Biphobic abuse

[Biguy91]

I was talking on skype with a friend of mine when out of nowhere he invites another mate of his and something like half way through he asked our sexualities so i answered honestly and said bisexual.

Then out of no where i get a raging guy down skype "Not the friend who added him" he was saying stuff like bisexuality is wrong and its disgusting and weird and were all freaks etc.

naturally i was quite hurt by this, so im wonder what you do in situations like this???

How many people are there like this how much abuse for being Bi am i to expect.


Rob :flag2::flag2:

[nbboy1123]

Sadly I have heard a lot of it too. In college if I told a guy I was trying to get with I was bi, he's like, fucking breeder. I hated it. So throughout college I just said I was gay, it was easier that way. I'm sorry you had to put up with that, it's obvious that this guy was ignorant and either jealous or gay/bi himself. Most likely he had a bad situation where someone he liked was bi or str8 and just messed around and he is still spitting hate over it.

But if I can give you any advice it's that you just have to remember that people will judge no matter what and you have to realize you're better than they are for not judging how rude they were to you. So I'm sorry he was mean, but I'm sure many of us are sending hugs and love to cheer you up. :):bipride:

[Realist]

nbboy,

You may have hit the nail on the head, when you wrote: ".....and either jealous or gay/bi himself."

Many times the most vociferous agitators can be closet "deviates" themselves!

It's been my experience that most who can't understand, accept, or agree, with the LBGT lifestyle, aren't always that adamant about showing their contempt for it.

A psychologist told me one time, that often anti-something radicals actually are trying to deflect attention to themselves when they espouse hatred of a behavior, like that.

[bizel]

so sorry you experienced that. unfortunately the world is not perfect. people who ask questions i find, don't always want an honest answer. and when they lash out, it's because they are judging from their life experience. if they a narrow life experience, that's what you'll get- a narrow reply. that's why it's unwise to take other's reactions to heart and make it personal, cos it ain't about you - it's about them. just let it go. it's not your issue, it's theirs.

as for how much abuse can you expect, we all learn to judge. we all do it if we're honest though not necessarily in a nasty way. clothing, speech, finances, silly little things all get judged. if you want to play it safe, be careful how much you give out about personal stuff and to whom. this is not just for sexual stuff - it can relate to anything. i used to open up to workmates but found out harshly that just because you work with them doesn't mean they are friends. we care about you and you have a safe place here. big hug.

[Long Duck Dong]

I am known for being sarcastic and I would have said things back like " thats no way to talk about your parents " and " your partner must be one gifted lady, cos she is like some gay males, she fucks a asshole "

[BiJoe696]

I have to wonder why this person would have even asked. Perhaps looking for someone abuse. Another internet bully type? Don't sweat it, move on.

:bipride:

[softfruit]

Still happens - and not just online, there was biphobic crap from the main stages at at least two Prides in the UK this summer. Upgrade to a better class of skype friend! :)

[Biguy91]

Still happens - and not just online, there was biphobic crap from the main stages at at least two Prides in the UK this summer. Upgrade to a better class of skype friend! :)

Where are these Prides??

Plus my mates that i talk to on skype are all very friendly so no harm there just that one mindless person.

[darkeyes]

Phobias of all kinds.. went out 2 me car this afty an wot did me find written all ova the snow covad windscreen.. one word.. "DYKES".. bit of an insult 2 Kate but will let it pass..:)

[Biguy91]

Phobias of all kinds.. went out 2 me car this afty an wot did me find written all ova the snow covad windscreen.. one word.. "DYKES".. bit of an insult 2 Kate but will let it pass..:)




What i don't understand is how people can be so mean about the way your born lol can be funny sometimes other times hurtful, takes a brainless moron to be mean about sexuality.....


Rob :flag3::flag2::flag3:

[nbboy1123]

What i don't understand is how people can be so mean about the way your born lol can be funny sometimes other times hurtful, takes a brainless moron to be mean about sexuality.....


Rob :flag3::flag2::flag3:


Sadly brainless morons are everywhere and can be mean about everything. I wouldn't let it get you down Mate. Just move on and find new friends who accept you for who you are:

Be who you are because those that don't matter mind and those that don't mind matter!:flag1:

[BiCycler]

Off the top, I'm sorry you had to be on the receiving end of the shit storm that is someone else's issue. No one deserves that. I understand how you feel. As others have said, there are people that will do stuff like that and there are a billion avenues of attack: sexuality only being one of them. Realist spoke to deflection. I believe that is often the case but I believe that that deflection is sometimes internal and the abuser is having very real issuses facing their own sexuality.
Getting back to this being someone else's issue: I mean to say that it does not belong to you. He is the one that went on the tirade. He owns it. I teach grade two students. I teach them to seperate other's behaviours from their own and to try to understand that the only behaviour one can control is their own. (I looked inward after some years of teaching, asking if I was practicing what I preached and found I wasn't but very soon started to see the positive effect on my dealings with others as soon as I did start practicing what I preached. I only type what's in the brackets so I don't sound like I'm full of myself and some know it all). After accepting that someone else's behaviours are theirs and not mine, a weight lifts from my shoulders because the responsibility is soley theirs too. I divide my behaviours, actions and reactions, from other(s) in any interaction where I don't feel good afterward, like how you must have felt after Skyping that day. I give back those behaviours that are not mine and I'm left with my own. If after that, I don't like what I see, it is mine to change. My world changed when I discovered that. I was somewhere near 40 years old by the time that happened. Some of the 6 and 7 year olds in my class practice it daily. I know it helps little with how a nasty interaction leaves me feeling, but it does help me sort things out.
I like what LDD says. Hold your head high, believe in yourself and let it go.:flag2::rainbow:

[bizel]

what did your original friend say to his 'butt-in'friend? did he put him right? did he defend you? part of friendship is loyalty and when a mate is being attacked, you step in and help them. maybe the problem is not so much the 'butt-in' friend, but the original one. if he's not prepared to stand by your side, then maybe he's not a real friend. mates stick together. i don't always agree with my husband's choices but i'd go down swinging fists for him. and i prefer peace but i will verbally go someone who is 'kicking' an 'underdog', without hesitation.