(Hidden) Bisexual Dress Codes and Language

[happyjoe68]

I'm a bit thick when it comes to picking up hints, even bl**dy obvious ones, from men, let alone women. And my gaydar/bidar suffers from constant interference :bigrin:

So, I would like to know, should they even exist, whether there are certain types of clothing, jewellery, fashion accessories, etc., when worn, or worn in a certain fashion, that says the wearer is bi. I know that there are, and have been in the past, especially amongst the gay people, certain styles of dress that say "I'm gay" to other gay people, but would perhaps be unremarked upon by straights, so perhaps there are things I'm missing.

For instance, I've both ears pierced, where as straight men (in the UK at least) have the left pierced, and gay men the right. Well, ok, its an old-ish stereotype, but you get the picture

Also, there must be certain keys words and phrases that Bi people use to announce there sexuality like gay people do. A favourite gay phrase I like is "a friend of Dorothy's", a reference to the Wizard of Oz, so perhaps there must be things I'm missing (besides a nice boy and nice girl to settle down with) ;)

[happyjoe68]

"especially amongst the gay people". I cant believe I said that - I meant gay community. Apologies

[tom_uk]

think its a clue when your mates carry you to the station, when your too pissed to walk, and try and touch you up.... just a thought! x x x

[IceLion]

For some of the bi's that I know, including me, we calls straights and gays "monos". As to clothing, etc., with metrosexuals so prolific now it's increasingly difficult to tell if that cute boy or girl you're looking at is obtainable.

Working at my last job there was a really cute guy there that everyone swore up and down was gay. Turns out he was metro, though he walked with much more then a bit of a swish and drove a cute green VW bug. My take was that he was afraid of the stigma associated with an "alternative" lifestlye and was living in denial. Of course, this had nothing to do with the fact that I REALLY wanted him. :bigrin:

At any rate, the only thing I have for a saving grace is an acute gaydar, I can spot a [gay] mono at a hundred yards... and have the bet earnings to prove it! :tongue:

-IceLion :bipride:

[BiCpl69]

Do an online search for gay jewlery & bisexual jewlery, which will give you insight in to what people wear to say who they are.

[codybear3]

I own a Bi-Bear Flag, a Bi-sexual black choker with the bi-colors on the front. Try checking out the following sites. I have ordered bi-dog tags and a bi-cowboy pin from them. My profile has a brown teddy-bear with the cowboy pin on it.

www.outsidethelines.biz www.overtherainbowshop.com

Hope this helps... :bibounce:

[Jeanie2861]

Someone told me that a thumb ring worn on the left hand meant a woman was bi. Can't remember where I heard it. And I haven't been able to verify that.
Just so happens I purchased a thumb ring and placed it on my left hand when I was on vacation in Key West last Christmas. It was months later when I heard that little tidbit.
If anyone knows that it's true, let me know! Otherwise, let's start a tradition! Because it's be said in other forums that it's difficult to know if someone is bi.

:female: Kim

[RainbowBright]

here is a little that i found out using one of the links that someone else posted.. it is interesting to me that these colors have always been my favorites..perhaps i always subconcensiously knew that i was bi.. lol hope this helps :tong:

Symbolism
The pink color represents sexual attraction to the same sex only (gay & lesbian), the blue represents sexual attraction to the opposite sex only (straight) & the resultant overlap color purple represents sexual attraction to both sexes (bi). The key to understanding the symbolism in the Bi Pride Flag is to know that the purple pixels of color blend unnoticeably into both the pink & blue, just as in the 'real world' where bi people blend unnoticeably into both the gay/lesbian & straight communities.
The first Bi Pride Flag was unveiled on Dec 5, 1998. The intent & purpose of the flag is to maximize bisexual pride & visibility.

[nerdslut]

A Blur t-shirt.

.
.
.
.

Joking. I've noticed a trend amongst bisexual people: they either dress extremely eccentrically or extremely cautiously. I definitely belong in the latter.

But far be it for me to think it applies to everyone. The general rule of thumb: expect anything, because most people are bisexual anyway.

