Feeling guilty

[Maverickman66]

Hi guys , after I have fucked guys and I cum with them I always feel guilty because I’m married to a beautiful wife , I then say to myself not doing this again, next day I want to fuck guys again lol! Anyone else feel this way?

[KDaddy23]

A lot of guys feel the guilt and many learn to ignore it over time... and some still find it bothersome. The question I'd ask you - and anyone feeling this way - is do you feel guilty before you cum?

[Maverickman66]

No i never feel any guilt before I cum , in fact sometimes to avoid the guilt I fuck and get fucked and only pre cum then no guilt !

[CurEUs_Male]

Are you out to your wife?
Most likely the guilt is surfacing (when the rush is over) because it goes against something else... If your wife knows, and is accepting, what is causing the guilt? Internal homophobia? Societal pressure?
If your wife does not know, that would be the most likely source.

[KDaddy23]

I asked the question because in all of my experiences, it's kinda rare for a guy to feel so guilty that it makes them sick to their stomach... while they're doing whatever they're doing. I know some guys do think, "I shouldn't be doing this!" but it rarely stops them from doing it and finishing it but when they cum, holy shit - the guilt can hit them pretty hard. I just happen to know that the guilt isn't always due to the fact that ya just did something you weren't supposed to do - there's a real medical kind of reason for it that I'm not going to explain since I've explained it quite a few times here.

It's actually normal. You either learn to deal with it or you don't. Some don't feel any "guilt" at all.

[Maverickman66]

I asked the question because in all of my experiences, it's kinda rare for a guy to feel so guilty that it makes them sick to their stomach... while they're doing whatever they're doing. I know some guys do think, "I shouldn't be doing this!" but it rarely stops them from doing it and finishing it but when they cum, holy shit - the guilt can hit them pretty hard. I just happen to know that the guilt isn't always due to the fact that ya just did something you weren't supposed to do - there's a real medical kind of reason for it that I'm not going to explain since I've explained it quite a few times here.

It's actually normal. You either learn to deal with it or you don't. Some don't feel any "guilt" at all.
No I haven’t told my wife that I fuck guys and no doubt that will be some of the guilt I’m feeling, if she finds out Divorce! So she can’t ever know. The sex I’m having with guys is so fantastic I can’t stop or even want 2

[NJwood]

I reserve the fucking for my wife. She knows I love sucking cock and thinks I’m very good at it. She has asked if I want to be fucked. I’ve told her with the right situation I’d try it. Always great sex after that.

[GayGuy04]

No I haven’t told my wife that I fuck guys and no doubt that will be some of the guilt I’m feeling, if she finds out Divorce! So she can’t ever know. The sex I’m having with guys is so fantastic I can’t stop or even want 2

Yea you don't wanna hear the D word if your a married guy to a women. That's why most married I've chatted with I'll ask if she knows and the answer usually is "no I'm not out to her"

[NJwood]

Yea you don't wanna hear the D word if your a married guy to a women. That's why most married I've chatted with I'll ask if she knows and the answer usually is "no I'm not out to her"
So much better having started out our dating telling her. Makes it so much easier to go on “dates”. Then I come home with a sense of excitement knowing she wants to hear all about it.

[Bifun2009]

I use to feel guilty when, I first started having sex with men. But, over time and having developed a long term friendship with one guy that lasted over 15 years, the guilt wasn't there, any longer. This buddy, decided to come out and got involved in a relationship with another man to the point they got married. Being that he moved over 250 miles away (and married), I ended up meeting someone else online and have developed another friendship/fuck buddy and been seeing him for 8 years. The guilt crept back in again when, I met my second buddy but, it was only for a short time until, we got to know each other and became really comfortable with one another. Now, I look forward to meeting up with him each time because the sex we have gets better and more experimental, every time we get together.

I just started dating a woman that is 12 years younger than me and, we haven't gotten to the sex part, yet. It would be great to find out if, she is adventurous and would want to be involved with my buddy and I, during our sex visits but, it will most likely, just be a pipe dream. But, I'll remain hopeful :)

[Oborokybiman]

I use to feel guilty as a single guy just because I grew up knowing my feelings were “wrong”!! I only found my bi side just over 10 yrs ago when I was as 43 yrs old. I remember watching a buddy of mine in 6th grade showing me how to masturbate and enjoying watching him touch himself. He was a good looking guy and I just brushed it off as what guys help others guys with at that age. He moved away that summer. I think my curiosity would have gotten the best of me!
I never acted on that curiosity again til 2009. When I wanted as far away from women as possible! My guilt strung from me having a son during these times of desire. And of course I didn’t want anyone to find out.
Now I have a new wife and she is very religious to think that men and women and nothing else. I told her about my bi side and didn’t want her to think I would ever cheat on her. I’m hoping she will accept my sexuality and help me find what I need.

[Tag200]

I would say the guilt could be feeling odd about being into guys too. That it’s not fully but fear of being outed or divorce or paying stub guys is not normal.. I feel nervous before and guilty after, but the guilt is more about if I am bi or not or getting a divorce more than the act as I sleep with women too that are not my wife and feel no guilt after

[mike r]

i'm out to my wife and feel no guilt. But as i've said before, years ago we were swingers and no guilt then either

[dowmass]

Hi guys , after I have fucked guys and I cum with them I always feel guilty because I’m married to a beautiful wife , I then say to myself not doing this again, next day I want to fuck guys again lol! Anyone else feel this way?

