More Humane Bisexual Issues and Concerns.

[tenni]

1/ A man presents the issue of men turning to other men for sex because their wives are no longer interested in sex. He discusses how does gentle touching during what he sees as an enjoyable making dinner, after dinner conversations but when in bed and he touches his wife’s hip and she tells him not tonight. He is left frustrated more so than horny. He wonders why she won't give him five minutes hand job or bj.


2/ A bisexual man wants to talk about being married with children and the confusion that he feels about his bisexual urges


3/ A mature man beginning a platonic friendship with a younger man. They enjoy each other’s company but the mature man questions why the younger man is interested in him as a friend. He wonders if it is normal to feel worried about the age gap or if the younger man is just being polite. He wonders if the younger man is interested in sex or friendship.


4/ Discussion of bisexuality and religion. The religious condemnation of bisexuality and homosexuality with a struggle for desiring same sex and opposite sex. Wanting to honour your religion but struggle with your bisexuality.


5/ Gym behaviour. Should you peek at other guys’ junk in the change room? How do you deal with getting hard in the communal showers of a gym?

The above topics are no longer visible on this bisexual site. The concerns represent a more rounded humane aspect of bisexuality. Hopefully we can we can discuss these ideas without toxic reactions.

Have you had these concerns in your bisexual life? Do you still grapple with these issues or have you found a solution?

[SilkyHoseLover]

Aw, who cares about all that touchy-feely crap and long, drawn-out discussions, when we can just click button and vote for our favorite place to bust a nut when we jerk off and what we do with the cum...?? :rolleyes: </sarc>

[tenni]

Toxic reaction shown above.

[Country Guy]

I was going to respond to that thread (in #1) but I decided against it. I'm in the same situation. I couldn't add anything positive so I decided to be quiet.

I'm just glad that the threads that I chose not to read are marked read when I log off.

[Christopher South]

1/ A man presents the issue of men turning to other men for sex because their wives are no longer interested in sex. He discusses how does gentle touching during what he sees as an enjoyable making dinner, after dinner conversations but when in bed and he touches his wife’s hip and she tells him not tonight. He is left frustrated more so than horny. He wonders why she won't give him five minutes hand job or bj.
Probably the biggest issue here is the different view men and women have about sex. Since I had a lot of issues in my marriage I've been on a lot of marriage forums and the difference is startling. WOmen (and I know I'm generalizing) view sex as interest and then arousal, while guys view it as arousal and then interest. Also women usually don't have "immediate" needs. So while those intimate touches during dinner get a guy aroused, it will take a lot longer for the woman to generate interest and then arousal.


2/ A bisexual man wants to talk about being married with children and the confusion that he feels about his bisexual urges

Part of being an adult is being able to talk about things like this. I guess the question is who is he talking to? A future wife? Of course it should be discussed. However I don't see a problem with being bi and having kids.


3/ A mature man beginning a platonic friendship with a younger man. They enjoy each other’s company but the mature man questions why the younger man is interested in him as a friend. He wonders if it is normal to feel worried about the age gap or if the younger man is just being polite. He wonders if the younger man is interested in sex or friendship

Not necessarily related to bisexuality (or homosexuality). An older guy who befriends a younger woman will have the same questions... is she after my money? Desperate to have kids? Needs a sugar daddy? Father issues? Any of these relationships (man/woman, man/,man, woman/woman) could go from platonic to more than platonic. But communication about expectations beforehand are key.


4/ Discussion of bisexuality and religion. The religious condemnation of bisexuality and homosexuality with a struggle for desiring same sex and opposite sex. Wanting to honour your religion but struggle with your bisexuality.

Not a particularly religious person but look at it this way. Outside the organized religion, as in the rest of us walking around, we pick and choose the beliefs we want to follow... be it divorce, abortion, birth control, etc... I came to peace a long time ago that I wanted to be religious in my own way but knew it meant compromise and I was OK with that. I know for those who can't compromise it will be harder and I wish you luck. But then again, religions are coming around so if yours isn't, find another.

5/ Gym behaviour. Should you peek at other guys’ junk in the change room? How do you deal with getting hard in the communal showers of a gym?

​I don't get hard in communal showers because I tend not to get hard after working out. I don't schedule sex after working out because I know getting hard will be difficult. But before working out I just try to mind my own business and not be checking out guy's junk.