[MintyFresh]

Someone told me that a thumb ring worn on the left hand meant a woman was bi. Can't remember where I heard it. And I haven't been able to verify that.
Just so happens I purchased a thumb ring and placed it on my left hand when I was on vacation in Key West last Christmas. It was months later when I heard that little tidbit.
If anyone knows that it's true, let me know! Otherwise, let's start a tradition! Because it's be said in other forums that it's difficult to know if someone is bi.

:female: Kim

Well, I think I might join you and start wearing one too.

Minty

[photogr]

I love all these so called 'signs' that are supposed to signify which group one belongs to. I can remember when wearing suade shoes was a dead give away for homosexuals (oh yeah), and any colour shirt except white! ?Then the long hair debate!! I didn't know about the earing thing and I shall watch out for the thumb ring. Has anyone else got anymore such giveaways? As for the original question I haven't a clue, sorry. :rolleyes:

[Biboz49]

Since reading the most recent article "The Bisexual Flag...." I decided to wear the bi flag as a pin on my coat. As the article indicated, probably there are very few who would recognize the bi flag, even those who are bi (I was one until recently).

Wouldn't it be great if we could readily identify each other with some universal symbol that would be recognized everywhere? But as photogr noticed its probably just a fade of the times and who knows what bi's will be sporting in the future.

It's only been a few days and I've been out in the crowds doing the Christmas shopping thing with my flag displayed noticably and proudly. So far nobody has noticed, or even indicated that they've noticed. No surprise there. But I'll continue to wear it. Better to advertise rather than do nothing - who knows? maybe it will catch on!

[yaknowthatguy]

Someone told me that a thumb ring worn on the left hand meant a woman was bi. Can't remember where I heard it. And I haven't been able to verify that.
Just so happens I purchased a thumb ring and placed it on my left hand when I was on vacation in Key West last Christmas. It was months later when I heard that little tidbit.
If anyone knows that it's true, let me know! Otherwise, let's start a tradition! Because it's be said in other forums that it's difficult to know if someone is bi.

:female: Kim

Okay, this is a cool idea for the women....but what of the men? Any suggestions? (I'm looking for one, as I have none myself)

[Driver 8]

Sometimes I think straight people are the only ones thinking about gay/bi "codes." I've heard straight people saying if a man has an earring on one side or another, he's gay (but they can't seem to agree about which ear.) And when we were teenagers, we all believed that wearing green on Thursday was the secret sign you were gay when, really, it was just an excuse to hassle anyone who forgot about the "rule." I seriously doubt any of these codes were ever actually in use.

I've known lesbian women who wore labrys symbols and freedom rings to quietly cue in strangers; I've also seen the lambda necklaces at GLBT bookstores, though I can't recall if I've ever seen anyone actually wearing one. In general it seems like these symbols are only understood within the community (though an elderly woman I knew once pointed to a neighbor's rainbow flag and said "That's the gay people's flag, you know. I saw them in San Francisco.")

I'm hoping that the bi flag colors (or some other bi symbol) catches on to the point that it's worth wearing. I've worn T-shirts that said "Bisexual Pride" in big letters, but they tend to attract the attention of idiots ... :rolleyes:

[bidownunder]

This is from bi.org.au Australia’s main bi web site. I don’t know if anybody pays any attention to it anymore.

Spot the bi from the crowd
The Bi-band code like the hanky code used by leather men and women provides a visual method to quickly establish potential trade. Bi people are everywhere and have specific sexual desires, unfortunately it can be very time consuming trying to find the right person or people for play. By introducing the bi-band code we hope to make the search easier.
Bi-bands are usually made of fabric and worn around the wrist like a bracelet, we hope to have some samples available shortly. Any questions or feedback please contact glenn@bi.org.au

Bi-Band Colours

Worn on LeftFor Couple/Group Worn on RightFor Single

Colour

Red
Mixed Couple seeking single of either gender
Single seeking mixed couple

Red and White
Mixed Couple seeking single male
Single seeking same-sex couple

Red and Black
Mixed Couple seeking single female
Single seeking couple of any combination

Green
Same-sex couple seeking single of either gender

Green and White
Same-sex couple seeking single of opposite-gender Single seeking same-sex couple of opposite gender to themselves

Green and Black
Same-sex couple seeking single of same-gender Single seeking same-sex couple of same gender to themselves