Let me tell you my story: I was in my seventh grade, I used to talk to my best friend about girls. Then one day from nowhere he showed me his dick and I showed him mine. From that point, we'd jerk off together, and one day I asked him to top me, which he did. He was big, and it hurt like hell.

Fast forward, 35 something years later, I have this BI urge coming back to me. I am still the bottom, and in 8 years slept with two guys - very nice AA guys. The first was a 6.5, cut and thick. and the second was a 8.5, cut and thick.... progress? You bet!. Anyways I loved both encounters.
So about my guilt - well I enjoyed sex with these guys, and I did feel guilty about doing this because my wife is a devoted, nice person. If I was to tell her about my "close encounters", that would kill her, and that would also be the end of the marriage.

That said, my urges do keep coming - like I think there is a sex starved woman hiding inside me that wants to get out..... Can anyone please tell me how to deal with this situation?

[playful808]

> Hi guys , after I have fucked guys and I cum with them I always feel guilty because I’m married to a beautiful wife , I then say to myself not doing this again, next day I want to fuck guys again lol! Anyone else feel this way?

> so fantastic I can’t stop or even want 2

Sounds kind of impulsive, maybe self-destructive. Uncomfortable. Do you have any good role models for addictive behavior?

Many very smart guys somehow piss away a good situation and marriage and wife. Happens every day. They all said “she can never know”, but you roll enough dice and the Truth will Out.

Might be smarter to learn how to talk honestly about sex. With your partner. You might even get what you need.

My 2 cents.

[dowmass]

>

Sounds kind of impulsive, maybe self-destructive. Uncomfortable. Do you have any good role models for addictive behavior?

Many very smart guys somehow piss away a good situation and marriage and wife. Happens every day. They all said “she can never know”, but you roll enough dice and the Truth will Out.

Might be smarter to learn how to talk honestly about sex. With your partner. You might even get what you need.

My 2 cents.

Thanks for your perspective - I think those who are out with their spouses, those who are "swingers" or in an "open marriage" are THE LUCKIEST. This is also a cultural thing - more than religion in my case. I am a Hindu, and there is nothing in my scriptures that say that being gay is wrong. That said, for centuries, both women in India have been drilled the idea that only a man and a woman can have sex. Anything other than that is "UNNATURAL". So is anal sex, and Oral sex as well (even between a man and a woman).

Before you become judgmental, Society in India has changed a lot, there is a lot more sexual independence - Although not common, being gay is not uncommon, women talk about "positions" and anal and oral sex, and orgasm - something that could not have happened 20 years back.

Anyways that does not change the situation like me people with spouses in the 50-60 age group. For such women being gay is still not right.

[wifekinky4husband]

I agree with so many of you gentlemen.

There should be no guilt about the sex, about whom you are having sex with. Sex is sex is sex so long as it is consensual. Of course then there is love or love making, hope you realize they are not one in the same. I have sex with others, we have sex with others, but we never make love with anyone else. From what I read this appears true for you as well. That is good news.

But if you are having sex with someone other than whom you are married to, they need to know. Without that trust there is honestly not much. Yes guilt is only a part of it, there is more, much more to come, time will prove this. You must have honesty and truth or it will eat you up from the inside out.

I know you have a long way to go and to get there will be a precarious journey (since you didn’t do it prior to screwing the pooch) but somehow you must come up with a plan and discuss this with your wife. I promise she will find out one way or another and trust me when I say, better to not be the other.

As I read your posts it is obvious you do not wish to stop being bi so find a ways to make it work with your wife. For me, I slowly introduced my husband into it. I have many posts on this long process, it took quite a bit of time, but oh so worth it. Our later years have been fabulous but only with a lot of patience. You may have to dial back your urges to get things right with your marriage or know that you will most likely lose your wife. By dial it back I mean all the way back until you can communicate this with your wife.

I am not the only one with a similar tale. Two years ago my friend (yes I have a good deal of friends with bi guys as I have mentioned) who’s been married 27 years came to me asking for advice on her husband’s desire to have mmfs. She wasn’t shocked since over the years he had worked it into their sex play, but she wasn’t prepared for the real deal.

I am not a big fan of porn movies but a few clips here and there to “get the idea” actually helps on occasion. She knew my desires and feelings on this and asked me a lot of questions finally watching a few shows. She did it naked as I recommended discovering it was quite arousing. So with her husband’s patience over the next year or so she grew more and more accustomed to the idea.

The day she told me that she wanted to see it live I was happy for them. It was arranged and she came out nearly breathless. She had wanted to see only the oral but pleaded to see more. The couple has never looked back, except backdoor – lol. Oh my goodness, I love saying that, it never gets old. She does now as much as I do, they have so many variations now. I love hearing their stories.

[zbi73]

I used to have guilt every time I masturbated to gay porn once I ejaculated but prior I loved every minute of it. I would swear that it was the last time but within a day or so off I'd go again. I called it Cummer's guilt and I felt like this until I accepted I was bisexual and therefore normal for me. I now have no guilt but I realise it's only masturbation and it may all have to be dealt with again when the real thing happens.