[tenni]

Thanks Christopher
#1 1/ A man presents the issue of men turning to other men for sex because their wives are no longer interested in sex. He discusses how does gentle touching during what he sees as an enjoyable making dinner, after dinner conversations but when in bed and he touches his wife’s hip and she tells him not tonight. He is left frustrated more so than horny. He wonders why she won't give him five minutes hand job or bj.
​Good points about the difference between men and women when it comes to interest and arousal. The man who expressed this opinion was raising the issue that some men who are in this position for years turn to other men for sexual release. I have spoken with men who have not had sex with their wives for five or more years. Other men refer to sexless marriages where they may have sex with their wives a few times a year. The difference between men and women seems more extreme in those situations but this is not rare. As the original guy asked why not just five to ten minutes for a bj seems reasonable to a lot of men...not women.

2/ A bisexual man wants to talk about being married with children and the confusion that he feels about his bisexual urges
You are correct again. The man had difficulty expressing himself with the post. He seemed to want to share his experience/feelings about his same sex urges and was concerned about his children. He seemed like a man who wished to honour his marriage and wanted his children raised by m/f married couple. Then there was his urges. Like a lot of biguys he found it difficult to talk to his wife about this. Possibly because he couldn't get an understanding about his urges and feeling attracted to other men.

3/ A mature man beginning a platonic friendship with a younger man. They enjoy each other’s company but the mature man questions why the younger man is interested in him as a friend. He wonders if it is normal to feel worried about the age gap or if the younger man is just being polite. He wonders if the younger man is interested in sex or friendship
I think that in this scenario, the older man felt torn between platonic friendship and an age difference. To top it off, he had some sexual attraction to the younger man. He didn't want to look like a foolish old man with sexual interests when he was unsure of the younger man's sexuality.


5/ Gym behaviour. Should you peek at other guys’ junk in the change room? How do you deal with getting hard in the communal showers of a gym?
Christopher. Your no boner fear is interesting. I have heard some guys state that they are horny as hell after working out. Men do look at other guy's cocks in a locker room and communal shower area. Most try to be discreet. I have started or had conversations started recently with a guy in the communal shower. It started by me asking how the steam room was. The steam room was right off the communal shower. I've only seen this other man in the shower area and he says hello now as if we are dressed . I'm comfortable with nudity but really don't usually start conversations with unknown guys in the locker room. The male locker room is an interesting place though...lol

[Melody Dean]

#1 1/ A man presents the issue of men turning to other men for sex because their wives are no longer interested in sex. He discusses how does gentle touching during what he sees as an enjoyable making dinner, after dinner conversations but when in bed and he touches his wife’s hip and she tells him not tonight. He is left frustrated more so than horny. He wonders why she won't give him five minutes hand job or bj.
​Good points about the difference between men and women when it comes to interest and arousal. The man who expressed this opinion was raising the issue that some men who are in this position for years turn to other men for sexual release. I have spoken with men who have not had sex with their wives for five or more years. Other men refer to sexless marriages where they may have sex with their wives a few times a year. The difference between men and women seems more extreme in those situations but this is not rare. As the original guy asked why not just five to ten minutes for a bj seems reasonable to a lot of men...not women.


While I'm lacking the equipment to comment on most of this, I did want to comment on this one.

I've talked to several men that feel more "safe" turning to men for these urges instead of women as well. Safe because it can be just about sex, and safe because, when they don't let their wives know, it feels less like cheating.

[tenni]

Melody I agree to a point. I think that some see it as safer emotionally and emotionally not cheating but just a physical release.

[charles-smythe]

1/ A man presents the issue of men turning to other men for sex because their wives are no longer interested in sex. He discusses how does gentle touching during what he sees as an enjoyable making dinner, after dinner conversations but when in bed and he touches his wife’s hip and she tells him not tonight. He is left frustrated more so than horny. He wonders why she won't give him five minutes hand job or bj.


2/ A bisexual man wants to talk about being married with children and the confusion that he feels about his bisexual urges


3/ A mature man beginning a platonic friendship with a younger man. They enjoy each other’s company but the mature man questions why the younger man is interested in him as a friend. He wonders if it is normal to feel worried about the age gap or if the younger man is just being polite. He wonders if the younger man is interested in sex or friendship.


4/ Discussion of bisexuality and religion. The religious condemnation of bisexuality and homosexuality with a struggle for desiring same sex and opposite sex. Wanting to honour your religion but struggle with your bisexuality.


5/ Gym behaviour. Should you peek at other guys’ junk in the change room? How do you deal with getting hard in the communal showers of a gym?

The above topics are no longer visible on this bisexual site. The concerns represent a more rounded humane aspect of bisexuality. Hopefully we can we can discuss these ideas without toxic reactions.

Have you had these concerns in your bisexual life? Do you still grapple with these issues or have you found a solution?...no...