Blue
Mixed couple seeking mixed couple
Single seeking single of either gender

Blue and White
Mixed couple seeking female couple
Single seeking single of opposite-gender

Blue and Black
Mixed couple seeking male couple
Single seeking single of same-gender

Purple
Same-sex couple seeking mixed couple

Purple and White
Same-sex couple seeking couple of opposite gender to them

Purple and Black
Same-sex couple seeking couple of same gender to them

Orange
Couple/Group have mixed orgy organised
Single seeking mixed orgy

Orange and Black
Couple/Group have same-gender orgy organised Single seeking same-gender orgy

Yellow
Couple/Group seeking anything that moves*
Single seeking anything that moves*

Black Leather
Couple/Group seeking single for BDSM play
Single seeking couple/group for BDSM play





I'm a bit thick when it comes to picking up hints, even bl**dy obvious ones, from men, let alone women. And my gaydar/bidar suffers from constant interference :bigrin:

So, I would like to know, should they even exist, whether there are certain types of clothing, jewellery, fashion accessories, etc., when worn, or worn in a certain fashion, that says the wearer is bi. I know that there are, and have been in the past, especially amongst the gay people, certain styles of dress that say "I'm gay" to other gay people, but would perhaps be unremarked upon by straights, so perhaps there are things I'm missing.

For instance, I've both ears pierced, where as straight men (in the UK at least) have the left pierced, and gay men the right. Well, ok, its an old-ish stereotype, but you get the picture

Also, there must be certain keys words and phrases that Bi people use to announce there sexuality like gay people do. A favourite gay phrase I like is "a friend of Dorothy's", a reference to the Wizard of Oz, so perhaps there must be things I'm missing (besides a nice boy and nice girl to settle down with) ;)

[3naib]

HOLY CRAP BiDownUnder!!!!!

:eek:

That was SOOOO confusing, I had trouble reading it, much less comitting it to memory for future identification of my community!

May I suggest you ***WWWWWAAAAAAYYYYYYY**** simplify it before you start production? It just seems overboard on complication and if it is not accessible to the community for ease and understanding, it would defeat the purpose: to catch on!

I have some ideas to help... but don't have time to think it through at the moment.

I'd also suggest that you reach out to the community and ask them to participate in creating these identifications. Give me a holler if you'd like any input.

:flag1:

-3naib

[yaknowthatguy]

HOLY CRAP BiDownUnder!!!!!

That was SOOOO confusing, I had trouble reading it, much less comitting it to memory for future identification of my community!
-3naib

I would agree with 3naib, it's a pretty complicated nomenclature, and I've been pondering this for a few days.

While it may be a bit hokey, I was thinking back to the days of high school (late 80s). Friendship bracelets had been very popular back then, made of various types of thin yarn or needlepoint floss. Why not just make one of the 3 colors of the bi flag? Or, since Lance Armstrong made them so popular with the LiveStrong silicone bracelets, how about having some tri-tone ones made like the flag?

thoughts anyone?

[nightwatcher]

I would agree with 3naib, it's a pretty complicated nomenclature, and I've been pondering this for a few days.

While it may be a bit hokey, I was thinking back to the days of high school (late 80s). Friendship bracelets had been very popular back then, made of various types of thin yarn or needlepoint floss. Why not just make one of the 3 colors of the bi flag? Or, since Lance Armstrong made them so popular with the LiveStrong silicone bracelets, how about having some tri-tone ones made like the flag?

thoughts anyone?

Release tricolour addidas shoes on 23 sept! Is it 23 Sept? Can't remember the date but you get my idea...

Best Wishes to all at Bisexual.com
NW

[80's90's]

Release tricolour addidas shoes on 23 sept! Is it 23 Sept? Can't remember the date but you get my idea...

