Single and LGBT = Politically Invisible

[Dapper_Fellow]

I recently saw Zach Wahls on the Daily Show. He's the kid whose Youtube video speaking out against a state amendment banning same sex marriage became viral. Well, the guy recently wrote a book about the values his two moms have instilled in him, and talked about his new campaign, "Out to Dinner" wherein he wants to bring same sex couples and heterosexual couples together so that straight people can see that LGBT people are no different than them. I think his campaign is a great idea. In fact I think it's such a great idea that I'd love to help out, but I can't because I'm single.

Which got me thinking about how single LGBT people are politically invisible. Almost as though we cannot be affirmed to be what we say we are since we aren't with somebody. Has anybody else noticed this? Are there any single LGBT activists of prominence? It's a topic for another post, but it seems that in order to have your voice heard as an LGBT activist one must take pains to assimilate either homonormatively or heteronormatively. What do you all think?


The Illusion of happiness through external means is a desert in which only two herbs flourish, fear and despair.
-Franz Kafka

[Long Duck Dong]

mmm single people are not politically invisible... single people can make as much of a difference as a couple......it just depends on what you are standing for, and what difference you are trying to make........

[elian]

Yes Dapper, there is pressure in society to "get married" and sometimes it seems like people who are married and have children are rewarded more in our society. That doesn't mean that single people aren't valuable or somehow there's something "wrong" with them. As a matter of fact I think more and more people are waiting until much later in life to get "married" if they do at all. (I wish I had a cite for the studies) Anyway, like LDD says - in this particular campaign you may not be able to participate but there are lots of ways that single people can advocate for LGBT rights. For two years I've participated in a "Freedom to Marry" rally Valentine's Day. For such a supposedly "consservative" area you would be surprised at the number of "honks" of support we received..including one from the City Fire Dept's Truck # 69.

There were all sorts of folks at the rally, young, old, single, straight married and committed LGBT partners. I do try to stay away from the news cameras though, I'm still not out at work.

Should say although there are some 'perks" I don't think married people have it any "easier" than single people do - there are definately benefits to having a long term partner but having an intimate 24x7 relationship with someone is hard work. If you live that close to someone for that long there are bound to be differences of opinion and annoyances, but you learn to communicate and find a healthy balance, hopefully.

[æonpax]

`
I'm a single mom and have never found singleness to be an obstacle in getting myself heard politically or otherwise, for me or anyone else.

[Brian]

Slightly off-topic, forgive me... I saw the author of this book appear on a TV show (can't recall which one) a few weeks ago. He documents the huge trend of Americans living alone. It is on my reading wish list but I haven't got to it yet: http://www.amazon.com/Going-Solo-Extraordinary-Surprising-Appeal/dp/1594203229

- Drew :paw:

ps. And yes, I think single people have very little political power, but maybe that will change with more and more people choosing to go solo (like me/us).

[tenni]

Dapper
Do you believe that the only political issue is about same sex marriage?

There are other things that you may become political about that affect bisexuals. Biphobia being one. Bi Erasure or Bi Invisibility is another.

I don't think that single bisexuals need to be politically invisible. This next one is not going to be agreed on by some bisexuals who want to appear monogamous but there is nothing wrong with being single and having friends with benefits(plural). There is nothing wrong with being poly either and such lifestyles are more suitable to some bisexuals. That is an issue that some single bisexuals who chose to be single might want to promote. I believe that regardless of a person's sexuality single is not a dreaded curse for some and increasing numbers are chosing that option for a lifestyle.