how to piss off the site members lol

[Long Duck Dong]

one thing to do is post lol

seriously, we do have a major issue arising in the forum and its not trolling.... its over sensitivity and thread jacking

the first thing that posters need to understand, is this is a public forum, not their home or their personal space...
the trouble with forums is that people perceive posts in a forum, as if the words were said to them in person... thats a big mistake....

in a persons home or personal space, then sure, they have the right to speak up and deal with the issue.... in a public forum, its different.... by speaking up and objecting to the way people express themselves, we start limiting forms of expression and posting... and it starts impacting on the easy flowing nature of the forum

now there is a big difference between offensive posting and taking offense to the words in a post

if the words are not offensive or a issue, then the person is taking offense and making it a issue....and the thread gets hijacked... then people read the threads and think * ok we can't post about that, its not against the rules, its cos it creates conflict and forum disruption

I see words and things in the forum that go against my nature, and my own personal feelings and thoughts... and I could object.... but I can't see the point of thread jacking, just to complain....

the moment I thread jack, I am diverting the thread from its original theme and turning it into a * my issue * thread, that is immediately stopping the thread creator and posters from having their enjoyment

now I am not saying that people don't have the right to be offended or the right to complain... cos they do... let me make that quite clear

however, there is a point where people have the right to post and express their opinions and have objectors post their opinions in a separate thread, to avoid thread jacking and conflict... and so the forum flows.....

part of the issue I have now, is not people that object to my opinion or my wording, but the fact that, out of respect for them, I don't post about certain things...that has impacted on my ability to write in the forum and that is something that a few posters may be finding

now the fact that I am not posting about some things, is a non issue...but if others are doing the same.... we start to see a hole in the types of posts that we would normally see in the forum.... and since people are not seeing these types of threads, they may stop reading the forum...

the trouble is, there is no solution that will work....

[Mrs.F]

I agree LDD! I am one that has taken offense to some threads and reading this makes a good point. I, for one am going to try and be better about this. :color:

[noostoo]

Well said LDD - I've been feeling a lot of the same things in the last week.

[arana]

So are you saying that when you post a thread all you want is to see feed back that agrees with what you say and has no negative opinions and that if they do they should start a completely new negative thread?

Do you realize that some of the same people that go along with this (which I'm not saying is bad) opinion are the same ones that are the culprits at instigating and aggrevating a situation and making threads more volatile then need be? I do agree that some take things way too personal....and it's also easy to misread something. I've had some posts bring out the worst in me because of lack of information within the context of what the person is trying to convey and made them sound very heartless or rude when they really weren't.

I think respect for other's opinions and learning to curb one's own tongue would be better than starting thread after thread about one subject. It's less confusing to have a flow of conversations and opinons without having to figure out what someone is talking about from another thread that could be long gone by the time someone reads it.

Did I just hijack you Duckster? :tong: Happy April Fools Day!

[gjmwbimale48]

how to piss off the site members: ok... i'll give it a shot......

1. Lets face it New Zealand is just a tiny isolated island country best suited for misfits and nare-do-wells from other english speaking counties who are too lackadaisical or educationally challenged to learn another language.... politically they are like your college friend who volunteers to help you move, spends his time snooping in your boxes, takes the lightest things out to the truck one piece at a time, pretends to be lifting his corner of the sofa while every one else is actually carrying all the weight,and then afterwards drinks most of the beer and complains about the toppings on the pizza.....

2. Wiccians???? OMG Those are just tree hugging spooks that collect crystals, unicorn figurines, and observe their holidays in regard to the astronomical cycles. Why can't they just stop the chanting and incense burning and follow Christ???

3. At the time that a person gets too old to completely take care of themselves we should do them and society a favor by placing them in a convalescence home.

4. Anyone still living with their ex-partner is either afraid of being lonely,insecure about finding another relationship, or is a glutton for self punishment.

5. Seriously, adults that plaster the walls of their abodes with with glossy fantasy posters that they haven't even framed, need to grow up, buy a few decorating magazines, and admit that they aren't still living in a college dorm room. (And then to take pictures of them and post them here for the rest of us to see is just sooo..... tacky!!)

6. People that dedicate whole rooms of their house to a mismatched collection of out dated computer components really need to consider a trip to the local electronics store and upgrade 21 century technology... and donate their old systems to some 3rd world country where a pocket calculator and a digital watch are still considered high tech.