Best Wishes to all at Bisexual.com
NW

*Disclaimer: These are general, not meant to offend, not meant to stereotype or be verbatim as 100% absolute. Styles change so frequently, what can you expect?
I've lived in the Portland, Oregon area for 13 years and had to walk down town (5th/Taylor) for employment, I lived on 12th avenue and I’ve been around the Pearl District area etc. walked all over downtown when I first moved there. I learned really quickly the LGBT areas, and learned quite a bit about their community, speech patterns and dress styles.
Bisexual men and women utilize dress codes from the straight side and the homosexual side depending on their own preferences.
Bisexual Men: For example, if bisexual men want to hide their sexuality, you will never find out. But, for bisexual men wearing office attire, I’ve worked with more than a couple: the V neck under shirt, dress shirts of flamboyant bright colors and stripes, dots, (straight men may wear salmon but *typically* not pink, purple or pastels), same goes for ties of pink or bright colors with stripes, dots etc., shoes: long in the toe, really long. Belts typically have a flamboyance or flash in embroidery, shiny metal for example. Bisexual haircuts, ever see the cartoon character TinTin? Or PeeWee herman? Those types of hairstyles are prevalent. Flamboyant hair mid to long spiky hair, heavy gel for different styles. May wear makeup on the face. Flamboyant glasses.
Where do they crossover? In the crew cut of mid length and the buzz cut, very had to tell just based on the hairstyle.
The hipster dress style is very prevalent among bisexuals and homosexuals, thicker big rimmed black glasses, beanies. Very hard to tell straight from LGB in this area, but tight jeans that hug real snug down to the ankle and shoes of pink, bright colors show a definite trend.
The biggest determinate factor, is the dialect, often with a lisp in speech at the end of the S sounding words. “Yesss, I would totally like to go there. You’re so fabulousss.” I’ve heard two gay men talk that way. Bisexuals can use that to display their sexuality if they’re looking for another bisexual man. Women use this dialect as well.
Bisexual Women: Hair is usually short, the shorter the more Lesbian or Bisexual they *could* be. But when coupled with dress, I could tell who I wouldn’t really have a chance with being straight on *most* occasions of course. Tomboy clothing of course helps, speech patterns helped the most. Dress, same flamboyance, but it can be harder to tell for me as a man.
Now back to my disclaimer, in some cases, straight men like the way bisexual and homosexuals dress, they typically don’t like it when they find out that it is LGB style codes, like myself, not because “THATS Gay!” But because I want to represent myself as straight and attract straight women.
So it can be very hard to tell.
Experience: I’ve been hit on by a homosexual male and I noted what I was wearing, a tight black beanie on my head, I removed it and never had a problem since. I was standing on the Maxline which is the electric tram in Portland, and I had a gay man walk by he said “you look nice” I said “thanks” and he said “you’re straight I can tell”. I would have never been able to tell he was gay, had he not started talking, but his form of speech tipped me off before he said I was straight, I could tell he was either Gay or Bisexual.
There you have it, I can tell coming from a straight man, you might be offended. But all I have to say is this. I’ve lived in Portland, it has a huge LGBT community and I’ve seen quite a bit. Don’t believe me? Then move there. But I’m not a liar, I can just as easily catalog straight dress codes. I could type maybe more but would risk stereotyping because indeed some straight men model after the LGB community. I’ve done it more than once before and have to watch my dress. But I wouldn’t prohibit a straight person dressing that way, it is always nice to understand where something comes from before you dress a certain way. That is how I feel at least.
Take care.

[pole_smoker]

