
I agree with you! It is so nice and relaxing to feel feminine while receiving anal sex. Since I do enjoy to have a guy doing anal on me, I 'rather will have it as a "Women" and will also be dressed like one.

[wss30152]

Practice with small things then work your way up to fist sized objects

[clware706]

The thread regarding the best lube for anal sex caused me to think of another more pressing question for me. If never engaged in anal sex, but I understand it can be painful the first (or even subsequent) time(s)? Is there anything you can do to lessen the pain so you can enjoy the experience?

:male: :eek:

To honestly answer there is no right way or the right lube. Its all depends if the love for it is there. I love to receive a good pounding and i use no lube except spitt and most of the time not that. Just go slow and if the partner dose not want to go that route than he/she dont get to do it at all.
:bipride:

[Justin Chad Taylor]

A lot of lube amd patience will make it a great experience:cool:

[foreverbi]

If you have an experienced and caring lover he can fuck you without any pain at all. The secret is to take your time & use plenty of lube. It helps if you have played with a dildo or vibrator first just to make sure you are prepared for his love muscle. Gawd it feels goooood!:bigrin:

[swmnkdinthervr]

what pleasure if any do women actually get from anal?

My wife has incredible orgasms from anal...she readily squirts during that play!!!

[yohko469]

i love Anal sex, and most of the time have no need for artificial lube, my own juice works wonders..i get ridiculously wet. and the pain, or hurt is nice, never too much. Altho the first time i just about DIED. and cause i'm a woman and bi, sometimes there is DP( talk about filling) or having a woman lick or suck on my clit during is PURE BLISS
:)

[Justin Chad Taylor]

:bipride:The first time I had anal sex my friend went vey gently. He only was able to get the head of his penis into my anus. We also used lots of lube. It took a couple of sessions until he was able to get his entire penis in me. After a few times it felt so wonderful and the thought of him inside me made it very pleasurable! So in my final words it takes patience, lube, and the right person to make it a wonderful experience!!!:three:

[sebax]

that is something i have not mastered heheeh
I tried it three times in my life and I just about died , cried, and felt very uncomfortable.. everytime I felt the head of a penis there, I would tense up..
somethings are not for everyone and I think this might be it for me heehhe.
I tried to relax and relax and used lots lots of lube but I had problems and I lost the drive... :(