Complete Strangers vs Best Friends

[eyewarepanties]

I am just curious as to why it is that we as bisexuals or what ever, can get on the internet and enter chat rooms and be able to talk freely with people we don't even know and feel good about it? Here we discuss wanting to be with a guy/girl for bisexual reasons and what we would love to do to each other and feel very comfortable chatting with these people but we would never approach a true friend and discuss these same topics. Why? I find it very strange that I can chat with a total stranger about sucking his cock yet would never ask a friend if I could suck his. Anyone else feel this way?
Eyeware

[CHOCOLATECITY32]

u know i feel the same way i could hold a long conversation with a stranger but could never hold a conversation with a family member on the same subject but 2 get deeper it only stops at certain spots..plus if i conversate with someone it's automatic that they be openminded and willind 2 converse about anything ..not 2 mention that ppl nowadays r so secretive and they only conversate 2 a limit b/c they can not trust ppl...can u blame them...

[deletetacount123]

Its just easier to talk to someone that doesn;t know you than it is with someone that does know you.

I think cause you won't be judged by the person that knows you. Perhaps.

[DiamondDog]

I openly talk about my sexuality in front of my friends, that is if they mention their sexuality, their sex lives, and we're talking about sex.

Even the heterosexual male ones.

They talk about the women that they've had sex with or what they've done or who they want to do and I'll talk about the men I've dated or the guy I'm having a relationship/getting to know as a partner/potential partner. Or I will talk about how I enjoy giving dominant oral sex to women, doing consensual SM to women, how I would gladly fist a woman, and how I'd enjoy being with a man and a woman at the same time for sex.

I have talked about rimming, other types of sex, sex using toys and doing erotic/sexual bondage/SM in front of both hetero/bi/gay/trans friends and it's not a big deal at all to me since many times they'll get curious about these types of sex because we've talked about them.

I've even talked to hetero/gay/bi friends about how I enjoy watching and reading about fisting and how I'd like to explore this on the giving end with both a man and a woman. Not elbow deep fisting mind you, only a hand, as I have small hands. ;) :)

I've even gotten my hetero male friends to do non-erotic/non-sexual SM to me like I let my friend and his hetero roommate whip me with branches and we'll spank each other all clothed in public for fun.

Also if someone asks me a question I have no problem answering it as nothing offends me.

For example when I came out to my mom she asked if I was a top or a bottom.

Without going into too much info I told her how I simply don't do anal sex as I'm not wired for receptive anal sex like a gay male friend of our family who is a bottom is, and I don't go by those labels since not every man or woman does, or wants to.

Also when I told her how I love bondage (as I've put basic rope harnesses on myself just for fun when I go about my day at home) she just told me to be careful who I let tie me up, and how I should be careful who I tie up.

My mom and I have talked about my attractions since when I was growing up she thought I was going to eventually be partnered with a woman.

I've told her (and she agrees with me based on what we've talked about) that I probably do lean more towards men in general than women; but how part of me does like women too.

My hetero aunt and I were talking about my sexuality when I came out to her. We've talked about the writings of de Sade, and I've told her how I enjoy doing SM with men and women and how I've flogged/paddled men and women and how I have let a man whip me with a branch but how this was not erotic/sexual SM.

My aunt and I have talked about how words change and how words that were once slurs or negative can now be seen in a positive way when they're used by the right people. Words like faggot, queer, dyke, nigger, cunt, bitch, slut, whore, and other words which are traditional slurs are used by bigots but when they are changed and used in a positive way and not as sexual/racial/sexist/bigoted slurs the hatred associated with them away and they are seen as positive words.

I've even talked to my doctor about my sexuality, safer sex, and how I'm into bondage/SM/kink as these are things that you should be talking about with a medical doctor that you're seeing.

I have also talked about these subjects with ex-bosses of mine as we were talking about kink, STDs, and HIV/AIDS as I was out to my bosses and co-workers and it wasn't a big deal at all.

I realize that I grew up in a VERY liberal family and friends, compared to most people; but that's just how things were for me.

I think most of it has to do with the fact that I don't care if it makes people uncomfortable as it's their problem and not mine and I know lots of men who are completely out as gay/bi and it's not a big deal at all, and it hasn't been for me either. :)

[ghytifrdnr]

It's true that we seem to more at ease talking with someone who we'll likely never meet and who we don't have to talk to if things don't turn well. We can just ignore them. That's hard to do with someone who you may see face-to-face every day.

But we may be overlooking one other important point. When we enter into these forums and chatrooms online we have a reasonable expectation of meeting people who share a somewhat similar viewpoint. By choosing what sites we visit we are preselecting for a sympathetic community.

:2cents:

[onewhocares]

Well I happen to be someone who is very comfortable speaking with anyone, be they stranger or friend about sex, intimacy, relationship or whatever. It just seems to be my gift. I have often heard that I am a good listener and also feel that I am the most non judgemental person I know which helps. I do enjoy chatting with people from this site, as stated by another...like minded people will tend to gather at the same point of view many times.

I know that when I want an honest opinion, I may ask a stranger. There perceptions are often clear and unbiased.

[CardShark]

My experience with this is different i think. :rolleyes: I never really had a bisexual fantasy or desire very much as a teen. Up until a few years ago, I was complety hetro. It was my best friends that approached me about it. Not the other way around. My best friend and his wife approached me ummmm about four years ago and I would say that was my first experience of it in any way shape or form. Was a big fantasy for his wife and she more or less talked to me about it and opened my eyes i guess you could say to the whole thing. I watched my first bisex porno with them and was the first time i'd ever seen two guys doing anything towards one another. Yeah yeah i know i lived in a box LOL. My reaction towards it was way different than what I thought it would be. Was really kinda hot :tong: course her being there getting turned about the whole deal helped! I still definately prefer girls, but last few years i've opened my mind to other things and other people. :bigrin: My best friends are the direct cause of this. :rolleyes: I don't think a complete stranger could have had the same effect or result.

[Diana_TS]

I feel a little different then most of you, however, I do agree it is easier to discuss sexual, personal, things with strangers in a chat room. About the same as a young person breaking up with a g/f/b/f over the phone being easier then facing them. However I find it very easy to talk to true friends (bi/straight or gay). I have always been very open with my real friends. Of course casual friends such as you find at work, etc, I do not reveal my true sexual desires to. :female: .....inclinations

[biwords]

[QUOTE=DiamondDog]...I don't care if it makes people uncomfortable as it's their problem and not mine QUOTE]

This must have been mis-expressed, since you can't have meant that you're indifferent to hurting people.

[biwords]

It's true that we seem to more at ease talking with someone who we'll likely never meet and who we don't have to talk to if things don't turn well. We can just ignore them. That's hard to do with someone who you may see face-to-face every day.

But we may be overlooking one other important point. When we enter into these forums and chatrooms online we have a reasonable expectation of meeting people who share a somewhat similar viewpoint. By choosing what sites we visit we are preselecting for a sympathetic community.

:2cents:

This seems to completely answer the question that started this thread.

[eyewarepanties]

It's true that we seem to more at ease talking with someone who we'll likely never meet and who we don't have to talk to if things don't turn well. We can just ignore them. That's hard to do with someone who you may see face-to-face every day.

But we may be overlooking one other important point. When we enter into these forums and chatrooms online we have a reasonable expectation of meeting people who share a somewhat similar viewpoint. By choosing what sites we visit we are preselecting for a sympathetic community.

:2cents:

Yes you are completly correct about us entering chatrooms knowing we will meet the kind of people with whom we would share the same interest in and there for be very comfortable with in our chats. Thanks for your reply.
Eyeware