*Disclaimer: These are general, not meant to offend, not meant to stereotype or be verbatim as 100% absolute. Styles change so frequently, what can you expect?
I've lived in the Portland, Oregon area for 13 years and had to walk down town (5th/Taylor) for employment, I lived on 12th avenue and I’ve been around the Pearl District area etc. walked all over downtown when I first moved there. I learned really quickly the LGBT areas, and learned quite a bit about their community, speech patterns and dress styles.
Bisexual men and women utilize dress codes from the straight side and the homosexual side depending on their own preferences.
Bisexual Men: For example, if bisexual men want to hide their sexuality, you will never find out. But, for bisexual men wearing office attire, I’ve worked with more than a couple: the V neck under shirt, dress shirts of flamboyant bright colors and stripes, dots, (straight men may wear salmon but *typically* not pink, purple or pastels), same goes for ties of pink or bright colors with stripes, dots etc., shoes: long in the toe, really long. Belts typically have a flamboyance or flash in embroidery, shiny metal for example. Bisexual haircuts, ever see the cartoon character TinTin? Or PeeWee herman? Those types of hairstyles are prevalent. Flamboyant hair mid to long spiky hair, heavy gel for different styles. May wear makeup on the face. Flamboyant glasses.
Where do they crossover? In the crew cut of mid length and the buzz cut, very had to tell just based on the hairstyle.
The hipster dress style is very prevalent among bisexuals and homosexuals, thicker big rimmed black glasses, beanies. Very hard to tell straight from LGB in this area, but tight jeans that hug real snug down to the ankle and shoes of pink, bright colors show a definite trend.
The biggest determinate factor, is the dialect, often with a lisp in speech at the end of the S sounding words. “Yesss, I would totally like to go there. You’re so fabulousss.” I’ve heard two gay men talk that way. Bisexuals can use that to display their sexuality if they’re looking for another bisexual man. Women use this dialect as well.
Bisexual Women: Hair is usually short, the shorter the more Lesbian or Bisexual they *could* be. But when coupled with dress, I could tell who I wouldn’t really have a chance with being straight on *most* occasions of course. Tomboy clothing of course helps, speech patterns helped the most. Dress, same flamboyance, but it can be harder to tell for me as a man.
Now back to my disclaimer, in some cases, straight men like the way bisexual and homosexuals dress, they typically don’t like it when they find out that it is LGB style codes, like myself, not because “THATS Gay!” But because I want to represent myself as straight and attract straight women.
So it can be very hard to tell.
Experience: I’ve been hit on by a homosexual male and I noted what I was wearing, a tight black beanie on my head, I removed it and never had a problem since. I was standing on the Maxline which is the electric tram in Portland, and I had a gay man walk by he said “you look nice” I said “thanks” and he said “you’re straight I can tell”. I would have never been able to tell he was gay, had he not started talking, but his form of speech tipped me off before he said I was straight, I could tell he was either Gay or Bisexual.
There you have it, I can tell coming from a straight man, you might be offended. But all I have to say is this. I’ve lived in Portland, it has a huge LGBT community and I’ve seen quite a bit. Don’t believe me? Then move there. But I’m not a liar, I can just as easily catalog straight dress codes. I could type maybe more but would risk stereotyping because indeed some straight men model after the LGB community. I’ve done it more than once before and have to watch my dress. But I wouldn’t prohibit a straight person dressing that way, it always nice to understand where something comes from before you dress a certain way. That is how I feel at least.
Take care.
I have no desire to dress like that, act like that, or talk with a feminine lisp. Most bisexual and gay men feel the same way in that there's no need to dress a certain way, act flamboyantly, or do anything besides just be yourself and being out about your sexuality.

[CelticWolf]

Okay, this is a cool idea for the women....but what of the men? Any suggestions? (I'm looking for one, as I have none myself)


Maybe a thumb ring on both hands? Its a thought.

[James72]

Been told if a guy has a gold wedding band on little finger of the right hand he is either bi or gay.Also if you have your right nipple pierced is another gay sign.Thats a little extreme,

[olmizzou42]

Usually, if I see a guy with a pierced right ear only I figure he's gay. But, nowadays, people do pretty much what pleases them personally so who knows. The old rhyme:

Left ear, right ear.
Right ear, wrong ear.
Both ears, queer.

no longer applies.

[SC24FUN]

We have "friendship" bracelets in the BI pride colors that we wear. 29657

[bj4ubi]

We have "friendship" bracelets in the BI pride colors that we wear. 29657

I have star tattoo on my right wrist to show I'm bi

[olmizzou42]

Sometimes I think straight people are the only ones thinking about gay/bi "codes." I've heard straight people saying if a man has an earring on one side or another, he's gay (but they can't seem to agree about which ear.) And when we were teenagers, we all believed that wearing green on Thursday was the secret sign you were gay when, really, it was just an excuse to hassle anyone who forgot about the "rule." I seriously doubt any of these codes were ever actually in use.

I've known lesbian women who wore labrys symbols and freedom rings to quietly cue in strangers; I've also seen the lambda necklaces at GLBT bookstores, though I can't recall if I've ever seen anyone actually wearing one. In general it seems like these symbols are only understood within the community (though an elderly woman I knew once pointed to a neighbor's rainbow flag and said "That's the gay people's flag, you know. I saw them in San Francisco.")