7. And give me a break.... anyone on this site that is averaging more than 1 post per day seriously needs to get a life, go outside and get some fresh air, get a hobby that doesn't include a keyboard, and join the real world again.

Now... if in fact i actually believed any of the things that i just typed, and decided to use this forum to stick them right in your face are you telling me that you would not find some offense in any of them and would just sit back and and let me continue to post such crap without getting back in my face?? I very strongly doubt it.

now granted i lumped all these statements together, and in that way they seem like a personal affront, but had i spread them out into 7 different threads i think they would also have a cumulative affect as well....

My point is in a forum like this many of a person's opinions, beliefs, and prejudices are just better left unstated, for the greater good and in the name of a civil and non-insulting environment.

As a post note..... i DO NOT believe any of that drivel that i spewed in 1-7 above. its just my way of making a point that some "opinions" even on a site like this can cause anger, resentment, or conflict, leading to either banning or self expulsion.

[sixthickcut]

say what u want ...if somebody dosn't like it they can post back at u...freedom of speech is the core issue here....hijack ur thread back with another post...sixthickcut

[littlerayofsunshine]

I find pissed off people go well with a nice Chianti and fava beans. :bigrin:


*SlllllluuuuuuuuuurrrrrrrrrrPppppppppppppp*

[Mrs.F]

I agree LDD! I am one that has taken offense to some threads and reading this makes a good point. I, for one am going to try and be better about this. :color:

While I stated that I agreed with LDD, it doesn't mean that I won't post my opinion at any time, it just means that if someone says something I don't understand or like I will try not to take it personally and go off on a rampage. Sometimes that's a hard thing to do for me. :rolleyes:

[Omnivore]

Good thread, Long Duck Dong, I agree.

Feeding a troll, in particular, just breeds more trolls.

[pecker]

How about that Mister bi.com SHRINK

[Long Duck Dong]

lol gjmwbimale48

1 nz is also full of sheep shaggers...tho I am unique, I perfer kangaroos...lol

2 wiccans hug trees ??? damm, I was wondering why people looked at me wrong... I thought it was meant to be tree humping

3 old people should be put in the freezer, they last longer

4 I only live with my ex, cos I can't shoot her

5 you leave my pictures alone.... they are hiding the cum stains on the wall

6 there is nothing wrong with my old dated, out moded, heap of shit computer....well nothing a few $1000 wouldn't fix lol

7 thats why I am buying a voice dictated lap top lol

actually, I wouldn't take offense over your opinion.... cos in a lot of ways, your opinion holds a lot of truth for aspects of my life...

that and i am laughing too much to write

[pecker]

Round two..............Ithink you lost the first one he he he!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!lld

[Long Duck Dong]

???? pecker,

you are gonna need to explain that to me cos I am totally lost....

[Herbwoman39]

???? pecker,

you are gonna need to explain that to me cos I am totally lost....


Being lost can be fun! That way you can discover new ways of finding yourself. OR you can choose to sit on the curb and watch people go by. :bigrin:

Don't mind my babblefest. It's late. :)

Awwww crap! Did I just jack the thread? Sawwy. ;)

[Long Duck Dong]

So are you saying that when you post a thread all you want is to see feed back that agrees with what you say and has no negative opinions and that if they do they should start a completely new negative thread?


mmm nope..... lol

I personally don't worry if people don't share my views, I encourage a difference of opinion, cos it helps me revise my opinion and thru being in bisexual.com, I have learnt a lot more about myself thru debating in posts and threads

the sort of issue i have... is like the following

1 ) the title is * i love slim to average person, why are there not more of them ?? *
is that truly offensive ??? the person is stating their preference and asking a question....
it can be read as the person is implying that most people are weight challenged, that many people in bisexual.com are weight challenged or that they are having trouble finding people that suit their preference

2 ) I love to be with she males......
now its regarded that the word is offensive... but the person is speaking about a specific type of partner....a person that is feminine with a penis....and not aiming to offend, and the word * she male * defines the subject matter clearly

in both cases, people are gonna take offense and thread jack about their personal opinion... thats the issue right there....
people should be allowed to disagree and have a difference of opinion....
but do they need to post in a thread about looking for slim to average people, about their issues about weight, weight loss, the aspects of dealing with weight and their offense over the fact that the person is not looking for people of bigger builds or that the person doesn't find bigger builds attractive

in the second case, people may disagree with the word *she male *... but does the thread require them to post telling how they feel about the word, and how its offensive to some groups of people, and how the porn industry uses it in a manner that others deem to be offensive and demeaning

again it comes back to a persons right to post and express their opinion.... and again I accept we all have that right.... but in some cases, does a persons personal opinion, need to be expressed in some threads ???

