So confused...

[Betty boop2]

Hi everyone:)
I am a married mother of 5 beautiful kids, 3 are adults and out of the home, leaving us with 2 daughters aged 6yrs and 12yrs.

I am happy with my marriage, but like all relationships we have had our ups and downs, but no major issues have been involved.

I have always been bi-curious, my husband has always known this and as most males, when I told him of my experience with a woman before we met, he was very interested in what happened, but we have both agreed that if either of us were interested in another person, be it male or female, we would give eachother the dignity of letting the other know, so we could go our own seperate way.

I have a close friend, we have both expressed our interest in eachother, nothing has happened sexually, we do talk alot about the future and we would like to try a relationship, which would mean I would have to leave my husband, and make out like this kinda just happened later on down the track.

I do not want to break my family up, my children are very close to their father and he is a good man, I just wish we could somehow work this into our relationship, I have thought about having all three of us in a relationship, Im not sure how I would react seeing my husband with her, nor am I sure how it would affect her as she suffers from depression from time to time.
My other insecurities are, what if they decide they dont want me in the relationship after a while.

Please if there is anyone here that has had the same type of situation happen, I would be greatful to hear how things turned out.
I know in my heart I am very selfish thinking about myself over my family, if I had a husband that was never there, or abusive, I wouldnt hesitate to leave him for her, but thats not the case.
I just cant help loving them both and wanting them both.

[shameless agitator]

Let your husband know how you feel & tell him that you're interested in a relationship with your friend. All things considered, he may be okay with you doing that without ending your marriage. Of course he also may not, but you'll never know if you don't talk to him about it. I would advise against a 3 way relationship, at least at first. It would probably be better for you to have a 2 way relationship with each of them & hopefully they can be friends. If your husband does say that you have to choose & can only have one or the other, at least then you know what the situation is. I don't envy you the decision if it comes to that. I'm in kind of the same spot at the moment with a gf who has said she'll step aside if I find someone else, but what I really want is a relationship with her and a man. Best of luck to you & keep us posted.

[the mage]

Its a doable thing if he does not go nuts on you.
Having a 3rd live in will not work specialy with kids still there, but a friend with benefits can work.