I'm hoping that the bi flag colors (or some other bi symbol) catches on to the point that it's worth wearing. I've worn T-shirts that said "Bisexual Pride" in big letters, but they tend to attract the attention of idiots ... :rolleyes:

Driver, I'd forgotten about the old "green on Thursday" thing. Thanks for a pleasant memory!

[cuttin2dachase]

I am very happily closeted and wouldn't consider dressing a certain way or wearing certain jewelry or symbols in order to advertise my bisexual orientation in public. A lot of straight people pick up on such things and that's exactly what I wish to avoid. If only bi men could come up with a certain subtle phrase that could be used when striking up a casual conversation with another guy. It would be recognized only by other bi men and it would go over the heads of straight people. Gay guys would inevitably pick up on it, but that would be OK with me. Bi married men are my preference, but I wouldn't be averse to meeting gay men who know the bi "secret code" ;)

I've felt a few men tap or graze the palm of my hand with their middle ("bird") finger as we released a firm handshake. I thought it to be unintentional until the 3rd time it happened to me. It's been 10 or more years since the last time it happened, but I've often wondered if it was or wasn't an intentional mm signal. I've even thought of doing it myself to gage the reaction when innocently or purposely meeting a hot guy. Has anyone else heard of this or experienced it? I wonder if str8 men would think it to be gay or just blow it off (no pun intended) as incidental contact. If it doesn't faze a str8 man, maybe it could become a universal secret bi/gay handshake LOL

[pole_smoker]

I am very happily closeted and wouldn't consider dressing a certain way or wearing certain jewelry or symbols in order to advertise my bisexual orientation in public. A lot of straight people pick up on such things and that's exactly what I wish to avoid. If only bi men could come up with a certain subtle phrase that could be used when striking up a casual conversation with another guy. It would be recognized only by other bi men and it would go over the heads of straight people. Gay guys would inevitably pick up on it, but that would be OK with me. Bi married men are my preference, but I wouldn't be averse to meeting gay men who know the bi "secret code" ;)

I've felt a few men tap or graze the palm of my hand with their middle ("bird") finger as we released a firm handshake. I thought it to be unintentional until the 3rd time it happened to me. It's been 10 or more years since the last time it happened, but I've often wondered if it was or wasn't an intentional mm signal. I've even thought of doing it myself to gage the reaction when innocently or purposely meeting a hot guy. Has anyone else heard of this or experienced it? I wonder if str8 men would think it to be gay or just blow it off (no pun intended) as incidental contact. If it doesn't faze a str8 man, maybe it could become a universal secret bi/gay handshake LOL
Or you could just...you know...come out to people, tell them in person that you're bisexual when you communicate with them, stop being such a hypocritical chickenshit coward about being bisexual, and stop completely showing unease about being bisexual or anything but heterosexual when it's clear to everyone you're not heterosexual. :rolleyes:

The majority of bisexual and even gay men want nothing to do either sexually or socially with men who are like you are closeted...which is not surprising since you're more trouble than you're worth. :smilies15 But you live at home in your mom's spare room and have phone/cyber sex and think nobody else knows you're bisexual let alone your ex wives who you cheated on, and other family members that know for sure you're not hetero. :rolleyes:

[bigbozak66]

I just joined this group and I have to say....Pole Smoker, ("super member" my ass) you are fucking harsh!

The beauty of life is living as YOU see fit and not how others expect you to live.

Leave Cutting alone... you asshole bully!

[cuttin2dachase]

I just joined this group and I have to say....Pole Smoker, ("super member" my ass) you are fucking harsh!

The beauty of life is living as YOU see fit and not how others expect you to live.

Leave Cutting alone... you asshole bully!

@ bigbozak66: You needn't defend me concerning the comments made by the likes of small_poker. He lashes out at anybody and everybody who expresses an opinion different than his or who does not live the bi (or gay) lifestyle the same way he lives it. Anyway, welcome to the site ! If you want to improve your experience and fun on this site, put small_poker on ignore. You'll not ever see or read any of his vitriolic, sociopathic diatribe. I haven't read any of his posts in over a year and didn't read his last post on this thread, but he is so predictable and his train of perverted, convoluted thought runs on a one way track. I know without reading his last post that he attacked me for being closeted as he does to anyone else who prefers to be closeted and he included several of his usual 5th grade-ish insults and taunts.