[Long Duck Dong]

lol pecker, I spend 99% of my life lost.... cos the moment I say I know where I am, then I am saying that I am in a place in my life that I have already covered... and the chances to learn heaps are halved lol

[Solomon]

truthfully, i've heard it said many times that in general, the number one fear among people is public speaking.

i'm thinking that that might be what alot of people that appear to be threadjacking are actually doing, is learning to cope and process that fear in an environment of personal safety. so they can practice on how to word things, proper contexts, listening skills, and an entire host of other issues that might contribute to the poster feeling more confident with actually speaking in a public setting.

and it's definately a great thing to have feedback letting people know when they're taking things too personal as well.

not to mention that forums allow for a much more interactive approach to raising one's awareness all the way around, rather than simply being at the mercy of propoganda. :cool:

[Domino]

Shit I just posted. Would someone plase hurry up and attack me so I can be a peace.

[Long Duck Dong]

lol I fully agree...lol

part of the issue for any poster, is that the forum is independent of any country
and so we can't apply the PC rules to the forum, without infringing on a persons rights to freedom of speech and expression

by posting a list of acceptable, and non acceptable words, we are not improving the situation but enforcing the idea that people must conform in speech and posting....
what is acceptable in the us, is not acceptable in nz....the term * people of colour * is regarded as a racist term in nz and offensive to maori people
so it becomes a situation of * i am gonna get shot, its just i don't know what direction the bullet is coming from *

its ending up that I am using clincial, sterile terms to post friendly cuddly posts, in a effort to placate people in the forum, and losing part of the quirky nature in which i normally post

for me the forum is a place where I could throw out a random anonymous post, about things that I can't talk about in real life.....sadly real life is intruding in the forum and taking away that pleasure

[Solomon]

that's a really good point about international issues an language also. when i migrated to Canada i know that i tended (still do to some point lol) to piss some people off when i would say "i don't care" in reference to certain things up here.

people in Canada however, would say "i don't mind" and i would instantly think they're being indecisive.

not to mention the chaos in general of men and women speak in different tongues anyways lol.

so yeah, when it becomes an international thing it's definately gonna be a bumpy ride for awhile lol!

no wonder it's absolutely astounding thing to have the U.N. agree about anything lol

[Solomon]

Shit I just posted. Would someone plase hurry up and attack me so I can be a peace.

huh? i'm confused...

[rupertbare]

As i was saying just the other day, British politics stink. Blair is an idiot and we need a far right government to turn us all into chocolate cake.

Nothing like jacking a thread.......
..........and this is nothing like jacking a thread.

LDD.......well expressed mate......but stay off the kangs....they can get addictive.

R x

[Long Duck Dong]

hugs ya rupert.... been wondering where the hell you are, lol

[biandu]

Long-
u make me wet! in the best way possible.

[biandu]

1 nz is also full of sheep shaggers...tho I am unique, I perfer kangaroos...lol





Q. Do you know how New Zealanders practice safe sex?
A. They spray paint X's on the back of the sheep that kick!

[Herbwoman39]

Sorry about that bit of fluff I posted last night. That's what I get for trying to be coherent after spending the day at Disney.

While I feel that you have a valid point, it worries me that you feel you can't be yourself around here anymore. Sure there have been some sensitivity issues of late caused by trolls and misunderstandings. *However* in order to return to some sense of normalcy, shouldn't we all just go back to the way we were before? Why treat things as though they are any different from, say, four months ago (as I arbitrarily pull a number out of my hat)?

Post what you feel like posting IN the way you feel like posting it. You see, that's one of the great things about the US, we all have the right to be offended. There are so many different people here that something is going to offend someone somewhere. They can learn how to deal with being in a multi-cultural world.

It's good to be offended sometimes because when we consider *why* that thing offends us, we usually discover that it's social programming. That, in turn, promoted personal growth.

So be yourself luv. I'd hate to see you cheat yourself and us by being someone you're not.

<HUGS>

~Maria~

[SweetBlackAngel]

I find pissed off people go well with a nice Chianti and fava beans. :bigrin:


*SlllllluuuuuuuuuurrrrrrrrrrPppppppppppppp*

*snork*

Good one. :tong: